Page 25 of Chaos
The way her knees gave out, it looked more like a collapse than an intentional choice. She was reeling both from the mental assault and the revelation.
“Are you going to help me with those barriers then?”
“That is the goal, yes.”
“And that little display you just did?”
“Proof of how badly you require my assistance. So that the next time I tell you to do something, you understand why it’s in your best interest to do so.”
She wrinkled her nose. “This is your ‘because you said so’ moment, isn’t it?”
“You’re a fast learner.”
“Sure doesn’t feel like it. How can I defend myself when I can’t even tell that my mind is being fucked with?” She rubbed at her temples, discomfort evident in her posture.
“Headache?”
“Yes. I feel like I haven’t slept in days.”
“It’ll go away in a bit.”
She sighed. “I’m not even sure where to start. How does one build a mental barrier? Is it something I need to focus on at all times? What about when I’m sleeping? Or focused on something else? I’m a decent multitasker, but that seems impossible.”
“No one creates a worldwide pandemic on their first go-round.”
Merri stared at me. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
“I just mean to say that you must crawl before you run. Every plague begins with a sneeze, you know?”
“Pretty sure that can’t be accurate.”
“Oh, are you an expert now?”
“I’m just saying, some diseases aren’t airborne, so how can they start with a sneeze?”
“You’ve missed the point.”
“Have I? Or is your analogy flawed?”
“Now I have a headache.”
She was returning to her plucky self, the infuriating brat I couldn’t help but be drawn to. This back and forth with her was, dare I say, fun.
“So how do you build a wall?”
“Well, like most good defenses, first you must become familiar with what you are defending against. You need toa: recognize the threat level so you can respect it, andb: become familiar with the sensation—or symptoms, if you will. Once you can recognize that, you will instinctively understand how to block it.”
“Now I know you’re bullshitting me.”
“I’m not. Think of your immune system. It has to come into contact with a contagion in order to create the defense required to resist it. Same idea.”
“That . . . actually made sense.”
I smirked.
“Did you know when I was little I used to imagine my blood cells like an army? The white ones were dressed like knights and rode white horses because they were there to save the day.”
She might be the most adorable creature I’d ever laid eyes upon.
