Page 77 of In Death's Hands
“It’ll be safer,” he pleads. “We can take Fenrick to Cel and explain everything. Then I’ll come get you and take you back home.” He moves to grab my arm, but I shake off his hold right away.
“Don’t. I have no home.”
He masks the pain in his eyes quickly, but I still catch it. “Liv.”
“No.”
Atys seems smug and throws a knowing smile at Nathan, who only sighs and shakes his head. “So, whatareyour titles?” The change of subject is not subtle, but I am truly curious. Looking at Atys, I realise that his having a title means he’s part of a high tier in the Blue Depths Crown. Though I shouldn’t be surprised, as he was at Thalnus’ side when we met. But it’s hard to reconcile the irreverent male with one of significant duties and power.
“Well,Iam the Rainbow Lord,” Atys tells me with a wink.
Certain he’s making a joke, I burst out laughing. It feels good, like I’m lighter for a few moments. But the laughter comes to a crashing halt when more gasps and offended whispers travel through the crowd. I look around quickly before focusing back on Atys with a contrite look. Thankfully, he doesn’t seem offended. With a big smile, he says, “You may laugh, but wouldn’t you agree it’s the perfect title for me?”
Scared of making another faux pas, I count to ten before answering. “Uhm, sure. So, what, you… you make rainbows appear?” Thinking about last night, I quickly add, “Or are you some sort of LGBTQ+ protector?”
Both Nathan and Atys laugh brightly, and I get stuck on Nathan’s face for too long. I so rarely see any warmth in it that when I do, the world seems to pause to admire him alongside me.
“I command rainwater,” Atys answers softly.
My heart rate accelerates. I keep forgetting exactly who and what these people around me are. I breathe in once, twice, and open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes. He commands rainwater.
“But the fact that the queer community uses a rainbow isn’t lost on him, don’t worry. The first time he saw it, rainbows started popping up everywhere, even without a single drop of rain,” Nathan adds, bumping his shoulder against mine. When I look up at him, his face is open, and I can see he’s trying hard to make me feel more at ease with everything, but I frown when his words from last night come back too vividly.
“True.” Atys chuckles. “What can I say, I support my own.”
“What’s yours, then?” I ask Nathan.
“He’s—”
“You already know mine,” says Nathan, cutting Atys off.
Death’s assistant. Right. I nod and look around. Anywhere else to avoid his face and the memories it brings.
“Soooo…” I start. “Am I supposed to use those?” I’m pretty sure my nose wrinkles as I ask.
“Please don’t.”
“No need, pumpkin.”
They speak at the same time. A study in contrasts both in their answers and their expressions. But at least they agree on my not using their titles. I would have felt silly.
Atys grabs my hand and puts it back on his forearm. “Friends don’t use titles. And you and I are friends, right?” he asks brightly, but his eyes are guarded, and I get the sense that he feels unsteady with this question. Like he’s afraid of my answer. It makes my heart warm to think that he truly wants to be friends with me. That maybe even Origins can be as lonely as I often feel. When I nod, his eyes sparkle, and he squeezes my hand once before turning to Nathan. “However, your title is even more impressive than mine,Nathan. Are you certain you don’t want our lovely dove here using it?”
Nathan’s face darkens, and I find myself inching closer to hear his answer through his gritted teeth. “The titles are meaningless.” His eyes burn but are fixed on the Origins still eavesdropping on us without shame. The busybodies all find something else to focus on, many of them even scattering around the garden.
“Meaningless?” I frown. “Don’t they show the way your society works?”
He drags his eyes back to me and sets me aflame. I take a deep breath, trying to be discreet about it, about the fact that contrary to the people around us, his type of fire isn’t something that makes me want to run away. No. It makes me want to burnwithhim. His eyes dip to my mouth and everything in me stops. But once again I remember that the fire I feel for him is only one-sided. He said kissing me was a mistake, so everything I feel is one too. That thought is enough to quench the flames and leave nothing but smoke behind.
He seems to sense the change in me because he answers quietly, his eyes back on mine but guarded, the deep dark impenetrable. “We don’t remember what our society was. We borrowed titles from the humans and figured out a chain of command based on the power we each hold in our veins.”
I clear my throat, still feeling overwhelmed by his mere presence but trying hard to hide it. “Whether things were like that before or not doesn’t really matter, does it? It doesn’t change the fact that now there is a specific order and chain of command that you all follow. Our world has seen many different kinds of leadership changes, but each one followed rules. A society needs some, I guess.” I shrug, not certain I’m being clear. Not even certain I know what my point is.
Nathan blinks at me, tilting his head sideways. “Does it mean you want to start addressing Atys as ‘His Lordship’?” he asks with a smirk that does things to me.
I choke a bit before finding my breath. “No. No, I don’t think I will.” I press my lips together to stop them from curling up.
Atys bumps his hip against mine. “I’d say I’m offended, but I already gave you a pass.”
