Page 50 of Nocturnal Sins
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Samira
Papa kept me on lockdown after Santana left the house. He had one of his men trail me every-fucking-where. He didn’t have to tell me, I could feel him stalking me wherever I went.
He even went as far as taking my phone so I couldn’t call or text Santana. I was living in hell. I missed Santana so much I couldn’t even see straight.
I kept my promise though. As long as he wasn’t welcome at home, I refused to talk to Papa. It made for one hell of an interesting graduation ceremony.
I made my speech as valedictorian without giving him a single glance or smile. When my name was called, I filed across the stage, took my diploma and went to my seat without acknowledging him in the crowd. Once everything was over, he yanked me by the arm to the grassy field where all the families were gathering for pictures, hugs, and gifts.
Through all the surrounding chatter, Papa’s voice rose above it. “Samira, this is ridiculous. You’re going to shun me on your graduation day?” His brows knitted tightly together as he drilled into me with his stare.
It was hard not to spew a million things at my father. I wanted to tell him how fucked up it was that he wouldn’t at least talk to us about our relationship so he could understand. I wanted to tell him that by freezing Santana out of my life, he made my life a living hell. It had been a week but it felt like years.
“Mija, I hate this shit. Please talk to me.” I never knew the silent treatment could crumble my father that way. He was jagged and hard. That’s always how I thought of him at least. I knew he loved Santana and me but I didn’t know we had the power to break him down. So when he looked at me with sad eyes and said, “You won’t talk to me, Santana won’t talk to me…I feel like my world is empty without you two.” It hit me a little harder than I expected. I didn’t show it though.
I tried not to let my lips tremble. I didn’t want him to see the tears begging to fall. I wanted him to feel how cold I was without Santana.
I turned on my heel and went to find some of my friends to take pictures with. Just to stall for time, I even took pictures with Erin. “You’ve been like a depressed Eyore lately, Sam, what’s up?” She asked once we were done using up all the Snapchat filters.
“Papa found out about my boyfriend,” I said.
“Oh shit. Did he kill him? Your dad always looked like the kind of guy that would cut someone without hesitation.” She laughed about it but my face was stone.
“He didn’t kill him. He forbade me to see him again though. I can’t sleep without him. It’s been really fucking rough.” I waved at a few kids calling out to me then looked over my shoulder to see if I could spot Papa. I hoped to God he would just leave.
“Aww, Sam. I’m sorry. Hey…I have an idea,” her brown eyes twinkled as she looked at me.
“What is it?” I asked with a raised brow.
“Come to my house. You can totally have your man come over and I won’t say a thing because I won’t be there. Kasey is throwing a huge party by the lake. My parents are gonna be at some retreat. They’re about to go home and pack up now so that means the house is all yours if you want it.”
All the irritation I had stored up toward Erin evaporated in a cloud of mist. I blinked a few times and looked at her with wide eyes.
“Are you sure?” I quizzed, teetering on the edge of hope.
“Yeah, of course,” she chirped. “I figured you wanted to be with your man instead of at Kasey’s party.”
“You’re so right.” I let my shoulders drop a bit and I hugged her. “Erin, I’m sorry for being bitchy toward you.”
“You’re fine. Just tell Santana to call me. Or better yet, tell him to come to Kasey’s party and my place is all yours.” Of course there was a catch and of course that catch was Santana. I fought off my eye roll and held out my hand for her phone. She grinned like a fox when she plopped it in my palm.
Me: Hey, it’s Sammie. I’m using Erin’s phone. If I text you an address will you show up?
Santana: Is this really Sammie? Tell me what happened on your fifteenth birthday.
Me: After my quinceañera, we snuck some of Papa’s liquor and stayed up all night laughing and talking about nothing.
Santana: Text me the address.
Butterflies took over my stomach, their wings beating rapidly. I handed Erin her phone after I deleted my messages to Santana and told her that he would try to come to Kasey’s party but I knew that was complete bullshit.
The only place Santana was coming was inside of me.
Erin made her way to Papa in the parking lot once the crowds died down, and begged him to let me come to the big party by the lake. “Everyone is going to be there Mr. Alvarez,” she whined and pressed her palms together.
Papa looked at Erin, then looked at me. “You want to go, mija? Then I want to hear you ask me.” He took a pull of his cigarette and turned his head so that he didn’t blow the smoke at Erin and me.
