Page 185 of Love Me in the Dark

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Lola

“Momma! Momma, are you home?” I holler as soon as I step over the front door, the sweet smell of her cooking, her famous Cajun chicken roasting in the oven it’s making my mouth water just thinking about the tender and incredibly juicy Cajun butter chicken.Gah my favorite!But the thought of food right now actually makes me gag.

“Hey, honey I’m out the back!” She yells back, I stride through the kitchen and adjoining dining room, barely missing Missy, her black and white shorthair cat in the process. I pull the French doors wider to see my Momma doing some gardening in the back yard,

“Mom…” I’m able to rasp out as my heart pounds as much as my Mom and Dad haven’t been together for over 10 plus years, but I know deep down she still loves him. Without looking up my mum carries on

“How are you doing hon’? Everything ok with work?” I just stare at the back of her blonde hair that’s cut short into a blunt cut but longer at the front, she’s bent over pulling out weeds in the morning sun. My mind doesn’t want to work and all I can say is “Mom!” I gasp out again as the emotion clogging my voice, which stops her in her weed pulling and whips here head around at me. Her ray bans still on but her face falls as she catches sight of mine. Snatching her sunglasses off, her eyes scan my body

“Lola, what is it? Talk to me sweetheart… why aren’t you at work?” I don’t say anything, I just drop to the floor next to her and the dam breaks inside. I thought I was strong and able to tell her, but I’m so scared after getting the phone call in the early hours of the morning. Big fat tears roll down my face, she wraps her arms around me cocooning me with her love, she knows it’s something big I barely ever cry, it takes her rubbing my back and soothing whispered words of “it’s ok baby girl, just take deep breaths and take your time.” I’m able to get my breathing back under control after a few minutes, gulping down air to be able to speak.

“Mom… it’s Dad. He’s in hospital, the hospital in Perry rang me as he’s got me down as his emergency contact. He was in a hit and run, I rang uncle Beef, and he said he’s in a pretty bad shape.” I glance up from my playing at my fingers and the tears swimming in my Moms eyes and the tremble of her bottom lip guts me. We hold each other tighter for what we could have lost, and I continue. “Uncle Beef said… he said that he- he flatlined on the table when they were repairing the damage. One of his ribs broke and punctured his lung, he’s got bad road rash and a broken fibula. I’m going down to look after him.”

“Lola-“

“No Mom! You’re not stopping me. I don’t care, the club they’re his family as much as we are his, but those bikers aren’t going to be able to look after him like he needs. And Daddy isn’tstaying in hospital whilst I’m here. But Mom, I want you to come with me, please?”

“Lola, I wasn’t going to stop you from looking after your Dad, but you know I don’t like the club life that’s why I brought you here, I can’t go back to Perry as much as I’m glad your Dad is okay.” I understand where she’s coming from, but I can’t believe she doesn’t even want to see for herself that Dad’s okay.

“I get it, I do mom, but this isn’t one of your three-month relationships that you get bored of, this isDad. I know you still love him; do you not want to see for yourself that he’s okay?” I plead with her as she starts playing with her necklace, it’s got a turquoise gem set in white gold it’s simple and rests at the hollow of her neck.

“This isn’t about whether I love your Dad or not, I’llalwayslove him as he gave me you sweetie. But going back there where everyone in the club hates me for what I did taking you away from him, I don’t want that. I may deserve it in their eyes, but I did what was right for you and me.” Inhaling a deep breath

“Okay, it’s your choice. “ I slide out of her arms and stand up and swipe my palms over my eyes, rubbing the tears away, “I’ll let you know when I get there.” She doesn’t say anything, she just sits there on the perfectly manicured lawn looking in shock and paler than when I dropped this all on her. As I get to the backyard’s iron gate I turn back around “for what it’s worth Dad wouldn’t let anyone say anything bad about you while he’s around and you know that deep down. See you soon, I love you Momma.”

It’s beenclose to two and half hours since I left Moms and I’ve been gunning my ‘Lady’ aka my Triumph Bonneville Roadsterthat I got for my 18thbirthday from my Dad, even now with my shades on the sunlight still catches the stunning metallic purple paintwork and the black chrome making it gleam as the sun beam off it. Honestly it still looks practically brand new mainly because I was taught by my dad to take care of it when he handed me the keys to her, I remember practically bouncing on the tarmac of moms drives, but then mom kept going about them being a death trap but my Dad taught me everything about my bike, what to do and not what to do, and what happens if you get taken off your bike… the thought makes me feel sick thinking about it now. I’m on the way straight to Perry General Hospital to see my Dad first, the cool air whipping around with me as the sights of Perry flashes by on main street and then I see a familiar sight,Mornin’; a coffee shop that I love coming too when I come and visit my Dad. My face breaks out into a small smile, so I decide to pull in and grab my dad a black coffee with two sugars and grab myself an iced cold brew storing them under my seat to head towards the hospital.

Standingat the end of the bed gazing down at the body under the gray looking white hospital sheets, that cover over his broken leg and the fear regrips ahold of me scaring me all over again as my eyes cast over his body again and again, the thick bandages around his left forearm and I can see the rawness and inflamed of the road rash decorating the skin on the back of his hand. His other arm isn’t dressed but still has some pretty bad road rash covering it, my eyes sweep over my dad’s upper arms which are decorated in black tattoos and over his chest which is bare minus a faded but beautiful detailed rose over his chest. Thinking about how alone he looks in this room on his own, but I’m glad UncleBeef and Scorch, who I haven’t seen in years was here, as soon as I entered his room, they both welcomed me in huge hugs and BeefI swear he’s gotten biggerhe looked like he had tears in his eyes when he pulled me away. They said they would step out for me to have some time with my dad, and I agreed once I can see he’s okay I’d go back to the clubhouse with them as they’re changing over guard duty.

“You know you can talk to him, he’s only asleep.” A soft voice comes from beside me, glancing over to my right I see a nurse looking over his chart and then checking over his monitors, she’s gotta be like in her 40’s or 50’s short and petite with her brunette hair up in a clip at the back of her head I eventually find my voice not moving my eyes from Dad,

“Is he - is he in a coma?” I breathe out in a whisper, the nurse twists around and her eyes softening as she looks at me

“Oh hon’, no he’s just had some pain meds and is still sleeping through, he’s getting there.” She peers down at the clipboard in her hands looking it over and carries on “as long as he doesn’t get an infection or anything he should be good to go probably in a couple of days all depending on if he has care at home. from what I can see he lives alone.”

“Well, that’s why I’m here, I’m his daughter and I’ll be taking care of him.”

“Lolly? Is that you?” A growly voice comes from the bed and uses my pet name, whipping my eyes to see my dad’s eyes staring up at me with bleary eyes but the love shining in them. Rounding the bed, I drop to my knees and wrap my arms around him careful to miss the bandaging I gasp out with thick emotion choking me, but I’m able to say

“Yeah Daddy, I’m here.” I just bask in the feel of my dad’s hugs; whether they aren’t as tight as they usually are and inhale some of that familiar scent that smells all my dad there’s nothinglike being in his arms; yup once a daddy’s girl always a daddy’s girl no matter how old I get.

“Fuckin’ daddy? Shit! It must be bad if you’re calling me daddy.” He tries to chuckle, but winces instead but his good hand grabs mine, “god it’s good to see you darlin’… I take it your Mom didn’t come?” he asks me the flicker of hurt comes across his eyes; I just shake my head in response.

“No just me, she couldn’t make it but I’m staying until you’re better Dad… okay?”

“Baby girl nothing would make me happier than having you back at the house, but first can you call that nurse back?”

“Daddy…what is it? Is something wrong?” I ask panicked

“Yeah, I’m good-“

“What is it? Maybe I can help.”

“Nahh nothing, I’m just not ready for you to wipe my ass yet.” He grins up at me with his twinkle in his eyes as I roll my eyes at his reply and squark out.

“Dad!”