Page 9 of Meek: Chasing That Gangsta Love
“You wantto go to Red Lobster out of all places?” He asked.
“I was thinkingthat I was about to spend some serious money at one of those famous restaurants. I’m glad I have a humble daughter.” He said.
If he didn’t knowI was humble, he really didn’t know me at all which was an indication that he needed to be around me more. “Daddy, I came from nothing, everything that I have right now is like gold compared to where I came from.”
He focused on the road,but he was listening. “I’m sorry about that Precious. I should’ve been there and there’s no excuse. If I could turn back the hands of time, I would. I’m going to try to do much better.”
“I don’t wantto think about the past.” I said. “What I want to know is, how are you holding up? Like, how are you really holding up?”
He shook his head.“It’s tough….it’s really tough. I may wake up tomorrow and not have a wife.” He admitted. I swallowed hard, I didn’t even know what to say about that. “Let me ask you something Precious.”
“What is it?”I asked.
“How areyour step-siblings treating you? Is everybody getting along?” He asked.
I thoughtabout telling the truth, but the lie slipped off of my tongue so easy. It was like I was used to covering up for people who hurt me starting with my own mama. “Everything is fine daddy, why you ask me that?”
He pulledin the parking lot and backed into the space. “Well because, I know that Clint somewhat has a mean streak and gets out of hands sometime. I call every day to make sure he’s taking that medicine properly.”
My heart dropped. “What medicine?”I asked.
“Clint suffers from a bipolar disorder,he’s gotten much better over the years though.” He confirmed my suspicions. I knew something was wrong with Clint; however, I didn’t want to involve my daddy into any troubles concerning me.
“No, everything is just fine.”I replied.
He lookedme in my eyes. “Well good, and if you ever feel uncomfortable then you let me know. I don’t ever want you to feel uncomfortable.”
“I got you daddy.I’m okay.” I gave him a phony smile.
“Good.”He said. “Now let’s go in here and eat some crabs.”
I enjoyedthe dinner I shared with my daddy, he was much different than my mama. I’m not even sure how those two even ended up together. It was like mixing oil with vinegar. She was mean as hell, he was humble and sweet; any woman would’ve been lucky to have a decent man. When we arrived back at the house, he let me out and said he’d be back in a little while. He was going to sit with his wife for a little bit.
At first,I almost asked him if I could ride, but I didn’t want to alarm him, so instead of hesitating, I got out. “I’ll see you a later on and tell her I send my love. I’m praying for her.”
“Thanks baby girl.”He smiled before pulling off.
I walked insideand tossed my books on Brittany’s bed since she wasn’t coming back anyway until another two days. I walked into the kitchen to put the leftover food in the fridge and grabbed a knife on the way out. I don’t know why I did, I just did. Just in case Clint wanted to try me again. This time I was going to fight back with everything in me. I was no longer going to let him take advantage of me.
I placedthe knife up under my pillow and went to shower. When I was finished, I sat on the bed and laid flat on my back to watch TV. I thought about the dude named Kidd from the library and wondered what side of town he was from. A part of me wanted to call him; I needed to boost my social life a little more and maybe I wouldn’t be stuck in the house all the time. I then thoughtabout the projects, I knew they were turned up on that side, especially since it was the weekend.
After some time,I cuddled up on my pillow and slid one hand underneath it before dozing off. In the middle of the night, I heard the door cracking open and since I was a light sleeper, I opened my eyes to find Clint walking in holding a bottle of Grey Goose in his hands as he drank straight from the bottle. He walked over to me and stood directly over me. “Who the fuck was that nigga you were with at the library?” He slurred.
I grippedthe bottom of the knife and as my heartbeat fast as hell, not tonight… he wasn’t taking advantage of me again. I sat up with fear in my eyes, I know he saw it. “I don’t know him.” I said being honest. “He was talking to me about a book.” I said.
He tooka swig of the drink and belched loudly. “That pussy is mine and if you try to give it away, I’ll kill your hoe ass.” He threatened.
I couldn’t believethis shit. It was like in his mind he really thought he owned me. I would do anything to defuse the situation though. “I’m sorry Clint, it won’t happen again.” I said lowering my eyes.
He jackedme up by my gown. “You damn right it won’t happen again! I’mma be digging in this pussy every night from now on to make sure of that!” He let go and pushed me back with one hand since he was still holding the bottle. He used one hand to unbuckle his pants as the nightlight bounced off of his hazel eyes.
I closedmy eyes and prayed, when I felt him lean down to apply the pressure of his body on top of mine, without looking, I took the knife and plunged it into his abdomen. “Not tonight! Not ever! Leave me alone!” I began to yell not knowing what came over me as the tears poured from my eyes. I opened my eyes to see Clint rolled over holding his stomach as the bottle dropped from his hand causing the liquor to splatter all over the floor.
I hoppedup looking at the blood on my hands and began to shake uncontrollably. I was freaking out watching Clint gasping for air. I wanted to help him, but I was stuck. I couldn’t move. What the fuck had I done? I was too young to go to jail.
“Clint!”I called his name, and he didn’t respond. “Clint! Clint! Clint! Clint!” I kept chanting his name as my body crumpled to the floor. I dropped the knife next to me and cried. I didn’t know whether he was dead or alive; I couldn’t look.
I reachedup snatching the cordless phone from the base and hit the talk button to reach my daddy. “Hello?” I said with a shaking voice when I realized somebody was already on the line.
