Page 14 of North
“You needed clothes.” I bought her a new coat and a pair of new shoes along with other necessities. The entire time we shopped, North’s big blue eyes lit up no matter how much she tried to hide it. Seeing her marvel over new clothes like they were a rich dessert she’d been deprived of struck me deep in my heart.
I could’ve sent her clothes.
Why didn’t I send clothes when she was with Izzy?
I tuned into the present moment when I heard North quietly laying out her new clothes. The entire bed was covered with potential outfits. A prideful smile quirked my lips up watching her pair tops and bottoms. She was in heaven and she was glowing.
Red tendrils fell down her back, swaying with her excited movements. My eyes sought out the single copper freckle nestled between the peaks of her cupid’s bow. She’d always hated having freckles on her lips so I used to tell her it was cupid’s way of making her the most beautiful girl in the world. Right then, standing in front of me that’s exactly what she was.
The most beautiful girl in the world.
“How about I order pizza before the shop closes?” I quizzed, taking a step back. If I stayed too long in her cherry-scented room, I’d be consumed. Denim eyes peered up at me from behind a deep smile and a veil of freckles.
“It’s only eight. What time do stores around here close?” She crinkled her nose and I saw a wisp of playfulness sift through her expression. I missed when she was like that.
“Eight-thirty,” I told her, taking another step back.
“Jesus. I have to get used to how slow-paced things are around here. I’d love some pizza.” I fed her off and on all day while we were out. I didn’t know if she realized the lunch I bought her at the coffee shop or the snacks I treated her to were ways of making her eat.
I never forgot what North’s favorite pizza topping was. Sausage and green peppers. I called in an order at the place ten minutes away from the house then decided to walk and pick it up. I had things brewing inside me that I needed to comb through.
The cold air bit through my layers of clothes and sliced through my thick jacket when I stepped outside. I felt winter’s icy grip but I was comfortable with it. Hell, I had to be living in the mountains.
Walking to the pizza shop should have taken about ten minutes but I was moving slower on purpose. I couldn’t stop thinking about how the day with North went once we aired out most of our grievances and decided to start over.
It felt like I found someone who understood the tangled parts of loving an addict. The merciless way it tears at your patience and altruism. The way it bends and bows your conscience causing you to excuse things you never would under normal circumstances.
North understood because she lived it the same way I did. I had no idea our minds worked so similarly until I spent the day talking to her over lunch. Until she shared some of her regrets and fears while we walked down aisles where she fingered soft clothes and pretty dresses.
I saw so much of myself in her.
I realized how much damage living with Izzy and taking care of her caused North over the past year. At least when I was there, she had a shoulder to lean on. She had someone who was walking through the fire shoulder to shoulder with her.
When I left she had no one.
I rubbed my forehead and stifled a disappointed groan in my throat. I was determined to make up for my own fear and selfishness. I needed to do it for North as much as I needed to do it for myself.
“Well, hello Mr. Fitzgerald.” A vaguely familiar voice spoke from the curb. I paused in my stride down the snow-covered sidewalk and looked over to see the blonde from the gallery leaning against her car.
“Melanie, right?” I asked aiming a pointer finger at her.
“Yup, that’s me. The one you turned down earlier.” She pushed her lips forward and feigned hurt feelings.
She did say she was new in town and Telluride wasn’t teeming with locals. I suppose I’d have to run into her at some point. I just didn’t expect it to be tonight.
“I had some family business to take care of. I didn’t mean to…” Before I could finish, Melanie was laughing with her head tipped back. Long blonde hair fell from her shoulders sweeping her mid-back.
“Kane, I was playing around. I understand. Your daughter comes first.”
I smiled politely and rubbed the back of my neck. After the moment North and I had where our ripe emotions flickered to life, calling her my daughter felt too small. Maybe once nerves settled things would fall back into the spaces they belonged.
“Hey, stop by the gallery whenever you have a spare moment. We’ll grab lunch or coffee or something.”
“I’d like that, Kane.” She moved away from the car and joined me as I walked. “I’m about to pick up dinner right now. Well, pizza and wings aren’t much of a dinner but my oven isn’t working.”
“I’m headed to the pizza shop too.” Her eyes lit up and she sped up her pace to match mine.
“Small town. That means we’re going to bump into each other many more times.”
