Page 1 of Bear
BEAR
(Twelve years old)
White sandcastles and naked fairies.
That’s what filled my dad’s warehouse.
Well…
That’s how I used to picture the warehouse when I was too little to know what was going on. Now, I knew that the white sandcastles were mounds of cocaine, heroin, and PCP and the naked fairies were women who worked for my father that he didn’t trust enough to wear clothes. Sometimes, I still liked thinking about things the way I did when I was little though. It helped to soften up the reality that my dad was the biggest drug dealer in Louisiana and he pulled major weight in Texas too.
Once I turned twelve, he let me into the warehouse closest to home. He wanted his three sons to take over the family business when he was dead or locked up. Being the middle child meant I was second in line for the throne. My older brother, Hawk was first and my little brother Wolf was last. Dad always said he hoped it never came down to Wolf having to run things because he was hardheaded and impulsive.
Once I got used to being in the warehouse and seeing how things operated, Dad let Hawk take me along with him when he went to monitor business. I liked going with Hawk more than Dad because he let me touch the drugs. The past few times we’d gone to the warehouse together, he let me weigh cocaine. He said it was the least dangerous out of all the drugs being handled.
Hawk even gave me a job to do while I was there with him. I had to keep track of the bricks and bags being sealed up by the naked fairies. I counted those bags like my life depended on it. If my count was off it would be trouble for everyone. Hawk would get chewed out by Dad and it would trickle down to me.
I hated the way my father treated Hawk when he screwed up. Sometimes it got violent and bloody. I wasn’t scared of anything in the world. I’d been raised not to fear a soul but my dad put the fear of God in my heart. One time I watched him shoot Hawk in the shoulder for letting his girlfriend, Joelle, sample the products a little too much.
To be fair, it was Hawk’s own fault. He knew his girlfriend was a junkie. We all knew it. He tried to hide it from Dad but once drugs came up missing, there was no more hiding it. If Hawk didn’t come clean about Joelle stealing shit, Dad would have put the bullet a little higher and aimed for Hawk’s head. He didn’t play when it came to loyalty.
Either you were loyal or you were out to kill him. That’s how my father operated. There was no in-between. After he shot Hawk in the shoulder, I overheard them talking. I had a bad habit of sneaking around our house and listening to whatever conversations I could. It was my way of gaining information and always knowing what was going on.
Dad told Hawk that if Joelle touched his products again, he’d take his head off. My gut twisted because I knew he was telling the truth. My father didn’t do empty threats. I breathed a little easier when I heard Hawk tell Dad he’d break up with Joelle though.
In the bagging area, I walked past a group of women taking a cigarette break even though they knew damn well Dad didn’t want them smoking inside near his product. I slowed in my stroll and looked at them. All different shades of brown with varying titty and ass sizes. That’s what they thought I was looking at because they smiled at me and blew kisses my way.
I didn’t care about them being naked as much as I cared about them breaking Dad’s rules. He was swift and unforgiving. I was okay with seeing grown men get killed but I’d never seen Dad kill a woman and I didn’t want to.
“Hey, y’all need to take that outside,” I said. My voice wasn’t fully mature yet but it carried enough bass to get my point across. The women looked at me like I was crazy but they must not have known who they worked for.
“Chill out bear cub. It’s just a quick smoke break.” One of them blew a stream of gray smoke in my face then touched my chin. “If you keep it between us…I’ll give you your first taste of real pussy.”
“Or at least a little head. So far, the men in this family seem to be carrying heavy weight and not just the drugs.” They all laughed amongst themselves and I shook my head. The thought of getting to fuck a grown woman was mildly interesting but not enough to get in trouble over it. I walked away in the middle of their laughter to find Hawk. He was the one on duty, so he’d have to deal with them.
I made my way through rows of stainless steel tables lining the warehouse walls and creating aisles along the open area of the floor. Whenever Hawk wasn’t on the floor making sure the drugs were getting bagged and sealed, he was in the back where the small, windowless offices were.
I walked down the dimly lit hallway and stopped at the first closed door. When I turned the knob and walked in, I saw my big brother behind Joelle, slamming against her while she moaned like she was hyperventilating.
I’d never had sex before but I knew and saw enough to know what was going on. “Shit, Hawk! Why didn’t you lock the door?” I shouted at him from the other side.
“My bad, Bear…” I listened to the rushed shuffling around on the other side of the door while I shook my head. Was it so hard to stick to the business like Dad asked?
“You know you should have knocked though, right?” He smirked at me and tousled my short crop of locs. I cringed because I had no idea where his hand was moments before.
“I thought you were done with Joelle, man.”
“Yeah, me too. Then she sent me a picture wearing…that.” Joelle walked out of the office fixing her crop top and adjusting the twisted fabric of her skirt. Nothing was covered. Her golden-brown ass cheeks peeked from under the hem of her skirt before she pulled it all the way down. She winked at me and leaned over to give Hawk a kiss.
“I’ll see you tonight, right?”
“Yeah, baby. Tonight.” Hawk slapped her ass and watched her walk away, swaying her full hips. “Don’t tell Dad,” Hawk warned once Joelle was out of sight.
“You might want to escort your junkie girlfriend out of the warehouse before Dad’s merchandise comes up missing.” My voice was even-toned but inside I was scared for Hawk’s safety if Joelle took it upon herself to steal something. Seeing my father shoot my brother left me a little shaken up.
I’d never tell anyone though.
Well, I told Luanne, our housekeeper, but she was like a mother to me in the absence of my own mom. She kept my secrets. She was the only one who knew what I was afraid of even though the list wasn’t long.
