Page 44 of Defect
“Yeah. She might actually let me come work with you so let’s not push it,” I laughed.
“Oh god, I don’t want to make her angry,” she rolled her eyes and I smiled at her.
“I’ll see you later, beautiful.” I leaned over the driver side and looked at her face one more time before she left.
“You have to stop calling me beautiful,” she told me.
“Why?” I touched the soft hair behind her ear then pulled my hand away.
“Because I’ll smile the whole way home like an idiot.”
“Okay. No more beautiful. I’ll see you later, gorgeous.” I tapped the top of her yellow tin can and she laughed before throwing it in reverse and backing away.
She was gorgeous. I didn’t see anything wrong with letting her know every chance I got how perfect she was. I waved as she drove down the street and she honked the horn right before she turned the corner.
I looked around outside and saw kids riding their bikes and playing. I knew that meant I needed to get my ass in the house before trouble came looking for me. I knew I wouldn’t back down and I could end up seriously hurt as a result.
Once I was in the house, I checked my phone and saw I had four missed calls from Mom. I groaned knowing she was going to lose her shit because I didn’t answer her. I didn’t feel like talking to her though. She didn’t have anything positive to say and I noticed every time I was around her, my energy dropped and I felt like I was on fire with anger. I didn’t like feeling like that.
I’d deal with her wrath when she came to pick me up. I thought I’d have time to prepare myself before I had to look at her and see the hatred in her brown eyes. I didn’t. Twenty minutes after I got in the house, the key turned in the lock.
“Ezra!” She called out.
“I’m up here.” I grabbed the photo collage and headed down the steps.
“Did you get your brother’s room packed up?”
“I did.” I walked past her and went straight to the car. She could inspect it herself. Whatever she didn’t like wasn’t my problem. I was done with that room. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I had to do it though because there was no other way for me to tell him goodbye. I was glad I had Solo by my side when I did it.
“You didn’t take the boxes out of the room,” Mom said when she came out to the car.
“I’m not going to. I did what you asked me to do. You’re going to have to figure out how and when to get the boxes out. I’m not doing that shit.”
“I don’t know why you think you get to tell me what you are and are not going to do but when I ask for your help, I expect to get it.”
“You did get it. I’m not going back into that room. Do you even care how that made me feel?” I looked at her because I wanted a real answer. I wanted the fucking truth for once and I wanted to see if she’d give it to me.
“I know it was hard.” Her words were tight and short like quick drum taps.
“Why did you make me do that alone then? You dumped me right back into a world of pain and left me without making sure I was okay.”
“You’re clearly okay.”
“I wasn’t though. I wasn’t okay.” My tongue burned to tell her how I had to call Solana over to help because my own mother left me.
“You’re fine.”
“I’m okay enough to do manual labor but I’m not okay enough to work on my own and get around by myself?”
“Ezra, we are not going to do this right now. You didn’t talk to those doctors at the hospital. You didn’t see what you looked like after that accident. You didn’t have to walk around on pins and needles wondering if your son was going to be a vegetable or not.”
“All of that is over. We’re talking about right now. You need to let me be a man. Stop acting like I’m incapable of taking care of myself.”
“Youareincapable! You don’t see it the way I do. I’m your mother. I know what’s best for you and you need to be looked after. You’ve already landed yourself in jail and back in the hospital. You really think you need to take care of yourself? You are not normal. You’re broken pieces of what you used to be. I don’t know who the hell you are now but you’re not the Ezra I gave birth to.”
“This is why I blow up on you all the time. Because you say shit like that. How is that supposed to make me feel, Ma?”
“It’s not about how it makes you feel! It’s about what the truth is. The truth is…you aren’t as smart and capable as you think you are. I don’t even know about you having the job our neighbor offered you. She doesn’t know you. She doesn’t know your limited abilities.”
