Page 20 of Wrong Turn, Right Bear
Thank gods I’d walked this path a thousand times and had all the talking points on a mental scroll. I said my bit, people responded, rarely with a question that I hadn’t heard and I answered. Normally I’d be fully engaged in the moment, but today I rattled off my answers.
By lunch time when we returned to the trail head and people were thanking me, one woman sidled up and asked if I was married. She had a nephew who I’d be perfect for. That wasn’t new. My human clients were often trying to match me with their son or next door neighbor.
“I’m not but I just came out of a serious relationship and I’m not ready to date.” I avoided looking at Theo. Our relationship lasted what… a day or two?
“I’m sorry to hear that.” She patted my shoulder and gave me a sympathetic smile.
Most of the group got into their cars and drove off. Romey corralled the ones who’d come in the van. Only Theo stood unmoving.
“Are you coming, sir?”
“I’ll make my own way back. Thanks.”
The van disappeared down the road. I kept my eyes on the spot where I’d last seen it because I didn’t want to hear what Theo had to say. If he stayed silent, I could pretend he’d changed his mind and wanted to be with me. But when he broke the silence, the last shred of hope I had, could be dashed.
“You came back.” Nothing like me stating the obvious.
“Yeah.” Theo’s conversational skills were worse than mine.
He wants to be our mate. Mark him. My bear didn’t understand the need for words and clarity.
“Why?” Now I’d have my answer whether I wanted it or not.
Theo studied his feet. “I don’t have my boots.”
A sharp pain stabbed at my belly. He hadn’t said the words. Instead he was avoiding my question.
“I’ve got them and I could have posted them to you.”
“They gave me blisters. Not sure I want them back.”
“That was your fault, Theo.” Hmmm, accusing the man I wanted more than life itself that he was wrong wasn’t the best or most direct way to his heart. Instead, I’d taken a detour, got a flat and had no spare.
“Thanks for pointing that out.” There was an edge to his voice and I apologized. His shoulders slumped as if my apology had pricked his anger and now his emotions were laid bare.
His voice wobbled and he glanced away. Shit, I’d made him cry. No wonder he didn’t want me. I was a horrible person. It didn’t matter that he rejected me but I had to hug him, tell him he was a great guy and that it would all be okay.
I opened my arms and he fell into them, sobbing on my shoulder. The hurt poured out of him in those salty tears. Maybe I should cry some more though I’d done little else since he left.
“I’m sorry,” he wailed and sniffed.
“No. Your heart told you we weren’t a match. You put yourself first, Theo.”
He pulled away, still blubbering. “But I don’t want to.”
That didn’t clear anything up. He didn’t want to be my mate. That I understood. Or he didn’t want to puthimself first. That made no sense and I would refuse if he did it just for me.
“Okay.” I waited, hoping he’d fill me in. But if this was the last time we met, another last as we’d already at least one, I took advantage of him being in my arms. I inhaled his scent, relished his smooth skin under my touch and his heart pounding against my chest.
“I missed you. I couldn’t sleep. Cereal was all I ate. You were in my thoughts and also here.” He patted his chest. “I couldn’t get rid of you and it hit me that I didn’t want to.”
He gulped in mouthfuls of air while his eyes bored into mine.
“I don’t know if this is what love is—I’ve never really been in love before—but I want and need you in my life.”
Now my heart sped up at hearing his declaration. But I had to clarify. “Are you saying you want to be my friend, my lover, or my mate?”
I stayed still, not even breathing, a trait only shifters had, though I couldn’t maintain it longer than a few minutes.
