Page 4 of An Arranged Marriage with a Mad Marquess
The nausea surged anew, the scents wafting from the breakfast table causing him to feel a wave of revulsion. He bent forward in his seat, clutching the back of his chair in a vain attempt to steady himself, yet it proved futile.
He tumbled to the ground, feeling as though he were falling for a very long time. Distantly, he heard Cynthia give a cry of alarm.
“Fetch Harry,” Emma said, voice muffled.
For the second time that morning, Neil found himself sprawled out on the floor, limp as a wilted flower. He wasvaguely aware of Cynthia’s skirts shuffling past, her shoes tap-tapping on the ground as she hurried to find Harry.
With considerable rustle and crumpling of her gown, Emma knelt beside her son. Neil blinked up at her, seeing two images of his mother’s concerned face.
“I’m going to die, Mama,” he said, jaw heavy and tongue thick in his mouth.
The face lurched and blurred until he could not read her expression anymore.
“Do not say such words. You must fight, Neil. I cannot bear the thought of losing you. You are everything to me. Pray, have faith and keep strong. Remember that you are the very essence of our family's future. You are not merely an obstacle in Clayton’s pursuit of honour, you have a legacy to carry forth. An heir must rise from you, a son who will carry on what is rightfully yours.”
He squeezed his eyes closed. Even if that did not help the spinning.
“Who’d marry me, then? I can’t blame any woman of thetonfor not wanting to marry a madman and become a young widow. Enough talk of my health – and of father’s sickness – has escaped these walls to deter most sensible ladies. And the ones that wouldnotbe deterred would doubtless make for a poor Marchioness, don’t you think?”
Emma hesitated a moment, small white teeth latching onto her lower lip. As always, she took a long time to answer, gathering her thoughts and choosing her words with care, like picking fruit from a high tree.
“Then we must lower our gaze,” she said at last. “We have been looking among the highest in the land, which is your birthright. However, it is true that there are flaws to what you can offer, Neil. It is not your fault.”
“I never said it was,” he managed, keeping his eyes shut.
“We shall look in lower-ranked families. Tradespeople, perhaps. Fallen members of theton lack sufficient dowryto tempt a decent gentleman otherwise. There are plenty of people in Society with decent breeding and enough money to make a respectable match. Generally, ladies in lower circles would never dream of catching a Marquess, and if the opportunity does come their way…” she trailed off meaningfully, cocking her head to one side. “They will be willing to overlook a few small issues.”
“Like their husband slowly but surely going mad?” he managed, with a harsh laugh. With his head pressed against the floor as it was, he could hear the drumming of approaching footsteps, both Cynthia’s thin-soled slippers and Harry’s heavy boots. He wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed and sleep. Of course, there was a great many things between himself and his bed at that moment. Stairs, for one. Getting up from the floor, for another. Both seemed like insurmountable obstacles.
It’s not fair for my mother and sister, living through this horror with me every day,he thought tiredly.How can I condemn a wife to it? What if I go mad and then simply don’t die? What will happen to her then?
And then he conjured up an image of Clayton as a child, his boot hovering above Harry’s still-spinning top, a grin on his face.
Clayton, don’t! It’s the only one I have!Harry bleated, but Clayton only grinned wider and brought down his foot with a crunch.
“I suppose I can’t let Clayton be Marquess,” Neil heard himself say, his voice thick and drowsy in his ears. “It would be an unmitigated disaster. If you can find a woman willing to have me, Mother, I shall marry her.”
Something like relief crossed Emma’s face. She leant down, pressing a kiss to Neil’s temple. Oddly, it seemed to soothe the headache a little.
“That’s my brave boy,” she whispered, much as she had when he was a small child and scraped his knees. “I shall find a suitable companion for you, just you wait.”
Neil let himself drift off into unconsciousness, his last thought bouncing around his head like a spinning top.
I doubt it.
