Page 120 of Margot
“I don’t fucking care. I need some answersnow. This is going to drive me nuts.” I put on a sundress and combed my hair in the mirror until it behaved then I looked at Lennox. “Come on, I want you there too since Margot told you everything.”
“Sutton…”
“Please, Lennox. I’ve never felt so much sadness before and it’s eating me up.” He sighed a little and his shoulders dropped.
“Okay. I’m coming.” He got up and went to the bathroom and I rushed into the living room. While he got dressed, I made us travel mugs of coffee to kill the time.
I drummed my fingers on the counter, playing the imaginary piano beneath my hands. I tried not to think about Margot but I couldn’t help it. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t feel her anymore and she wouldn’t answer me.
It was jarring.
“Okay, I’m ready. Let’s go,” Lennox grabbed his keys and I handed him a mug of coffee then we left.
“Was she sad?” I asked as he drove down street after street.
“Very,” he nodded. “She said to tell you her leaving wasn’t personal and that she loved you so much and was proud of you.”
“Fuck. Why did she just…vanish?” I nibbled on my lip and looked out of the window.
“It was time, baby.”
“It seems so sudden.”
“She said she’d been getting further and further away lately. I don’t think this happened all of a sudden.” I thought about his words and realized he was right. Margot had been slipping away gradually over the weeks. She seemed so far away and I’d been in control more and more.
Shit.
I never even noticed it.
Lennox pulled into the parking lot and I was out of the car before the engine shut off. I hauled ass into the building and stopped at the front desk. The woman sitting there looked at me with wide eyes.
“Can I help you, Mrs. English?”
“Is Dr. Adler in?”
“Yes, she is. She’s meeting with someone. Can you have a seat? I’ll let her know you’re here when she’s done.”
“Sure. Can you tell her it’s an emergency, please?” I felt like I was barely holding it together. I sat in the waiting area and only looked up from my hands when Lennox came in.
“Is she going to be able to see you?” He asked. When he put his arm around me, I felt more at ease but it didn’t take away the sadness.
“I don’t know. She’s in a meeting.” My knee bounced incessantly until Lennox put a strong hand on it.
“Sutton, it’s going to be okay. Breathe.”
“I’m trying,” I told him. I was too. I tried to breathe deeply but I felt weird and vacant inside. I was so used to being able to talk to Margot and now she’d gone silent. At least before when she was silent, I could feel her. This time she was completely gone.
“Mr. and Mrs. English, Dr. Adler will see you.”
I hopped to my feet at the secretary’s words and rushed to Dr. Adler’s door. Lennox was right at my side placing his reassuring hands on my hips.
“What would I do without you?” I asked quietly.
“Lose your shit constantly without having anyone bring you back to earth.” He kissed my temple and I relaxed a little.
Dr. Adler walked down the hall, her heels clicking against the marble floor. She smiled at me happily. Her green eyes made me feel safe. “Sutton, Lennox. I do hope everything is okay. My secretary told me you had an emergency.” She opened her office door and we all went inside.
“Margot is gone,” I said before my ass even hit the couch. Dr. Adler went to her desk and retrieved her iPad then sat down in her chair.
