Page 23 of Shelf-Made Man
Nine
Alfie fell asleep soon after breakfast. That was mostly a relief, in that it meant Tobias could postpone the Big Trollhood Reveal. And Alfie’s recovery from his nasty injuries also required the rest.
But it also meant that Tobias was mostly alone with his thoughts, and those thoughts weren’t pretty. He’d never been the type to question his identity or his life path. He could probably thank his mother for that. She’d provided him a depth of love and support that instilled confidence in both himself and the future, despite his challenges with social interactions.You’re you, had been her constant message,and you are capable and worthy exactly as you are.
Well, he’d appreciated that. He still did. But Mom wasn’t around anymore and he had nobody else to discuss his self-revelations with.
What did it mean that he was a troll? Was hedestined to turn brutish and cruel? Did he have a place in this world anymore? If not, did he have a place in Alfie’s?
Maybe Snjokarl’s minions would kill him and he wouldn’t have to worry about any of this.
“Are you all right?” Alfie sounded sleepy.
“Sure.”
“You groaned.”
Shit. “Just tired of being in the car. But we’re getting pretty close. Would be only about an hour if traffic wasn’t so awful.”
Alfie sat up straighter and peered outside. “Are there always so many vehicles?”
“Not at this time of day, I don’t think.” Tobias considered for a minute. “Christmas is in two days and today is Monday. A lot of people probably have the week off and are on vacation or on their way to visit family.”
Alfie didn’t respond right away. Then he said, “Ah. On top of everything else, I’m making you miss your holiday celebrations.”
Tobias couldn’t help barking a laugh. “There’s nothing to interrupt.”
“I see. Which winter holiday do you observe?”
“None.” Tobias was going to leave it at that, but then he feared that Alfie would ask how Tobias had managed to track him down. That story was definitely going to have to come out eventually… but not right this minute.
“Mom and I used to do several—Christmas,Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Solstice—but sort of in a low-key educational way. Like, we’d read some facts or folklore and eat something appropriate.” Stated baldly like that, it likely sounded dumb, but he’d enjoyed it a lot as a kid. It was fun finding out the different ways that people made a day special.
“I think I like your mother very much.”
That warmth returned to Tobias’s chest. It was becoming almost familiar. “Mom was a professor, so she always had a few weeks off around now. We’d drive down to visit Aunt Virginia. We’d all dress up and she’d have a spectacular meal catered. Then the next day Mom and I would do a road trip. Sometimes it was a big deal like Disneyland, and sometimes it was just poking around small towns or stopping at every beach on the coast.”
He hadn’t really thought about those journeys for a long time, expecting the memories to be painful. It turned out, however, that they were more sweet than bitter.
“How about you?” he asked Alfie. “Do you have a winter holiday?”
Alfie was quiet for so long that Tobias thought he might have fallen asleep. But when he risked a quick glance to the passenger seat, Alfie was awake and staring ahead. Finally he spoke, but in a monotone unlike his usual animated style. “Traditionally, the king hosts a party on the longest night of the year. Everyone who can travels to the capital, and there are drinks and food and dancing until the sun rises.There’s a lot of sex too—it’s that kind of night. When I was a child, however, my father would meet with Kol and me after the party—just after sunrise—in his private quarters. Just the three of us, you understand?”
“That didn’t happen often because he was king?”
“Precisely. But that morning there were no advisors or courtiers or servants. We ate little bits of food left over from the party, and Father would tell us stories and listen as we talked about whatever boyhood fancies we had at the moment. He would tell us that he was proud of us. For an hour or two, we were… an ordinary family.” Alfie heaved a heartbreaking sigh.
Tobias reached over for what he hoped was a comforting knee pat. Then he returned his attention fully to the road.
A few moments later, trying to keep his voice neutral, he asked, “Um, Alfie?”
“Yes?”
“Do trolls know how to drive?”
He was asking because a silver Dodge Ram had been riding his tail for the past several miles. It was fairly normal for California drivers to leave virtually no stopping distance between cars, but this guy was so close that the truck took up all of Tobias’s rear window. And when Tobias had carefully switched lanes—three times now—the Ram had switched right along with him. The most recent time, it had cut off another car so boldly that it received a flurry of angry horns.
Alfie, who probably saw Tobias glancingrepeatedly into the rear-view mirror, twisted around in his seat—which must have hurt—and groaned. “Oh no.”
