Page 43 of Bookgasms
At least this way I won’t have to look her in the eye while I spill my guts. That should make this easier, right?
“What’s going on, Andrés? You’re starting to worry me.” Dani slips her hand into mine, and I can see the puzzled look she’s giving me in my periphery.
See? I’m already fucking this up.
“I’ve…uhh…been doing a lot of thinking lately about what I want from life.” I shrug. “I’m not getting any younger, and while Victor is proof that I have a good chance of being able to do this for longer than I thought I would, I don’t want my entire life to be about this job.”
She hums, nodding. “That’s understandable. We should always have more in our lives than work.”
“I’m in love with you,” I blurt, wincing as I drop my head.
Yup, definitely fucked that up.
Dani is silent, and when I work up the nerve to turn in her direction, she’s staring at me in shock. Her hand is limp in mine, but she doesn’t try to pull away.
That has to count for something, right?
“You…love me?”
I nod. “I have been for a long time, but not just you. I’m going to be completely upfront with you because doing otherwise would be fucked up. I’m demi. I can’t have sex with people I don’t feel something for. I’m just not attracted to them until there’s an emotional connection.”
“Oh. I didn’t know that.” She squeezes my hand. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
I shrug again, staring at the warehouse on the other side of the parking lot. She doesn’t seem to be in shock anymore, and I’m afraid of what I’ll find on her face if I look at her.
“Yeah. Sure.”
She laughs, leaning over to lay her head on my shoulder. “It was brave of you to tell me this, but if you need to feel something for someone before you sleep with them…does that mean you’re also interested in Maya and Victor?”
“And Jason.” I snort, running my hand through my hair and finally taking a glance at her. “I’m a mess.”
She shakes her head. “Not at all. I have a confession of my own to make.”
I twist around to face her when she doesn’t immediately speak. “Take all the time you need.”
“I’m at least half in love with all four of you.” Her eyes dart up to meet mine before she looks away again.
“Yeah?”
She nods before frowning. “Wait. You and Maya? I thought the two of you weren’t as close anymore.”
“We’re not.”
“But you slept together…” Dani’s eyes go wide. “Ohmigod, this isn’t the first time you’ve slept together?!”
“She didn’t tell you?” I ask, scoffing when she shakes her head. “Yeah, a little over a year ago, and right after is when she started pulling away.”
She shakes her head. “Gods, she’s a dumbass. I’m sorry she did that to you… Did she tell you about why she has issues with commitment?”
I nod. “She did. I get it, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less.”
“Trust me, I know.” Suddenly, she grins. “So what does this mean? For us, I mean.”
I hadn’t really thought that far ahead—mainly because I didn’t expect her to admit to having feelings for me too.
“Ummm…what do you want it to mean?” I ask her, rubbing the back of my neck with my free hand.
When the hell did I get so awkward? I feel like someone else has taken over my body.
