Page 119 of Sidhe
It was an easy enough thing to agree to. There was nothing else Sasha wanted. He turned to Nathan ready to accept, ready to say,yes, of course, this is what I want, but when he looked andNathan turned his head to look back at him, red on black eyes burned into Sasha like a warning and jarred him roughly awake.
He came to full consciousness, rolling toward the warmth near him, wanting to hold Nathan and banish that awful image from his mind, before remembering that it was more than just a dream.
Sasha flinched back from the warm spot that was quickly cooling next to him, no longer holding the form and weight of Nathan that Sasha knew had been lying there not long ago. Only it wasn’tNathanthat had been there, Sasha reminded himself, it was something else, something that meant to trick him, to lure him into choosing him just as Malak had lured Nathan.
Not a chance in Hell, Sasha thought with conviction.
As he crawled out of bed, hating how refreshed that forced sleep had made him feel, it disturbed Sasha to find himself stripped down from the T-shirt and jeans he had been wearing to just his boxers.
After dressing quickly, Sasha moved to the door only to freeze in place as someone knocked just before he could open it. Nathan stood outside.
“You’re awake.” Nathan smiled from the other side of the threshold, compassion and softness strong in his red on black eyes that flickered to green as their gazes met.
Sasha couldn’t help noticing that Nathan wore dark jeans, a red T-shirt, and a black button down over it, like some awful parody of Malak’s suit. He wondered if Nathan had actually put those clothes on or if they had manifested naturally that way.
“Yeah. Thanks for…” Sasha trailed, holding gazes with Nathan as best he could, much as half of him wanted to sink down into the carpet and weep, “for…leaving me alone last night.”
Nathan gauged him a moment, as if trying to assess if Sasha was being honest. “You’re not quite where I want you to be, but I know you’ll see things my way. That’s all I want from you, notdomination. Not over you. I just want you to be a part of this. It was so hard last night,” he said, as he reached up to run the back of his fingers along Sasha’s cheek, “not touching you.God. You have no idea how hard that was.” He leaned up to kiss Sasha.
Instinct had Sasha flinching back.
“Please,” Nathan said rather than get angry or pull away, hovering there, his breath mingling with Sasha’s and smelling strangely like nothing—nothing at all.
Staring at those lips so close, the green eyes that were a wonderful veil, Sasha’s own eyes darted past Nathan to see that they were not alone. Solrin and Jim stood in the hallway, like sentinels on guard.
Sasha told himself that he was feeding the part of Nathan that was stillNathanas he turned back and allowed the kiss. That alone had him pressing the connection deeper, enjoying it even, the way Nathan’s lips and tongue moved against his own in such a familiar way.
“All you have to do is ask, baby,” Nathan whispered when they pulled apart, “and I can give you all the power and strength you could ever want. You won’t fear. You won’t worry. I can give you the whole world and I will, just like I showed you last night.”
Sasha knew Nathan meant the dream.
He stroked Sasha’s face once more then stepped back. “I have to take care of a few things. There are a lot of foolish people out there trying to wreck this before I’ve even started. I’m going to have to…make it a little more difficult for them to get to us.”
“I thought you just wanted to rid the world of evil,” Sasha said carefully, “so no one has to lose the people they love like we did.”
Nathan smiled patronizingly at him. “That’s only the beginning, baby. Evil in the world goes further than that. I can’t just let things be when I have the power to do so much good. The world needs me to help…leadthings in the right direction.”
Sasha fought a shiver. He nodded at Nathan like he understood, like he agreed, because if he didn’t play along, he knew he’d be screaming and pounding his fists against Nathan’s chest the next moment, and maybe after that he’d find himself waking up as a willing servant like Jim.
“We need to fortify this place a bit better,” Nathan said. “This is home base and I want it protected. You can join me downstairs when you’re ready. Sol, Jim, let’s go,” he said as he began to move away from Sasha toward the stairs, heading down to do god knows what.
Sasha stood very still as Nathan left him, the worst kind of nausea hitting his stomach as Solrin and Jim followed without a word. He managed to hold it together, letting Solrin pass, but when Jim got close, he couldn’t stop himself.
He grabbed the front of Jim’s shirt and pulled, pushing him up against the doorframe of the bedroom, and glared into his face, not caring that amber eyes were what he had to look at. “Where’s Alex?” Sasha hissed. “What did you do to her? What did he do toyou?”
“Sasha…” Jim said in a low voice, gaze darting past him to where Nathan had disappeared. The amber eyes made it impossible to read him. “Alex is fine. She’s just downstairs. I’d never let anything happen to her. This isn’t what you think.”
“Sure it’s not.” Sasha pushed away from Jim, disgusted and shaken, and retreated back into the bedroom.
Jim’s hand was on his arm in moments, pulling him back, and when Sasha turned angrily to face him again, he found himself forced against the doorframe in Jim’s place.
Sasha growled, showing fangs, his eyes flashing red in the face of Jim’s amber. But before he had the chance to fight any further, Jim tucked into the crook of his neck and whispered as fast and as quietly as he could.
For a moment Sasha barely heard the words, but then he registered them, he understood, and…God, what Jim was telling him changed everything. Sasha felt sick, defeated. He was almost certain he would fall to the ground right that moment and never get up.
“It’ll be okay,” Jim said, so certain, like Nathan sounded every time he said it, and that only made it worse.
Somehow, Sasha didn’t fall, but remained against the doorframe even after Jim pulled away and went after the others down the stairs. Sasha stood there for what had to have been several minutes, and when he finally moved it was mechanical, jerky movements in the opposite direction. He left his door open as he headed for the library, not really thinking of where he was going other thanawayfrom everyone else.
