Page 199 of Love Me in the Dark
I went through the rest of the letters in quick succession, feeling the lump in my throat grow with each one. The green envelope was last, and my fingers hesitated over their task. I didn’t even want to open it, honestly.
I was so tired of rejection.
But I had to. Just in case. Resolutely, I tore it open and pulled the single sheet of paper out.
Dear Ms. Tiernay,
WELCOME TO CHANDLER UNIVERSITY! We are pleased to inform you that your application for transfer…
My vision grayed, and the letter fluttered from suddenly nerveless fingers to the floor. I did it! They wanted me!
Everything this meant slammed into me, and my knees buckled. I slid to the floor, one hand finding the letter and crumpling it in my fist. Tears streamed down my face, and I wailed into the silence of my empty house. I had never wanted someone more than I did in that moment to share this news. To hug. To transfer the sheer magnitude of relief I felt—it was so huge. So overwhelming.
I needed someone.
And I had no one.
After a while I stood, wiping my eyes with the back of the hand that still held the letter from Chandler University. I was alone right now, yes. I was alone, and I was making it on my own, because I was strong.
That wouldn’t always be the case, though.
One day Eleanor would be here.
One day…maybe…I’d have another family. One that didn’t lie and cheat and run away from hard things.
But for now?
For now, I was going to focus on the things that were important.
School. Job. Eleanor.
Survival.
7
Jude
Iwas trying to hold it together; I really was, but something was going to have to give.
My stomach churned with nerves, and I chewed on my fingernail as I sat and waited for my turn to interview for the waitressing job at Sugar Babes, a restaurant just off campus. It was just after lunch, the dead part of the day, but the place was still pretty busy with a good flow of student clientele.
I could see why.
The waitresses were dressed in unashamedly skimpy costumes—short skirts, heels or hooker boots, and shirts that left a lot of cleavage on display. The general theme was sexy anything-college related—schoolgirl, athlete, cheerleader, professor—as long as it had something to do with the college experience, it was fair game.
I took a deep breath and looked down at my own modest button-up and jeans. The button-up was a size too big exceptover my breasts, the tails flowing down to mid-thigh. The jeans, at least, were form-fitting.
I needed this job.
I needed something close to campus, which was three hours away from Cold Spring, and I needed a place to stay on campus, so I could just go home on the weekends to see Eleanor. I was running myself ragged trying to go back and forth and work at the fast food place.
Plus, I was spending everything I earned on gas money.
Standing up, I unbuttoned my shirt down to show some cleavage, and then unbuttoned it from the bottom a few buttons, as well. Criss-crossing the ends, I tied them in the back, pulling the fabric taut around my waist and torso.
The girl sitting across from me grinned faintly. “Much better.”
“Thanks.” I sat back down.
