Page 64 of Tortured Whispers
The ache in my chest spread to my shoulders and my spine. Suddenly the weight of the world was too heavy and gravity pulled me to the floor. Everything was spinning. Nothing stood still.
My own heart was spinning and beating wildly out of tune, making it impossible to breathe.
Cut, Brooklyn.
“Kill yourself, loser,” Ashley chanted. Her voice sounded so far away. I’d slipped into the water. I’d slipped into a trance.
I yanked my sleeves back and stared at all the scars littering my arms. “Yes! She’s gonna do it, guys. Look!”
All the scars. So ugly and fucking stupid. Just like me.
I pierced my skin and moaned from the pain. I was tired of being a fuck up. I couldn’t live knowing I ruined Caesar after everything he’d done for me. He deserved better than me. I was just a fuck up anyway.
With a steel grip on the razor, I let out a choked and garbled sound as I dragged the blade straight down, going deeper than I’d ever gone before.
Vertically.
Bright red surged out and I stared at it for a moment before moving to the other arm. I needed to make sure there was no coming back. Fuck ups didn’t deserve second chances.
So I sliced straight down my other arm too. I slid down on the floor while blood pumped with each beat of my sluggish heart. I could breathe again but I didn’t want to. Not anymore.
I couldn’t tell which was warmer, my tears or my blood.
“Fuck…oh my god. She did it. She really did it. There’s way too much blood. I gotta get the fuck out of here.” I heard the thumping of footsteps running away then nothing.
My hands were slick and sticky and crimson dropped from my fingertips. It wouldn’t be long before I finally let the water win the war. It could have me. I was done fighting.
A sob choked my throat as I lie bleeding out. Not for myself though. I thought of Cease. He would find me.
My arms were like cement as I reached up to my hair. I could barely move but I made sure I pulled out my hair tie before blackness stole me away.
Caesar liked my hair down.
**
Caesar…
A car that I’m guessing was Ashley’s ripped past me as I pulled into the driveway. Alarms sounded in my head once I saw the front door wide open and didn’t see Brooklyn standing there waiting for me.
She always waited for me.
I barely remember throwing the car in park before I was scrambling toward the house. My chest was weighed down with a heavy, unrelenting sense of dread. Nothing about the air in the house seemed okay.
“Brook!” I shouted. “Brooklyn!” I ran straight into our room and my world shattered into a million pieces. A sour taste invaded my mouth as I dropped to my knees.
My sweet girl.
She was covered in blood. Her wrists were shredded…vertically. She cut to kill.
But why?
I cradled her body in my arms and called 911 before I let the first sound out of my mouth. She was still warm. I felt the slow thump of a pulse. I didn’t have time to waste.
Once I knew an ambulance was on the way, dizziness swarmed me and hot tears bit my eyes. “Brooklyn, don’t leave me. Please,” I begged. My voice was thick with regret that I wasn’t there for her when she needed me most. “Brook! Please! Don’t you fucking die!” I pressed her frail body against mine as if I could gift her my heart so she could live instead of me.
My entire body felt too heavy to breathe or move or speak.
I willed time to speed up while I held her.
I looked around in sheer panic, trying to find something to apply pressure to her wrists with. Her lips were turning blue and warmth was leaving her rapidly. My teeth chattered as I reached over my head onto the bed and grabbed for something. Anyfuckingthing.
