Page 86 of Defect
Ezra: You’re not going to tell me what’s going on until I’m done, are you?
Me: No.
“Let’s go, Solana! What the fuck are you sitting in the car for? I see you’re still slow as fuck,” Vince grumbled, making me jump. I looked in the backseat at Malachi and forced a smile.
“Come on, Tyke. Let’s get this over with, okay?”
“Yeah. Okay,” he sighed. I got out of the car and opened the door for Malachi and we held hands all the way to the restaurant.
“Walk in front of me. I want to see what I’ve been missing all these months.” Vince waited for me to walk past him and I did so self-consciously. I felt the grease from his stare sliding down my back and I hated it. “Jesus, girl. You sure you don’t want me back in your life?”
“I think the restraining order we’re currently violating confirmed that, Vince.”
“Oh, that’s right. You did have a fucking restraining order put on me, didn’t you? You see how well that worked?” He laughed and spoke to the host about seating us outside. My stomach buzzed with nerves that made me nauseous. I was in no mood to eat.
He can’t hurt you or Malachi in public, Solana.
We were led out to the beautiful patio but I couldn’t concentrate on the scenery right then. I was too busy looking at how skinny Malachi was and how dirty his hair and clothes were. I wanted to punch Vince in the fucking mouth.
“What can I get this little cutie to drink?” The waitress bent down and smiled at Malachi. He smiled back but slid closer to me, locking his arm with mine. He was terrified. I could feel it all over him.
“Nothing. We’ll let you know when we’re ready to order,” Vince smiled and the server nodded, letting the smile drop from her face.
“Can he get a water please?” I asked she before she left our table.
“Of course,” she found her smile again and then walked away.
“Vince, you aren’t going to sit here and eat in his face and not feed him.” Anger took over the fear and my body stiffened.
“Fuck him. He doesn’t need to eat. That’s all he cries about. That’s why I can’t sleep at night. All I hear is him whining through the walls about being hungry.”
“Then maybe you should fucking feed him!” My voice spiked in a way I wasn’t expecting. Vince glared at me then cleared his throat and chuckled, baring perfect white teeth.
“Lower your fucking voice, Solana. Act like a lady, okay?” I smoothed imaginary wrinkles from my shirt and nodded. I hated the way I fell right back into the battered mindset I had when I was with him. How much had I really overcome if he still triggered the same reactions in me?
“Here’s your water, little man.” The server appeared bright and cheery, sitting a kid’s cup beside Malachi.
“Thank you so much,” Vince said. He was charming whenever anyone else was around but I could tell our server got an uneasy vibe from him. She was right. If only she knew what a monster he really was. “We’re ready to order.” He straightened his tie and closed the menu. “She’ll have the apple smoked pork chop and I’ll have the filet mignon.” My eyes grew wide and I shook my head immediately.
“No. Absolutely not. I’m vegan. Can you bring me a salad and water with lemon? Thank you.”
“Sure thing. What about for the little one?” She winked at Malachi and he smiled a little.
“He’s not hungry. Besides, if he orders, he won’t eat it. You know how kids are.” He grinned then took the menu from my hand and handed it to her. She laughed politely then walked away, leaving Vince to shoot daggers at me from across the table.
“You’re going to eat whatever the fuck I tell you to eat, Solana. I don’t give a damn about you being a vegan.” His voice was low so that only I could hear him. He made my fucking skin crawl.
“I’ll get sick if I eat meat. You know that.”
“Good. You need to be sick after the way you left me. You’re so inconsiderate.”
“I had to leave or you would have killed me.”
“I’d never kill you. You’re the love of my life. You know it. Now, tell me how the fuck to get my rights terminated. I looked into legally signing them away because I don’t want to be a father. Everything about him ruins my goddamn life.” I’d never seen a parent look at their own child with such disgust. My heart broke for Malachi. He sat there unfazed like he heard those things all the time.
“You can’t legally sign away your rights in California. I’ve checked. Trust me. I can petition to bring you to court though. Then they can decide if your rights should be terminated.”
“Fuck that. I’m not going to court over this little motherfucker. Find another way. I want him out of my life. All he does is mess everything up.”
