Page 17 of The King's Bodyguard
After a moment, Corrin looked down. Hesitantly, he placed his broad palm over my hand. Against my tan skin, his paleness stood out starkly, but the feeling of his thumb running along the inside of my palm felt warm. It was like a spark of fire or of lightning, racing up from my hand to my spine, my belly, and lower.
“Living in the mountains, I didn’t really spend time with the Sunna. Goddess knows the Derulan family weren’t about to give us the time of day,” Corrin said slowly. “I had no idea that this was a commonly held custom among your kin.”
“The Munni don’t use a potion?” I asked curiously.
“No.”
“How do they get through it? What do they use?”
“Sex.”
His voice suddenly sounded huskier than normal.
“Sex,” I said, suddenly feeling hot all over. “You’ve-you’ve...”
Corrin nodded and slowly met my eyes.
“We allow nature to take its course. She was—“ He stopped and shook his head. “Never mind that. It was simply a moment in time. We both shared two days of pleasure together.”
“A molly.” Something inside of me cried out.
“Yes,” Corrin said. “In the end, mollies weren’t of interest to me, but... I do not regret that time for the world.”
“Oh,” Relief washed over me.
“But you, you didn’t experience that-that moment of pleasure and happiness,” Corrin said slowly. “You never had a chance. If I could, I would have...”
“You would have what?” I found myself leaning forward, clutching his hand.
Corrin’s hand rose, and he brushed back a stray golden lock that had caught on my eyelash. Something sad and wistful crossed his face before disappearing. Something he refused to name.
I wanted to know. Needed to know. As if reading my mind, Corrin leaned in. Now we shared the same breath, our noses brushing against each other. Suddenly feeling shy and breathless, my eyelids fluttered closed. I wanted it so much—the touch of his lips against mine. My first kiss. If only it could belong to Corrin.
The tension within me coiled about. All of my senses honed in on the tom before me. His outdoorsy scent, the strength of his hand on mine, and the tantalizing brush of his nose and then forehead. For a minute, I leaned against him. I wanted to take the first step, but I had no idea really how to start. What if I made a fool of myself?
As if sensing my hesitancy, misreading my quivering desire, Corrin drew back. My chest grew tighter as the moment passed. Corrin was so close, and yet so far away. I clung to his hand a moment longer, but when it drew away, I let it go reluctantly.
“I would have tried to make you happy. Even if it was for a short time, it would be better than nothing,” he said huskily. “Now, more than ever, I recognize the sacrifice you make for us.”
“It’s hard,” I admitted, wishing he would have leaned in and kissed me.
I didn’t quite understand what drove Corrin to this moment, but I enjoyed the way he was looking at me. It was as though I was the only cat in the world. I shifted closer, enjoying his faint warmth, the scent of apple that we now both shared, and the faint scent of horse and night air. I wished he could remain at my side forever.
“But with you around, it’s easier. You will stay, won’t you, Corrin?”
“Always,” he promised.
Chapter 8
Corrin
Ishould have kissed him. I should have just leaned in and taken possession of those lips. Landis had been so ready, so willing. With his head tilted and eyes half-closed, he had all but bared himself before me. I could have drawn him close, unbuttoned the rest of his white cotton shirt, and run my hands along the soft lines of his slender body. In my mind’s eye, the glow of his hair caught like precious gold in the light of the fire.
There had been a red flush beneath his tan skin, a flush that had brightened his lips and heightened the sparkle in his eyes. Those lips. They had seemed as soft as the strands of golden curls and the brush of skin I had felt at his temple. At that moment, if I had stolen Landis’s first kiss, what would have happened then? My imagination ran wild. He would have tasted of apple and spice and tea. Perhaps something else.
Perhaps if I had kissed him, I would have prolonged the moment. I would have been able to give him a taste of what pleasure was. I sighed as I trudged down the long hall tothe King’s bedchamber. Of course, this could have been pride talking. After all, Landis might find happiness with the Princess.
Just because Landis is about to be married didn’t mean his life is over, I reminded myself.Far from it. Most people believe the opposite. The young tom is about to be ushered into the sanctum of domestic bliss. I might not see it that way, but perhaps Landis might. Truth be told, I simply wished that moment could have been shared with me.
