Page 26 of Bear
“Nothing inherently wrong with that but I don’t think she wants to stay with us or she’d be there. She’s where she wants to be. You know she’s always felt safest with you, Bear. After losing Kaiden I think she’s shaken up. She watched that boy since he was two-years-old. She’s torn up.”
I felt even more like trash.
“Yeah, I know. I didn’t want her to be here alone while I went on my run to the lumberyard.”
“I’ll stay with her.”
“I think you should go home, Luanne.” Worry knitted my brows together. I’d never seen Luanne off her game before but she was starting to forget more and more and it was unnerving me. If nothing else was constant in my life, I knew I could rely on Luanne to have my back.
“I’m fine. Don’t you worry.” She stood up and looked at me with her hands anchored to her hips. She looked like Cecily when she did that. “You make it up to her. She’s a good girl and sometimes you can be harsh, Bear. You’ve got to remember that other people haven’t been through what you have. Everyone isn’t…”
“Soulless?”
“Now, Bear that’s not what I meant.”
“I know what I am, Luanne. It’s okay.” I stood up and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Keep her here for me, will you? I’ll be back tonight.”
I took a shower, got dressed in a pair of black slacks and a black and white striped button-down shirt. I left without a word to Cecily because I knew she didn’t want to talk to me. I’d hurt her feelings. I hated doing that. I didn’t want things becoming muddled between us though.
When she sat on my lap earlier and touched my face, I saw too many possibilities. I saw how beautiful she was inside and out. It made me miss something I wasn’t even aware of. It was the emptiest feeling in the fucking world and I hated it. I couldn’t unpack it because I didn’t know what the hell it was.
I pulled up to the lumberyard and killed the engine. Before I got out, my phone buzzed in the middle console. For a split second, I hoped it was Cecily. It wasn’t. It was my right-hand man, Ace.
“Yo, Ace. What’s good?” I knew if he was calling, something was going on. He never bothered me unless there was a problem he didn’t know how to handle. Ace usually handled problems with his pistol and dealt with the blowback later.
“We have a situation here in Baton Rouge,” he said quietly.
“I’m listening.” While I sat tucked away in the shadows, I watched my men fall into the lumberyard’s back entrance. Two of them were carrying the dead, frozen bodies of the guys from the butcher shop in long black bags.
“Two guys from Houston are fleeing police. They caught some heat for being reckless and getting a kid killed in their crossfire. They want to know if they can lay low in New Orleans or Baton Rouge. Said their uncle was one of your soldiers and they were told to ask you before they took up space in your territory.” My ears burst into flames.
“You know them, Ace?” I quizzed.
“Nah. Never fucking heard of them before.”
“Who’s their uncle?”
“Nick from the lumberyard.”
“Oh. He’s here tonight for overtime. I’ll talk to him and call you back. Do you have them in your sight right now?” I asked, stroking my beard.
“Yeah. They’re at the Baton Rouge warehouse.”
“Perfect. Keep them there.” I ended the call and walked into the lumberyard. There were only five men present for overtime. That’s all I needed. I normally let my soldiers handle the messy work but I needed a release I knew I wouldn’t find from fucking random women so I offered to load the frozen bodies into the sawmill. It was a huge machine that could have taken the trunks of a few trees at once so a couple of bodies was nothing.
“Bear, we’re suited up we can do it,” they offered. I turned to them, snapping my gaze to each of their faces.
“Did I fucking ask you to do it?” My voice was a low growl that made them hold up their hands in surrender and back away. I turned back to the sawmill and dragged the heavy, icy bodies onto the sawmill.
My muscles burned and my fingertips were numb by the time I hoisted them onto the moving track. I didn’t use gloves or protective eyewear because I didn’t give a fuck. I hit a button and a log slid onto the track with the bodies then the saws stared, vibrating the air and everything else around me. It didn’t take long for the saw to slice through the frozen bodies breaking them down into more manageable pieces.
“I’d stick around longer and help yall chop these motherfuckers up but I have to go handle some other business.” One of the bodies passed through the saw again and frozen flakes of blood misted the side of my face. “Nick. Meet me around front.” I watched body parts fall into the logging bin and lifted my eyes to the rest of the soldiers. The darkness of night blanketed them but I knew they were staring at me like I was a maniac.
I didn’t need to see their eyes to know what that feeling was. I’d dealt with that reaction most of my life.
“Make sure this shit gets cleaned up properly or else one of yall will be joining these assholes in the sawmill.”
“Yes, Bear.” They all nodded and got to work immediately. Nick followed me to the front of the lumberyard in silence. The only things making noise were the frogs croaking in the air and the bugs singing their songs.
