Page 54 of Undefeated Love
“That’s the way babies are usually fed.” Then she confessed, “He gets a bottle during the day when he’s at Maria’s, but I prefer to nurse him when he’s home with me.”
“The baby doesn’t belong to the girl who dropped him off?” he asked very slowly.
“No. Riccardo is my son.” Katlin watched Alex count months before his face turned pale.
“Was the IVF successful?” He swallowed hard. “Is he Jack’s baby?” Alex automatically dropped to his knees in front of her. “I don’t care whose baby he is. We’ll raise him though he were mine. I love you, Katlin. Since this baby came from you, I’ll love him, too.”
Katlin shook her head.
“Don’t tell me no. Kids need a father, and I’m going to be there for him.”
In Spanish she told him, “Sometimes you can be so dense, Alejandro Riccardo Lobo. Ric is your son.”
Alex sat back on his heels and stared up at her. “How? How did that happen?”
Katlin burst out laughing. “The normal way.” Taking pity on him, she explained. “As near as Dr. Rustlin and I could figure out, all the IVF pre-pregnancy drugs that Jack ordered while I was unconscious primed my body. Once they woke me up, we fucked like bunnies.”
“We never fucked. We made love.” He stared at the blanket as though trying to see through it. “May I watch?”
Nobody had ever seen her feed her son. Even during that first month while Abagale and Jaysun were helping, Katlin had always made sure to cover up. “Okay, but you’re going to have to move the blanket. My arms are a little full.”
Alex stood and pulled the small square blanket off his son and her shoulder. “He’s a cute little guy.”
The compliment went straight to her heart. “I’m glad you think so.” For some silly reason it seemed important to her that their child was appealing to him.
Alex moved back around to face her. “I want to be involved in our son’s life.” His tone had changed. “I missed watching you grow with him inside. I missed his birth and the first three months of his life. I don’t want to miss another day. He’s a miracle. Our miracle.”
“I know that I’ve robbed you of so much…but you have robbed us as well. If things had been different the night you escorted JJ to the premiere, starting with when I showed up in Los Angeles, you might have been there for all those magical moments that you missed.”
“I know. I can’t apologize to you enough, nor can I make it up to you.” He stroked the baby’s long black hair. “I guess we chalk those up to missed opportunities.”
“And miscommunication.” She grimaced. “Dr. Bowden and I have talked many long hours about communication. I should’ve called you before I left Miami and told you I was coming west. I just wanted to be with you. I missed you and being surrounded by all my friends and their lovers, I wanted to be with you.”
“And I should’ve explained that JJ had dumped her boyfriend a few days before that, and she needed a date.” Alex truly sounded regretful.
“My little temper tantrum as I walked out on you could have been attributed to off-the-charts hormones…not my TBI.”
Alex’s head snapped up as his eyes met hers. “You knew then?”
“Yes. I was going to tell y—”
“But I was a fucking ass to you.” His eyes brightened, then tears streaked down his cheeks. “This was your good news.”
Katlin couldn’t speak. She rolled her lips in between her teeth to hold back the flood of emotions that had threatened to release since that night.
He paused. “Did you ever listen to any of my voicemails? Read any of my text messages?”
“Finally. At Griffin and Grace’s wedding, Daniel gave me a copy of the whole video. During my sessions with Dr. Bowden, we listened to your voicemails and read your text messages. Then we finally watched the video together. She analyzed everything, every word, every tone, and then the body language in the videos.”
“Why didn’t you come home then?” Alex asked in a soft voice.
Katlin couldn’t look at Alex, so she dropped her gaze to the baby. “My mom.” Her voice broke so she tried again. “My mom lost several babies. Some before Daniel. Several between his birth and mine.” She sniffed back tears. “I was afraid if I lost the baby, you would never forgive me. So, I decided I’d wait and see if I carried the baby to full term. And to be sure he was born healthy.”
Alex looked as though she’d slapped him, or maybe gut punched him. “Is he…healthy?” Then he quickly corrected, “I don’t care if he isn’t…perfect. He’s mine and I’m going to love him from the bottom of my heart. We’ll give him anything he needs.”
“Whoa. Stop. Riccardo is perfectly healthy. Fact is, he’s in the upper percentiles for all of his development. As you can see, he’s a chunk.”
“Oh, Kat. I’m sorry you suffered through all of this by yourself, because of me.”
