Page 76 of Anything but Easy
“You can’t come in there with me anyway,” I told him. “So, you may as well justgo.”
He blew out a frustrated breath. “Okay, fuck Barclay,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest. My eyes went wide. Sam had always kept up a formal veneer when on the job, even with me. “He’s obviously been a prick. ButI’mnot comfortable with you going in there on your own. Why would they sendyou, anyway?”
I bristled and crossed my own arms. “Whyshouldn’tthey send me?” I asked in a dangerous voice. He had the grace to look uncomfortable.
“Well . . .”
“Because I’m a girl? Is that it? My delicate flower sensibilities won’t be up to negotiating the inside of a secure facility with inmates that are, btw,heavily guarded?” He opened his mouth to speak then thought better of it and shut it again. Sensible man. “Do you think I haven’t been to this prison before? I go every month, you tosser.”
I was done with this conversation so I skirted around him and made for the entrance. When he went to follow me, the guards at the gate stopped him and asked if he had a visitors pass.
“I’m with her,” he told them.
“I’ve never seen that man before in my life,” I said as I breezed through the gates, and they locked behind me. I caught his glare before I turned the corner away from his view and returned it with one of my own. Just another man thinking he knew better than me, thinking he could control me.
*****
Barclay
“She what?” I gripped the phone so tight that I could hear the plastic cover creak and had to force myself to loosen my hand – the last thing I needed was to have to replace yet another phone. “Why the fu– I mean, why aren’t you with her?”
“They wouldn’t let me in and she pretended not to know me.”
Sweat broke out on my neck as I pictured tiny Kira, her brightly coloured hair and her fairy movements sticking out like a bird of paradise in the grey prison environment. Surely she’d cause a riot? Who thought it was a good idea to send her for the genitourinary checks those guys needed?
“Get. Her. Out,”
“I have a fair few skills,” Sam returned in a dry voice. “Breaking into a maximum-security prison is not one of them. Anyway, she tells me this was always part of her job description. Apparently, she goes every month. How did you not know that?”
I sat down heavily in my leather desk chair and let my head fall into my hands. The reality was that I knew next to nothing about Kira’s actual job. And I was now convinced that Dr Tabard wasfullof shit. Kira had passed her postgraduate exams, even though she struggled with the academic side of things. Millie described her as determined and hard working. Dad’s account of her in action at work suggested thatshewas the competent one whilst Dr fucking Tabard was a bloody idiot.
When I really thought about it, Kira wasn’t flaky at all, not with the things that mattered. Not when she’d arranged huge charity events and all the work and organisation that they must have involved. Not even when it came to my brother: she’d made a commitment to Henry and she’d followed through, no matter how inconvenient for her.
She was never hung-over for work, never called in sick, always stayed late if her security team’s report was anything to go on. In fact, the only thing Kira seemed to be at all flaky about was her own safety. Something that I thought I had a handle on but, judging by the prison visit today, I’d been fooling myself. And now, because I was an unbelievable prick, I couldn’t evenaskher about the prison work, or about the problems she was having at the hospital. A wholly unfamiliar sense of powerlessness overcame me as I leaned back against the leather. I didn’t even have therightto ask any of these questions now, and when I should have been asking them, I had been sitting on my hands worrying about Kira being a distraction. Like she was some sort of negative influence. When actually, while we were together I had been less stressed, I’d slept better, I was happier and therefore more productive than I’d been in years. Yes, life with Kira was anything but easy, but in the most wonderful way.
I loved her.
It was pointless not to admit it now. Even if it wasn’t going to do me any good. And it killed me that she was hurt and I couldn’t comfort her. It killed me that there was something going on in her life (other than me being a total dick) that was upsetting her and I didn’t even have the right to ask her about it.
“Barclay?” I heard Sam ask in my ear and realised I’d been sitting in moody silence for a full minute. My mind flashed back to that smug smile Dr Tabard had given me last week and my back shot straight. I’d been an idiot not to look into that sooner, but first I had to do something about the situation at hand.
“Let me make a call.”
Chapter32
Job’s worth
Kira
“Alright, Gazza,” I said as I walked into the clinic room. Gary was the only healthcare assistant at the prison clinic and I relied on him totally. He knew the prisoners and had a way of interacting with them that put everyone at ease. Some of these guys were convicted of rape, domestic violence, assault and all sorts of violent crime. They were not to be underestimated. But a lot of them had mental health and substance abuse problems that meant an issue with sexual health was usually either put on the back burner, or forgotten about completely – until they were caged and realised what was going on. So, my clinics here were busy and Gary helped them be as streamlined as possible.
“Okay, short stuff,” he said. “We’ve got a motley crew for you today. Terry’s first up – wants his warts dealing with before he gets let out to his missus.”
After dealing with Terry and a couple of other regulars, we called in a new patient. He was huge – well over six feet and covered in tats.
“Hi there, Mr Oakdale,” I said as he lowered his massive bulk into the small plastic chair across from me.
“It’s Dave, doc,” he muttered.
