Page 77 of A Duchess to Unravel
“Now that you have entertained a silly old woman, shall we get back to our original conversation?”
Theo smiled awkwardly as her shoulders rose up to her ears.
“Forgive me, Mrs. Mackenzie, I have completely forgotten what we were discussing,” she apologized. “My mind is … well it seems to be all over the place.”
Mrs. Mackenzie gave a single, firm nod and then curtsied.
“Very well, Your Grace, allow me to stop pestering you. I shall take to the tasks you’ve given me. Just one more thing. Steaphan is planning on roasted stuffed quail with root vegetables this evening.”
Theo’s brows rose in alarm, not at all sure what such tasks were and had already forgotten she’d given them. Still, she nodded, and said, “Yes, that sounds quite fine.”
“Would you prefer to have your dinner brought to your rooms or shall he set the table?”
Theo paused, thinking on it a moment. She adored Steaphan’s cooking and now understood why Alistair had taken such issue with English food. With him gone these last three days though,Theo’s appetite had faded again and she had not eaten the few meals that had been delivered to her rooms. Feeling the sudden urge to want to obey her husband’s command again, even with her lack of appetite and his absence nagging at her, Theo made her decision.
“I shall sup in the dining hall this evening,” Theo replied.
“Very well, Your Grace,” Mrs. Mackenzie replied, then took her leave.
Alone in the library once again, Theo eased back into the window seat cushions and stared out at the bucolic view that was the Caldermere countryside. She found herself searching for Alistair among the swaying fields and meadows, and once more, lost herself to her conflicting thoughts for the next several hours.
Theo was uneased by the flutter of happiness she felt when she walked into the dining hall later that evening and found Alistair already seated. He too, seemed startled to see her, and a clumsy smile touched his lips as he rose from his chair to greet her.
“You look well, Theo,” he said in greeting.
Theo felt her nerves stand on end. His eyes, as usual, had swept over in blatant appreciation. Yet their meeting felt stiff, wrong somehow, after all the intimate moments they had shared, for him to greet her with such awkward politeness. Still, she fought through the feeling and offered him a smile of her own.
“As do you,Your Grace,” she replied, adding emphasis on his title, hoping to settle them back to their usual banter.
Yet Alistair only chuckled stiffly and waved a hand toward the seat to his right.
“I did not know we would be joining one another for dinner,” he said after a servant helped her be seated.
“Neither did I,” she replied, feeling the tension between them grow. She chose to venture toward ending it.
“Though, I am quite pleased to see you again,” she added, her tone warm. “You have been busy, I take it?”
Alistair nodded stiffly as he lowered his eyes to his plate, focusing on the quail before him.
“Indeed.”
Theo waited for more. She had grown accustomed to Alistair explaining his days, allowing her to question what she did not know and offer suggestions on what she did. More never came, though. Instead, Alistair picked up his knife and fork and began carving his meat into small bites.
Theo watched him for a moment, wondering where her sudden feelings of worry and insecurity were coming from. He had not said anything dismissive or impolite, and yet she couldfeelsomething changed between them. Deciding to face the issuehead on, she picked up her own utensils as she said, “I feel as if something has changed between us.”
Alistair’s knife scraped suddenly against his plate, and he stilled. Even his chewing had stopped. She looked at him, her fork raised and poised with a speared bit of potato and waited until he raised his eyes to her. His swallow seemed forced, uncomfortable, then he sat down his utensils.
“How do you mean?” he asked.
Theo reached for the explanation she so very much wanted to say, yet could not bring herself to speak.
We were drawing closer to another. We were forming a bond of sorts. Now it has stopped. Why? What have I done wrong?
Feeling her bravery wane, Theo just shook her head.
“I do not know,” she said softly. “I just feel as if something has changed.”
Something like pity flashed in Alistair’s blueish-green eyes, but it quickly passed, and he offered a smile that seemed forced and not at all sincere.
