Page 70 of The Sinner and the Scholar
Twenty-Three
Thea
Idon’t sleep well.
We’re about an hour from landing, and all I’ve caught are a few restless naps on the long couch. Everything has changed, but nothing has. Wesley snores softly in his reclined seat. After our… situation… he fell right asleep. I guess the sex did him good. But not me. I mean, I thought it did. But my stomach is now twisted into all sorts of knots.
That death is not on your hands.
I believe him.
Which makes the cause of my turmoil unfamiliar. It’s the beginning of love. It has to be. There’s no one else to blame for being in this situation but my heart. It’s not like the Rev told me to fuck Wesley to keep my enemy close. In fact, she said to learn from him. To trust him.
She’s not like the other Reverend Mothers we’ve had. She’s never asked any of us to use our bodies. She spent much of the first year of her occupancy just getting to know us and our missions. An urge to read Mary’s manuscript has me pulling out my cell phone and scrolling through snapshots of her handwriting.
"You are a woman of ill repute, Mary. How can we trust your testimony?" Peter asked, eyeing me suspiciously.
"Because I have seen the truth, Peter. I have walked with the Savior and witnessed his love firsthand," I replied, my voice firm.
"But you were a prostitute, Mary. How can we believe that you have truly changed?" Peter persisted.
"I may have been accused a sinner, Peter, but that doesn't mean I can't be a witness to the truth. The Savior himself saw me for who I truly am—a beloved child of God—and he taught me that love and acceptance are the path to salvation.”
I put my cell phone down.
This gospel will change the world. Whether Mary was a sinner was never confirmed, but she was believed to be one through lies told by men. The fact Wesley had half of this book in his supply trunk is wearing on me. It means the Vatican had it all along. Keeping this secret ensured their power.
But I don’t know if I have the strength to add this to my fight. Not now when there are so many other battles to win first.
I try to sleep again, but Prue’s face floats into my mind. The knots in my stomach tighten as I realize I’ve been up here, filling my time with wicked games and pleasure while she’s been down there already in hell.
“We won’t let anything happen to you.” Prue smooths my hair. “You’re one of us now. We protect our own.”
I sit up so fast my head swims. My heart thumps uncontrollably in my chest. I feel too much for Wes, and now I’ve fucked everything up. Mary’s message is clear. Love conquers all. But what if it’s not love? What if it’s a distraction? Wesley knew it. That’s why he went all quiet afterward. As my eyes dart about the cabin, they land on a hardwired phone beside the couch.
Only one person I know can help me make sense of my thoughts. I grab the handset, hold it to my ear, and bite my lip. The dial tone is delayed, but it works. I punch in Mercy’s number and recline on the couch to stare up. I twirl my finger around the spiraled cord while I wait for her to pick up.
It should be afternoon now… or evening. I’m losing track. With any luck, I’ve caught her at a good time—
“Mercy’s pleasure palace, how may I direct your call?”
“Babe.”
“Babe.” The humor dies from her tone, and a lump forms in my throat.
“Is she…?”
“She’s holding on. That bitch is tough. So tough.”
“Has she woken up?” Does the demon still control her?
“No, but Tawny’s been baking cookies and leaving them by the bed.”
“Why?”
“She thinks it will remind Prue of us, to keep fighting.”
“I guess she loved them. And burgers.”
