Page 82 of Bear
I looked at Cecily but she was still asleep. I wanted to ask if she recognized the second voice. I got out of bed and noted that it was still really fucking early in the morning. Five in the morning to be exact.
My father would be home by tomorrow and I was prepared but I still had no expectations. Things would either go according to plan, or nothing like I’d planned at all.
I swung my feet around and sat on the side of the bed for a moment soaking in the voices of the two women downstairs. It didn’t take long to recognize the second voice once my head was clear from sleepy fog.
It was Lane.
My mother.
I hurried into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt then I left the bedroom, closing the door behind me gently so I didn’t wake Cecily. I wanted to see Lane’s face for the first time after finding out she was my mother.
I wasn’t used to feeling nervous about anything but I imagined the buzzing feeling in my chest and stomach were nerves. One foot after the other, I pushed myself down the steps trying to figure out what I was going to say to this woman I’d seen through my entire life while not knowing she was my mother.
When I reached the foot of the stairs, I followed Luanne’s voice to the kitchen where she was putting away groceries with the help of her best friend. I stopped in the doorway and watched them for a second. Well, honestly, I was watching Lane.
Her dark hair was pulled up into a high bun on top of her head, making her look regal. Every time she smiled her deep brown skin glowed. I saw so much of my own features in hers but they were only accents. Nothing could ever take away the fact that I was Griffon Stone’s son. I was his spitting image right down to the burning copper eyes we shared.
Luanne noticed my presence first and her eyes widened. She tried her best not to look too startled but I knew what the look on her face was saying. She didn’t want me to mention anything to Lane about knowing she was my mother.
It was going to be one of the hardest things I ever did but I gave Luanne my word and I didn’t break my word. I’d wait to talk to Lane about being my mother. I’d wait until I dealt with my father and took my rightful place as kingpin of Louisiana. Maybe knowing he was out of both of our lives for good would ease the conversation between us since he was the only roadblock.
“Bear, I didn’t hear you come down,” Luanne smiled and walked around the island to give me a hug.
“What’s up, Luanne? Good morning, Lane.” I nodded in her direction and she lingered on my face for a while before greeting me in return.
“I brought Lane by to help me with all this food for your father’s coming home party. I hope you don’t mind.” She held my hands in hers and gave me a tight-lipped smile.
“Don’t let her fool you, Bear. I insisted on helping.” Knowing that she was my mother, I believed her. She probably wanted to see me once more before Dad came home and I didn’t blame her.
“It’s cool,” I said, grabbing groceries to put in the fridge. “Lane, long time no see. How have you been?”
“Oh, you know, I’m pushing through. Wow,” she said shaking her head.
“Wow, what?”
“Oh, um nothing. I’m looking at how much bigger you’ve gotten since the last time I saw you. You must live in the gym.”
“I do. Whenever I can’t sleep, I hit the weights. It helps tire me out,” I told her.
“I remembered you telling me you had insomnia. Is it still bothering you?” I watched her fingers curl into her palm while she stared at me. I could feel the urge pouring off her to touch my face or hair or something. I wondered how it would feel to have a mother’s touch you when you needed it. How it would feel to have that kind of love coursing through a simple touch. It made me wonder how many times Lane had touched me during my childhood just to have some part of me against her skin.
“It’s getting much better now. Ever since Cecily started staying here again I can sleep. She’s like an angel.”
Luanne shot me a look and I felt the side of my face heat. I knew she wasn’t totally on board with me and Cecily being together but she would have to ease herself into the reality because there was no way in hell I was leaving her daughter.
Lane smiled at me and I saw a flash of myself in the way her cheeks lifted and her lips curved. That’s great, Bear. I’m glad you’re able to sleep better now. You have to take care of yourself.”
“I’m trying.” I realized I’d put all the food away while talking to Lane.
“I’m going to get started on breakfast for you and Cecily then I’m going to clean and work on the food for your father’s party,” Luanne said. She moved around the kitchen and I realized she was trying to edge me out. Maybe I was looking at Lane a little too much. I couldn’t help it though. My mother was standing in front of me after years of thinking she was either dead or so far away she didn’t care about me anymore. It was surreal.
“Lu, I can start cleaning for you. I’m sure Bear can show me where everything is. After all, I came to help, right?” Lane flashed a smile then rubbed my back and guided me out of the kitchen before Luanne could protest. She was definitely my mother. She was smooth as hell.
We walked into the living room, far enough away from Luanne so she couldn’t hear anything. Once we were alone, Lane wrapped her arms around me in the tightest hug I’d ever experienced. I was nothing but shards before she touched me. Her hug was the glue pressing all my jagged, broken pieces together.
“Oh, Bear…” She inhaled sharply and ran her fingers through my hair. “I know you know who I am.”
“What? How do you know I know?” I blinked, trying to fight off the overwhelming emotions stirring deep inside me.
