Page 13 of The Golem of Mala Lubovnya
6
“My parents tell me I’m foolish to be working in this weather,” Jakob said as they walked toward town at the close of another day. As if to demonstrate what he meant, he waved a hand, causing the drifting snowflakes to swirl and spin.
“You are. I see you shivering as you work.”
“Not much longer. Another week, I think, and the house will be finished enough that we can lay a fire inside.”
Emet tried to smile at that idea—and he did sometimes daydream about being warm again—but he dreaded finishing the house. He and Jakob would undoubtedly have finished already if the days hadn’t grown so short. “It’s a very nice house,” Emet said.
“It is. My finest work yet, I think. I’m going to carve an elaborate stone mantel that’s far too grand for such a small shack. I may carve the ceiling beams as well, although I don’t much enjoy working with wood.” He grinned boyishly. “My little house will be fancier than the duke’s by the time we’re done with it.”
We. Emet liked the sound of that. His fingers were much clumsier than Jakob’s, but perhaps Emet could learn to do some carving as well.
They came to the field with the goats. During lunch that day, Emet had stolen a few crusts of Jakob’s bread. As always, Jakob pretended not to notice. Now Emet gave the crusts to the hungry animals, who bleated their thanks after they ate.
“You’re spoiling them,” Jakob said, but he was smiling.
“They look hungry.”
“They’re goats. Goats always look hungry.”
“They do seem to enjoy their food.”
Jakob gave him a look Emet had grown used to—it meant Jakob was trying to puzzle something out. “You could try food sometime too, you know.”
Emet shook his head. Jakob had offered before, and Emet had been tempted. But by now he’d learned that after humans ate or drank, they excreted, and Emet didn’t think his body was capable of that. He pictured himself swallowing food and then having it remain somewhere inside him forever.
Jakob moved closer to Emet, so close they almost touched, and Emet could feel the radiant heat as if Jakob were a small fire. Jakob stuck out a finger and captured a single snowflake, which he held in front of Emet’s mouth. “Try this at least,” he said.
Obediently, Emet opened his mouth.
Even though the snow had probably melted already, Emet felt a dot of cold moisture on his tongue. It had no flavor. But Jakob’s finger—ah. Jakob’s skin tasted of stone and salt, and although Emet knew Jakob’s fingers were very calloused, the skin felt smooth against his tongue. He sucked gently. Oh, that was very nice. A little bit of Jakob’s body inside his own. Emet’s cock grew as hard as when he stroked it at night.
With a noise somewhere between a groan and a gasp, Jakob pulled his finger away and took an unsteady step backward. His eyes were very wide and his cheeks were flushed. “No,” he said, but Emet didn’t know what he was denying. And then Jakob’s gaze fell slightly and he moaned again.
Emet looked down at himself. His erection was clearly visible beneath the thin fabric of his trousers, and it fascinated him. He’d taken very little time to explore his body in the daylight, and he hadn’t realized his arousal would be so visible.
“You can… you can….” Jakob swallowed loudly. “You are… complete.”
Unsure what Jakob meant, Emet fidgeted. “Did I do something bad?”
“You… no.” Jakob squeezed his eyes shut and kept them that way for what seemed like a long time. When he opened them again, his expression was somber. “Do you know about… about sex, Emet?”
“No?”
“In the stories I’ve told you, you remember how they lie together. Like Jakob with Leah and Rachel. And you remember the Song of Songs?”
Emet nodded enthusiastically. Jakob had recited the verses in Hebrew, which Emet didn’t understand. But then Jakob had translated some of it: kisses like wine, eyes like doves.I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine. The words were so beautiful.
Jakob ran his fingers through his beard, which was something he did when he was uncomfortable or deep in thought. “People… we find someone attractive. And we want, we want to lie with them. To have sex with them. Men want women and women want men. It’s how babies are conceived. You understand?”
Emet did, although not fully. The Song of Songs spoke of one person’s soul loving another. Emet had ached at these words, knowing he didn’t possess a soul and would never possess love. But humans did; he knew that much. “Do you want a woman, Jakob?”
“No.” Jakob’s eyes filled with pain and anguish. “I want… men.”
“Oh. Do you lie with them?”
“I can’t.”
