Page 40 of Orpheus
I did my best to pat myself down and wipe the muck from my lips and cheeks. I was thankful to be alone in this alleyway, embarrassed if anyone were to see me in this revolting state. But a voice called from behind, startling me.
“Oh Orpheus! Is this now what’s become of you? A drunk, depressed man who gets into meaningless fights? Your family would be ashamed if they saw you in this condition.”
My eyes bulged. I was instantly alarmed, as I heard that all too familiar voice I had not heard for quite some time. I quickly spun around, shocked to see Apollo standing before me.
Why was Apollo here now, of all times? Did he come here to gloat?I thought to myself. “Why have you come?” I asked him with bitterness in my tone.
“Because I cannot stand to see a former mentee of mine wasting his time like this. You have so much to gain from this world, Orpheus. So many talents, so many skills, yet you decide to drink your life away at this miserable place?” he questioned me.
“I don’t intend on being in this slump permanently,” I admitted. “So much has happened to me in the past few months. I just need time to process it all.”
“And indulging in far too much wine is your way of processing your emotions?” he skeptically asked.
I raised my hands in the air, defeated. “I don’t know! Tell me how you propose I handle the death of the love of my life!?”
The moment those words came out of my mouth was the second I instantly wished I could retract that statement. I could not believe I had not only confessed this to Apollo but also regretted how aggressively I spoke to him. It was unheard of for a mortal to speak to a god in such a way, and not just any god, but a powerful Olympian god, for that matter.
Apollo let out a heavy sigh. “I am sorry you are going through this turmoil, Orpheus. But this is not the proper way to handle it. You are throwing your life away over this…Earth dancer. I am beyond disappointed in you.”
I was in no shape or form to receive critiques from the god. It was the last thing I needed right now. All I wanted was support, care, and compassion. The fact that he could not understand this meant that he did not know me that well. It was as I suspected all along. Apollo never got to really know me at all, the entire time we had been together in the past. It solidified my confidence in the decision I made to end our relationship together. One that was strictly based on physical attraction and my youthful naivety alone.
But I now had the strength to stand up to Apollo. No longer was I the young and innocent apprentice who catered to his every need and listened to the god’s every bit of advice and commands without question. I needed to share my feelings with him. I wanted him to understand my perspective and that would all begin with me correcting him about Eurydalos. He was not just some servant boy orEarth dancer,as Apollo so crassly put it. He was so much more than that.
“His name is Eurydalos. And he is so much more than you could ever imagine. I loved him more than anyone else in this world. He wasit. The love of my life. We had a future planned together. I could never picture my life without him by my side. But now…” I paused, not wishing to go on any further with those thoughts, in fear that I would break down and cry once again as I had done every day since the day Eurydalos left me alone in this dreadful world.
“You mean to tell me you loved this man far more than you have ever loved me and Calais?” Apollo cynically asked.
I was brazen with my answer, responding to him without any form of hesitation. “Yes. The love I had with Eurydalos was unlike any other. We had a deep connection that I’ve never experienced with anyone else in my entire life. I love him so much, it hurts.”
Apollo was deep in thought. He just blankly stared at me for a few seconds. I wished I could dive into that godly mind of his and see what it was that he was thinking. I imagined he was bothered by this statement. It was likely a huge wound to his ego that I could love another mortal more than I ever loved him.
“I knew you were in love with him. I just did not realize it was to this extent,” the god revealed.
But how? How could Apollo have known I was in love with Eurydalos, unless he kept an eye on me all this time? “So, it’s true. You have been watching me…”
Apollo nodded in affirmation. “Yes. I’ve studied your moves from afar. I’ve known about you and Calais and now you and Eurydalos. It pained me to see you move on so quickly after all that we had been through. But I should have known better.”
“I don’t think it’s fair to say that I moved on fast. The truth is, Apollo, what we had was just a physical attraction and longing for one another. Nothing more. This may sound terrible of me to say, and I don’t mean it in an offensive way by any means, but I was not in love with you. And I don’t think you were truly in love with me either,” I revealed to him.
Apollo had a stern expression on his face. It was difficult for me to decipher what he was thinking and how this revelation affected him, or if it even did at all. I just hoped I didn’t hurt him, but then that begged the question, was a god even capable of being hurt?
“I have to say, I am shocked that you feel this way. However, I do appreciate your honesty. It’s a quality I’m not quite used to experiencing from mortals,” he stated. “But I have a confession to make myself, while we are being completely open and honest with each other.”
I curled my brow, wondering what he was alluding to. “What sort of confession?”
“You must know, Orpheus, that the Vale of Tempe is sacred to me. I know of all that goes on there. So, I was well aware of the confrontation you had with Aristaeus,” Apollo admitted.
“What? That can’t be true? Does that also mean you saw how Eurydalos died?”
The God of the sun let out a deep sigh. “Yes. I know how Eurydalos died, Orpheus. After all, it was me who summoned the snake to bite him.”
What!? This cannot be!?
Were my ears deceiving me? Did I just hear Apollo correctly in that he was the reason behind my lover’s death? I became light-headed, unsure if it was this horrific new discovery or if it was the alcohol having its effect on me. Likely a combination of both. My stomach was twisting in knots. An onset of queasiness overcame me. I kneeled to the ground and began puking, coughing loudly as I released the bile out of my system.
I felt a firm hand on my back and instantly shook it off. I scooted away from Apollo, not wanting him to come anywhere near me. “Stay back!” I ordered. “Don’t come any closer!”
“Orpheus. Do not act this way. You have to hear my rationale for why I did what I did. It was not out of revenge or jealousy, as you may think.”
