Page 70 of The Storybook Hero
Perhaps his sisters-in-law had better regroup and come up with a different strategy….
“Oh look!” Emma leaned out of the open landau to get a better view of the ducks paddling about the serpentine.
Nicholas took out a sack of breadcrumbs from his coat pocket. “Would you like to stop and feed them? Aunt Olivia says they will come eat right from your hand.”
Her hands clapped together in delight. “Really?” she asked, her eyes going wide as saucers. “May we, Alex?”
“Of course we may.”
No sooner had the coachman drawn the team to a halt by the graveled path than the two children scrambled down from their perch and lit out for the water’s edge.
For a moment, the two adults sat in awkward silence. Alex tugged at a corner of his scarf, cursing himself for a coward. Daunted by her refusal to meet his gaze, he hesitated, but knew he would despise himself forever if he didn’t make some sort of move to thaw the coolness between them. “Er, would you care to take a stroll? I imagine they will be occupied for some time.”
Octavia considered the suggestion for what seemed to be an age before giving a frosty nod.
Repressing a sigh, he handed her down from the carriage and offered his arm. They walked on for a bit, the only sound between them the brittle crunch of their steps on the stones. A sideways glance at her rigid profile caused his shoulders to sag just a touch. It might be an easier task to chip through the frozen Neva River than to melt her chill reserve.
However, after another few steps, it was Octavia who finally broke the ice. “Your family have been quite wonderful, what with the kindness they have shown to a total stranger. I am extraordinarily grateful to them for all their thoughtfulness.”
“Yes.” A faint half smile played on his lips. “So am I.”
The enigmatic comment sparked an odd flash of emotion in her eyes. Then she blinked, and it was gone, leaving him to wonder whether he had only imagined a spark of their former rapport.
“The earl has been most generous in his assistance with Emma’s situation. He thinks it may soon be resolved,” she continued softly. “And your sister-in laws have told me not to worry about my own future, as they are in the process of arranging a new position for me.”
He stopped in his tracks. “Position?”
“Why, y—yes. Something more … permanent, they said. There is no guarantee that Emma’s new guardian will want to retain me as her governess.” From a distance came a peal of laughter from the children and she turned to watch them scatter crumbs across the placid water. “I shall miss our two young charges a great deal—even the pouts and squabbles.” Her mouth quirked upward. “Indeed, I shall even miss those hours spent listening to Mrs. Radcliffe’s prose, despite its penchant for waxing melodramatic.”
A lock of hair had blown free of her bonnet as she spoke. Alex reached out to tuck it back in place, then let his hand linger on the curve of her cheek. In that instant, he decided to throw caution to the wind. “Octavia, please—will you consent to listen to a few fumbling words of mine? Lord knows when I shall have another chance to speak to you alone. And while my command of the English language will no doubt pale in comparison to that of the children’s favorite novelist, there are things I must say to you, no matter how awkwardly they are phrased.”
Octavia felta flash of heat run through her as his fingers grazed her skin. How she had missed the warmth of his company! Not just his physical presence, but his quirky humor, his gentle kindness, his fierce compassion … Even his all too human weaknesses, for he had the courage to face them, despite his efforts to appear the unrepentant rake.
She finally looked up, and the sight of the sensuous lips, lean jaw and dark, ruffled locks caused the breath to catch in her throat. On second thought, she had to admit that his physical presence had a great deal to do with the fact that her knees were in danger of folding like an overcooked souffle!
He seemed to take her inability to speak as a sign to continue.
“I never lied to you, Octavia. At first it seemed prudent to keep my family connection a secret from everyone. Then, when I knew I might trust you with our lives, I remained silent out of concern that the knowledge might put you and Emma into danger if we were apprehended by Nicholas’s pursuers.”
“I … suppose that makes some sense,” she allowed.
“And to be totally truthful,” he went on in a near whisper. “I also feared breaking the camaraderie I felt had developed between us. I thought you might like me less were you to know I was from a prominent family, rather than someone dependent on wits and pluck to survive in the world, like yourself.”
Her brows arched in utter surprise. This was not at all what she had expected to hear. “You cared whether I … liked you?”
Alex could no longer attempt a measured, rational explanation. His words spilled out in a flood of emotion. “Why do you think I sought to drown myself in a sea of vodka at the end? You had frightened me half to death by charging intodanger with no thought for your own safety. And then the thought of being parted, of never seeing you again …”
He averted his gaze. “Like a cravenly coward, I ran from the idea, sinking myself so low in your eyes that?—”
“You are no coward, Alex,” she interrupted softly. “Far from it.”
“Oh, not in any physical sense, I suppose,” he replied with a bittersweet smile. “But I lacked the courage to tell you my true feelings and therefore deserve to have you despise me. I have no doubt you would have rejected me out of hand, but at least I might have retained a shred of your respect had I told you then that … I love you.”
“L-love,” stammered Octavia, feeling her face turn as white as a Russian snowfall, and then red as a fiery ember. He was speaking so softly that she knew she must not have heard him correctly. “Surely you didn’t saylove. That’s impossible! Why, you think me shrewish, stubborn, opinionated, meddlesome?—”
“Wrong, my obstinate darling. I think you compassionate, caring, principled and entirely too brave for your own good.”
Onlookers were beginning to show a decided interest in their conversation, some of them staring quite openly. “P-perhaps we should continue this conversation in the privacy of your carriage.” Feeling none too brave at the moment, she sought some delaying tactic to regroup her defenses. “Let us call to Nicholas and Emma?—”
