Page 43 of A Lady's Propitious Match
Clara felt the weight of their expectations, the suffocating sense of duty, and the stark realization that her ruse was going to really affect all of her family. So much so that there might not be any coming back from this.”
She steeled herself, knowing that the storm unleashed in the breakfast room was only the beginning of the challenges she would face in navigating the treacherous waters of societal expectations and familial aspirations.
She wanted away from Simon, but she did not want to lose her family in the process.
***
Alone in the sanctuary of her bedchamber, Clara crumbled beneath the weight of her family’s expectations and the harsh demands of societal norms. The sobs that wracked her body seemed to echo the tumult in her heart, a heartbreaking crescendo of emotions that threatened to engulf her.
The prospect of ending things with Christopher, a man she had come to care for deeply, pierced her soul with a pain that cut to the core. Her vision blurred through a veil of tears as she recalled the shared laughter, stolen glances, and the genuine connection that had grown between them.
She could not be alone with these thoughts. She could not stomach the way that they made her feel. Since there was no one in the house that she could talk to right now, she knew that she had to leave.
Right now, she needed the advice of her beloved sister. Sophia had tried to speak with her when they were at her home for dinner, but Clara had been unable to be honest.
Now though, she could travel alone and have her sister listen to her.
Spontaneously, and because she did not wish to spend the whole day crying in her bed chambers, Clara left in a hurry. It felt like no time at all before the rhythmic tap of her gloved fingers against the wooden door echoed the anxious beat of her heart.
The butler took one look at her tear stained face and asked no questions. He immediately invited her inside and took her to the drawing room where her sister was already seated.
“Oh my,” Sophia exclaimed the moment she set eyes on her sister. “Clara, what has happened? We need some tea immediately, could you arrange that for me please?”
As soon as the butler left, Clara embraced Sophia hard, finding it more challenging than she thought she would to actually get the words out.
“Come on, take a seat with me,” Sophia insisted. “Let us talk.”
With a heavy heart and a myriad of questions swirling within, Clara found herself on the precipice of vulnerability. Where did she begin? What question was most important to her?
“Sophia,” Clara began, her voice carrying a tremor of uncertainty, “how did you cope? How did you find the strength to embrace a marriage devoid of affection, based on status and alliance? I have always wondered that.”
Sophia’s eyes, filled with a mixture of understanding and empathy, met Clara’s gaze with a depth that spoke of shared struggles. The question lingered in the air, a delicate thread connecting the present to Sophia’s past.
Taking a moment to collect her thoughts, Sophia leaned back in her chair, a thoughtful expression on her face. “It was not easy, Clara. In the beginning, the prospect of a marriage arranged for status and alliance felt like a weight on my shoulders. James and I were strangers, brought together by circumstances beyond our control.”
“Yes, I remember,” Clara whispered, wishing that she had paid more attention to what was happening when Sophia was courting. But it felt like something that was a million miles away from her at the time. She was not thinking.
Sophia took a sip of tea, the porcelain cup cradled in her hands. “But with time, I learned to see beyond the societal expectations. James, despite the constraints of our arrangement, has proven to be a good gentleman at heart. He has shown kindness, understanding, and a genuine desire to make our marriage work.”
Sophia’s words held a quiet strength, a testament to the resilience that had defined her journey. Clara listened intently, sensing the unspoken complexities beneath Sophia’s composed exterior.
“As we navigated the challenges of life together,” Sophia continued, “something unexpected happened. Care blossomed, and over time, I found a deeper connection with James. It may nothave started with the fervor of love, but it grew into something meaningful as we built our relationship, brick by brick.”
Clara’s heart absorbed Sophia’s story, the realization that love, in its many forms, could bloom even in the most unlikely of circumstances. She tried to consider Simon in that way, but it was overwhelming. She just could not see it.
“But that is not what you came here to discuss, is it?” Sophia asked. “Not really. I believe you have something else to talk about. I can see it in your eyes. Just so you know, I have seen the scandal sheets this morning, so I know you are suffering drama. Is it about Mr. Fitzhugh?”
Clara could not hold back any longer. “Yes, it is.”
The delicate ticking of the clock in Sophia’s drawing room seemed to underscore the weight of Clara’s worries. As tears welled in her eyes, Clara took a steadying breath, the vulnerability emanating out of her.
“Sophia, I have real feelings for Mr. Fitzhugh. More than I could ever feel for Lord Caldwell. I know he has not got the title that our parents want for us, but I can not help how I feel.”
Sophia’s eyes, pools of understanding, widened slightly at Clara’s revelation. “Oh, Clara… that is a very challenging predicament that you find yourself in. I am sure that our parents are not at all impressed. I can only imagine what you have gone through.”
“Sophia, what am I to do?” Clara whispered, her voice laden with uncertainty.
Sophia held Clara at arm’s length, her gaze unwavering. “You are not alone, Clara. Regardless of how turbulent events may become, I will stand by you. Love, in all its forms, is a journey filled with challenges. And I believe, with time, the truth of your heart will find a way to shine through.”
