Page 62 of Beyond Repair
Katie paused at the entrance to the upstairs playroom. Benji and Jack were both huddled over the iPad; but what drew her eye was Sam sitting on the floor with both Finlay and Baby Thomas snuggled into him, readingThe Gruffalo. More shocking still was that he was doing the voices. Katie’s mouth dropped open, and as he changed from the Gruffalo’s deep, growly voice to the mouse’s high squeaky one, she had to stifle a surprised giggle. Sam’s head snapped up as he heard Katie’s muffled snort, and he narrowed his eyes at her before his lips curled up in a small smile.
‘Uncka Sammy!’ Finlay shouted, grabbing Sam’s face and trying to force it down to the book again. ‘Wead it! Wead it!’ Sam dutifully finished the last page, still with voices, and by the time he was done Baby Thomas (or just Thomas as he had now been usurped of his baby title) was asleep in his arms. Katie moved to them and lifted Thomas up. When she got back from settling him in the cot in his own room, the remaining boys and Sam had moved onto playing table football.
‘Are they okay?’ Sam asked, abandoning his place at the table to walk over to her, a fierce frown on his face. She smiled reassuringly and realised that Sam was not an optimist. In his world, if something was going to go wrong it probably would. Life must have taught him that.
Unfortunately she didn’t know the half of it.
‘They’re fine, Sam. A beautiful baby boy.’ She saw the relief flood his face and the tension drain out of his body.
‘We’ve got another brother?’ asked Benji, leaving the table to run over to Katie.
She nodded. ‘Oliver,’ she told him.
‘Hurrah!’ cried Jack, picking up Finlay and spinning him around. ‘Boys win, girls in the bin!’ Katie smiled and shook her head as all three of them started chanting the rhyme as they sped downstairs to check out the newest addition to the family.
‘You’re really great with them,’ Katie said, and Sam shrugged.
‘Sarah always sort of managed to suck me in by hook or by crook. She’s … persistent.’ Katie laughed.
‘That’s one way to describe her.’ Their eyes met for a moment, before Katie looked away and started tidying up the room.
‘Look … um … I’m going to stay for a while and then I’ll probably take the kids over to mine for the night … um …’ She trailed off, unsure why she was prattling on to Sam about her plans. He was still staring at her, and she wished he’d take his broody self off somewhere else.
‘Katie,’ he said, his voice unusually hoarse and even slightly strangled. He cleared his throat and continued, ‘I …’ She looked up to see him rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, uncharacteristically hesitant. ‘Look, can you just stop that for a minute,’ he said, and to Katie’s surprise she felt her upper arm clasped in his iron grip and was hauled up to her feet, iPad in one hand and Finlay’s stuffed dog in the other.
As far as Katie was concerned there was nothing left to say. If he’d wanted to talk to her, he could have answered her phone calls or the texts she’d left him over the last two weeks. And anyway, what was the point? So he wanted to smooth things over with her and make everything less awkward when they ran into each other like this; bully for him. For Katie the whole thing was too raw to start rehashing and sweeping under the carpet. She was happy for a few years to pass until she had to see him again. Maybe then she could treat him like a casual acquaintance, but she wasn’t up for any more humiliation right now.
‘Let. Go,’ she bit out, yanking her arm out of his hand and taking a step back.
‘Please,’ she heard him whisper, his hand lifting towards her and his face suffused with what looked like pain. She frowned at him in confusion before he closed his eyes and his head gave a tiny shake. When he opened them, his familiar blank mask had replaced the pain in his expression, and his hand had dropped back to his side. She shrugged.
‘Sam, what do you want from me?’ she asked baldly, never one to play games.
‘I … I don’t know,’ he told her; but it almost seemed like he was talking to himself. Mary Longley’s words echoed around Katie’s head:‘Sometimes pain runs too deep … There are other ways to be hurt.’
‘Sam?’ Katie called softly. Of their own accord her feet took a step towards him, but it was Sam’s turn to take a step back.
‘I’d better go,’ he told her in a hollow voice, and she narrowed her eyes at his retreating back, refusing to give into the pricking behind them, or the insane urge to run after him.
Chapter 31
Let me tell you a story
Katie was exhausted, both emotionally and physically. It had been three months since Baby Oliver was born, and today had been the first day she’d had to see Sam. Sarah and Rob had finally decided to have all the boys christened as a job lot. The older boys were asked to choose their own godparents, and Benji had chosen Katie and Sam. Sarah had been nervous when she told Katie a month ago that she would be sharing godparent duties with him. To Katie it was a worst-case scenario; she would have no hope of avoiding him. But she knew it was what Sarah and Rob wanted, she knew how close they were to Sam, and maybe she didn’t understand it but she could accept it. So she’d laughed it off with Sarah, telling her not to be a prat and that she wasn’t such a twp bugger that she’d still be mooning over a bloke who’d dumped her months ago. Sarah had given her a sceptical look but thankfully hadn’t pushed the subject.
That morning, Katie had arrived at the house to hear raised male voices as she opened the front door.
‘I’m getting help, you prick. I’ve been going to counselling for over three months now. I’ll be perfectly fine,’ she heard Sam shout.
‘Christ,’ Rob blasted back. ‘You really are a stubborn git, aren’t you? There’s plenty to do inthisgoddamn country. Ineedyou here, you selfish bastard.’
‘Somebody with experience needs to go out there before it turns into an all-out clusterfuck.’
‘I’ve got plenty of men to go.’
‘None of them are up to it and you know it.’
There was shuffling, and then Katie heard a crash. Her eyes widening, she unfroze and hurried down the corridor. When she reached the entrance to the kitchen, she sucked in a shocked breath. Rob had Sam up against the floor-to-ceiling cupboards, the front of his shirt fisted in both hands.
