Page 28 of The Payback Plan
His phone pinged then and he absently plucked it off the arm of the couch where he always placed it when he was sitting in this spot.
Here’s your latest from HAMSTER FACTS! Did you know that in the wild, the female kicks the male out of the burrow at completion of coitus? Little wonder when the event is over and done with in approximately four seconds. Press 1 if you think male hamsters need to be better lovers. Standard messaging rates may apply.
Oliver blinked, temporarily at a loss for words, wondering if today’s bot had been AI trained in feminism. Or whether his phone really was listening in to his conversations. Or possibly reading his mind considering how much theOutlanderdiscussion had him thinking about sex. And how very long it had been since he’d had any.
Four seconds? He’d be grateful to last that long if he ever got around tocoitusagain.
5
Paige was back in the café again the following Tuesday. She was the only customer, which was just as well given she’d just finished a FaceTime call with the Just Desserts gang, all laughing and joking over their mutual shenanigans.
Bella who was dealing with art gallery owner Chase and Astrid who was working on hockey superstar Aiden were kicking it, but she knew that Sienna had to play a longer game with Horrible Harvey.
She took a restorative bite out of her scone slathered with clotted cream and sipped her full cream milk coffee. Real milk, real cream. This pretending to be vegan thing was a lot harder than she thought it would be. And she hadn’t even lost weight from lack of gluten and practically every other joyous food known to man because she was pretty much existing on packets of crisps.
And visiting bakeries a little too often.
Glancing out the window, she spotted the dog from last week again. Two big brown eyes sitting atop a greying muzzle looking at her, his unkempt wind-ruffled hair whipping across his eyes. The dog still looked skinny and freezing.
‘Jiya,’ she called, keeping an eye on the animal that looked like it was now in a hurry to move on.
‘Yes, my bewdy?’
‘Does someone own that dog?’ A Border Collie around these parts surely had to come off one of the surrounding sheep farms?
‘He’s a stray. Been hangin’ around on and off the last couple o’ weeks. People have tried to take him in but he don’t seem to mind his own company.’
Paige nodded. But surely, he wouldn’t mind a little TLC?
The WI women approached the door then and the dog hurried off as they traipsed in from another blustery walk. It wasn’t raining outside but the wind hadn’t really let up all week and the sky while still grey wasn’tlowand grey. A couple of times it had even looked like the sun might poke its way through.
It hadn’tyet.But hey, she lived in hope.
‘Hi again,’ Dorry greeted as she approached and the others swarmed the counter.
Paige smiled. ‘Hey. Another fine Cornish day to be out walking, I see.’
The deep crinkles in the older woman’s face split into ravines as she laughed. ‘It’s what we call bracing around these parts.’
Grinning, Paige cocked an eyebrow. ‘So where did you come from, originally?’
‘Buckinghamshire born and bred. Married a tin miner, been here ever since.’
Sixty years, Paige recalled from their chat last week. ‘Bet you’re still not considered local, though, right?’
Another hoot. ‘Right.’ She glanced out at the sea front. ‘You should join us on our walk if you’re sticking around for a while.’
Paige also turned her gaze to the view. ‘In this? No way. This is red wine and log fire weather. Not walking around the streets weather.’
The dog suddenly appeared on the beach, dashing down to the tide line, running in and out of the shallows chasing the retreat of the waves, getting soaking wet and sandy.
‘Jiya says that dog’s a stray?’ Paige said. ‘Surely someone must be missing him?’
‘The vet scanned him when he first appeared a fortnight ago. She says there’s no chip and he’s not wearing a collar. Nor has anyone come looking for him either. She was going to take him to the shelter but he escaped when she had her back turned and he’s been a bit of a ghost ever since. Here one moment, gone the next. There’s been notices put in all the local surrounding villages’ Facebook groups but no one’s claimed him so far.’
‘Dorry.’Elizabeth’simperious voice travelled easily across the café.‘You’re up. Jiya doesn’t have all day.’
Paige swallowed down the urge to laugh out loud at the way Doris looked pointedly around at the empty café. ‘Coming, Elizabeth,’ she replied placidly before turning back to Paige to mouth, ‘Bossy boots.’
