Page 6 of Meek: Chasing That Gangsta Love
I thoughtback to the night Clint raped me and pushed it back out of my mind. “Do you see how light I am?” I put on a phony smile. “I bruise up so easy, no telling how I did that, you know I’m clumsy.”
“Um hm.I hope you wouldn’t lie to me.” He stopped to look in my eyes.
“I’m not telling a lie,it’s the truth.” I said. “But since you have questions, so do I. Why don’t you ever go visit your mom? And why does my daddy stay away from the house so much?” I asked.
We tooktiny steps as we enjoyed each other’s company and conversation. “Well, I’m not gonna lie yo, a nigga don’t want to see his mama laid up in the hospital like that. I guess it’s just a mental preparation for what we already know is coming. As far as Ken….” He said referring to my daddy. “It’s almost like when she got sick a year ago, so did he; that nigga barely even talks to us like he used to and he’s always at the hospital working so he can be close to her.”
“Why didhe come for me if he wasn’t going to be active in my life?” I asked, that shit made no sense to me.
“He always talkedabout you for years Kisha, I just think that he was so hurt by what your mama did; he didn’t know how to deal with you without dealing with her. I mean shit, if my first love hurt me like that, I can’t say I could look at her ass, and you killing the shit right now yo.”
“What does that mean?”I asked.
“Like,you have Ken’s genes but you look every bit of your mama. I’ve seen the pictures that he did keep of her, and I could imagine how hard it is for him to look at you.” He said. I didn’t know how I felt about that, so I was glad when we made it to the house, I had no response for him. “I gotta run down the block to check on my girl real quick but I’ll be right back.” He rushed off leaving me alone at the house or so I thought.
I usedmy key to let myself in and dropped my books on the floor next to my bed when I got inside of the room that I shared with Brittany’s ass. I liked when I had the house to myself, but I couldn’t lie, I was missing the hood. I missed the projects and most of all, I missed Meek. I looked at myself in the mirror and shook my head. I hated the schoolgirl uniforms they made us wear to school especially with the ugly matching ties. With nothing left to do, I laid across the bed and thought about Meek even more, I wished I had a number for him; talking to him would be nice. I pulled on my headphones and played Mariah Carey’s station listening to her song that always reminded me of Meek when I started missing him. ‘Don’t Forget About Us’.
CHAPTER 2
“Meek! Snap out of it. You might as well leave that shit alone because the only place you’ll end up is dead or in jail behind some stupid shit.” Reesie fussed at me standing behind the register at Home-styles Soul Food. “You better hurry up and prep that meatloaf before Rob gets back in here.”
I turned aroundand put the fucking meat in the oven with a mug on my face. Reesie was right and this did pay my bills, but still, this shit wasn’t enough. Every day I watched the same nigga’s from 54thStreet pull up in their foreign whips, order their food, make a transaction and then bounce. This shit was getting tiring as fuck. I was born broke; I wasn’t trying to die broke. Nigga, I was trying to hustle from the beginning of January to the end of December as soon as I found the perfect hustle.
I checkedthe temperature and took my plastic gloves off before putting on a fresh pair. “You know what Reesie.” I said finally looking at her. “I don’t give a fuck about Rob; he working a niggalike a slave and enjoying his muthafuckin’ life. A nigga can’t even get a free meal out this bitch.”
Reesie turnedaround after putting a stack of money in the lower safe. On any given day she could talk me out of my misery, but not today. I was with all the shits and doo doo’s today. This shit was getting ridiculous. She removed her work hat from her head and let her long silky weave loose. Reesie was average, stood about 5’5, brown skin, and bowlegged. She wasn’t pretty, but she wasn’t ugly either; she was just aiight. Her personality and her realness is what would make a nigga choose her over a bad bitch any given day. I met her right here in this spot; she was so thorough she even put in a word for me to get this job without even really knowing me. After that, it was on and popping. We ended up closing together one night and did more than just close. We got that shit poppin’ right there in the restroom and been kicking it ever since.
She releasedthe top button on her collar shirt so she could finally breath easily and took a deep breath; she looked at me with those dark brown eyes like she always did and smiled showing her dimples. “Look, you’ll be okay Meek, I promise, but don’t go and run behind those niggas. It’s nothing that nobody can do for you, that with time, you can’t do for yourself.”
Something snappedin me when she said that; it was something about the powerfulness of that statement. I didn’t have shit to lose, and she was right. I took the new pair of gloves off and untied the apron Rob made us wear while working in this fucking slave house. “You know what Reesie? You’re absolutely right, and after tonight, I’m out this bitch. Fuck Rob and this sweat box.”
Reesie stopped smilingand was now frowning with her arms folded across her chest. “You can’t just quit like that Meek, do you know how bad that shit is going to make me look? I put in a word for you to get this job.”
I knewit was wrong of me to do that, and she was right, while I appreciated it I had to do what I had to do. “I appreciate that, you can come with me, or you can stay here and keep sweating your weave out. Either way, I’m out this bitch. Yesterday was my nineteenth birthday and I won’t go into my twenties like this.” I shook my head. “Nah, not like this.” I turned away from her and walked out leaving her to make the decision. I didn’t know what tomorrow was about to bring, I didn’t even know where my next dollar was coming from, but I was going to get it by any means necessary.
I grabbedmy jacket and walked out the door after zipping it up. It was 45 degrees this evening and cold as hell. I put my hood on and tucked my hands in my front pockets preparing to walk to the projects which were right down the street. I hadn’t even made it halfway down the block before I heard Reesie calling me.
“Meek! Hold up Meek!”She jogged to me wearing her thick royal blue jacket and UGG boots. She also wore her hood covering the top of her head. A matching pair of royal blue gloves graced both of her hands. “Damn, you’re walking fast.” She caught up now walking on the side of me. “I don’t know what your plan is, but I want in. I’m with you.” She said.
I stoppedon the corner and looked into her face to see how serious she was; her eyes told me she meant it. She was alwaysdown for whatever. I knew Reesie was tough because she was forced to have to be. When she was 10 years old, she watched her daddy get killed right in front of her. Some big-time dope dealing ass nigga blew his fucking brains out over some petty cash. After that, she moved in with her older sister and her weak ass boyfriend. Eventually the nigga started raping Reesie and her sister ain’t do shit about it. When she told me about it, I acted on that shit immediately. I even took her to file the report on his ass. Whatever happened after that was none of my business and since she had nowhere else to go; I let her come stay with me in my little one bedroom.
The cars zippeddown the Liberty City streets and I thought about everything as quickly as my brain allowed me. When I got home, I had a plan. “Come on.” I told her. “It’s colder than a muthafucka out here.” We weren’t used to this shit, winter in Miami was never really winter, it was hot all year around but for some reason after summer, we’d been having cold fronts more than usual.
Reesie walked nextto me until we reached the projects. I saw Rags bitch ass posted up sitting on top of his new Audi and thought about what a bitch ass nigga he was. He wouldn’t even look my way; that ass whooping I gave him, was an-‘L’ he had to deal with in the hood. Half those niggas knew not to fuck with me, I minded my business and did my own thing but if you pissed me off, these hands were lethal. I was known in the hood as Floyd Jr. After Kisha left, I stopped fucking with all these weak ass niggas that thought it was funny to sit up and gossip with Rags bitch ass. How you gonna talk about a girl without knowing her whole situation? I actually got a chance to know her, and I’ve never met a person with a more beautiful heart.Even though it seemed like she forgot about a nigga, I would never forget about her, and I prayed for her every night.
I openedthe door and dropped my keys on the nightstand that sat right next to the door when we walked in. I pulled my jacket off and kicked off my Timbs. Reesie did the same and sat her boots next to the door. Sitting next to me, she threw her head back on the couch and then focused toward the picture of Kisha and I hanging on the wall in a gold frame.
“Areyou ever gonna take that picture down?” She asked.
“No.”I replied.
She cleared her throat.“What’s so special about her, besides the fact that she’s pretty?” She asked.
I focusedon the picture myself. I remember that day like it was yesterday. We were all hanging out in front of building ‘B’ in the front. For once, Kisha’s mama had finally done something nice for her and threw her a huge birthday bash that everybody in the projects were welcomed to out in the field. Kisha was so happy that day; she was fourteen and she looked so pretty. Her makeup was lightly done, and her hair was flowing down her back. The crème jumper she wore was so pretty.
“She’s a special girl period;she was like my best friend. Even if I tried, I could never forget about her. She didn’t have shit to her name; not nothing, but she still tried to share some of what she had with me. All the nights my mama locked a nigga out; she still opened her room to me. Its nights we used to starve together;shit we got bit up by bedbugs together.” I chuckled thinking about it. Shit was crazy.
“You miss her, don’t you?”She asked now staring at me.
