Page 25 of Bear
Beneath my ribs ached and something inside churned when I knew for a fact the space inside my chest should have been empty. I turned my face away from her, making her hands fall away. All I could see when I looked into her cognac eyes were rose petals turning black from being too close to an open flame.
I was the flame.
She was the rose.
I would destroy her petals if she touched me for too long.
As much as the savage inside me liked the feeling of her sitting on my lap, I knew I couldn’t let her stay there. Too many conflicts would arise. It was bad enough she pulled truths out of me like a priest in a confessional with a sinner. If she started pullingotherfeelings out of me I wouldn’t know what to do.
Cecily was my little sister. I was determined to protect her from everything she was starting to become curious about. I put my hands on her hips and moved her off my lap before standing up.
“I’m gonna take a shower and head out for this overtime. Tell Luanne she doesn’t have to make dinner.” I paused at the doorway and looked back at Cecily. Fuck, she was even more beautiful than I remembered. Something was happening and I didn’t like it. My temples jumped up and down every time I clenched my teeth.
“Okay…” She blinked a few times, no doubt removing the emotions building up in her eyes.
“Cecily, you should stay at your parents’ house tonight. They need to spend some time with you. I don’t know when I’m going to get back in.”
“You don’t want me here. Got it.” She tucked her lips between her teeth and gave me a curt nod before pushing past me and rushing downstairs.
Shit.
What was with all the goddamn activity in my chest whenever Cecily was upset? I never chased after anyone before in my fucking life. I never chased the ice cream truck when I was little so running behind anything was foreign to me.
I ran after her though.
I caught her at the bottom of the steps and gripped her shoulders, digging my fingers in. “Cecily,” I said, pinning her against the wall. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yes, you did. You never say anything you don’t mean, Bear. Been around long enough to know that.”
“I don’t want you here alone waiting up for me…that’s all.”
“You also said you’d let me climb in bed with you if I had nightmares after I told you how much being around you meant to me. But whatever, Bear. I should have realized that I actually got you to talk about feelings a little bit so you were bound to pull away.” The way she scoffed burned me. I let her shoulders go and took a step back.
“You are more than welcome to stay, Cecily. You know that. I’ll understand if you’re gone when I get back though. I-I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” The words tumbled from my lips like awkward clunky wooden blocks. Cecily walked away from me and I didn’t know what to do or say.
I was used to forcing interactions with people when they wouldn’t speak to me. I was used to violence as a means of getting my way. I couldn’t trample all over Cecily though. Even if I wanted to, she eluded me. It would be like trying to stomp on music, and if Cecily were music she’d be jazz. Something I could never stomp on because I admired it too much.
Luanne walked around the corner in time for her angry child to pass by like the breeze of an approaching storm. She looked at Cecily before she disappeared into another room then she looked at me and raised her eyebrows.
“You two don’t seem okay.”
“Yeah…” I rubbed the back of my head and sighed. “I think I fucked up, Luanne.”
“Now, Wolf…you know I don’t like you cursing. You’re so young.” She shook her head at me, her brown eyes seemed so far away. My face warped into a frown.
“Luanne, you feeling okay?” I took her hand in mine and walked with her into the study.
“I’m fine. I just forgot my mind for a minute, Bear.” She smiled but I wasn’t smiling. “Sometimes it happens when you get older.” She rubbed my hand.
“You’re not that old, Luanne. You’re only fifty.”
“I’m old enough to have silver hair.”
“Nothing but strands of knowledge, right?” I winked at her and she laughed.
“Exactly. Now, what happened between you and Cecily?”
“I told her she should stay with you and Mr. Paul tonight.”
