Page 68 of Toxic Hope
“I want to start living more,” she explains. “Do things I’ve missed, make friends and be normal. I don’t want to sit around until I die.”
“We can definitely make that happen,” Easton says.
“Yes, we will, together,” I add. I’ll do whatever it is, as long as we’re doing it as one.
28
EMMA
Two weeks have passed since I told the guys everything. They have kept their promise and spend every free minute with me. They took me to the new treatment, held my wig back when I got sick after, rubbed my back and took care of me. They even held my hand when I finally confessed the news to Grandma.
I told her what the doctor said, and we cried until we had no tears left. Then we decided that it’s enough with the sadness and time to fight. I’m not giving up, and I won’t let the doctor’s timeline haunt me.
It’s not even an hour into the party at Briggs’s and Wren’s house when I come to an unsurprising conclusion: I’ve been missing out on a lot.
I mean, I knew that. And it’s not like I didn’t deliberately lock myself away from the world so I could keep my secret safe. But sitting here on the back patio, surrounded by people, laughing and swimming and having fun… I can’t help but wonder how much more I’ve missed.
Except for a few curious looks when we first got here, everybody’s been pretty accepting. At least that’s how they seem. Like they were all following somebody else’s lead, and now that the Scott twins have accepted me, they can do the same.
I don’t really care about all those people. I do care about the twins’ core group of friends, though, who seem a lot more genuine. “Are you having a good time?” Elliana asks from where she sits on Carter’s lap.
“Give her room to breathe,” Carter murmurs, grinning my way. “Don’t shine a spotlight on her.”
“It’s all right,” I offer. It’s not easy to speak up, but the more I do it, the easier it feels to be a part of things. “And Iamhaving a good time, thanks. This is the first party I’ve been to since we moved here.” I can’t remember the last party I went to before that, but nobody needs to hear my sob stories.
Maya and Tucker join us, both dripping from the pool. “Where are you keeping the towels?” Tucker asks, shaking his head like a dog, so beads of water fly in all directions.
“Watch it!” Preston growls. “If you want to get somebody wet, your girlfriend is right there.” He jerks his chin at Maya, who scowls.
“You are such a poet.” She squeezes water out of her hair before she starts shaking out her curls. “I can totally see why Emma wants to spend time with you.”
“I already told him he should be a lawyer.” Giggling, I shrug. “But he could definitely write greeting cards, too.”
“That might not be a bad business idea,” Briggs muses, handing Easton a fresh beer before taking a gulp of his own.
“We could call them Fuck You Cards, Incorporated,” Preston muses with a grin. “Honest cards. None of this flowery bullshit that nobody actually means in the first place.”
“You could probably make some money off that,” Maya reluctantly agrees before Briggs directs them to the pool house where extra towels are kept. Tucker smacks Maya’s ass on the way there, and she swats his arm away while her laughter rings out over the noise filling the air.
It’s nice. Seeing the two of them so natural together, happy. I wonder if I’ll ever get to that point with the twins, just like I wonder whether or not anyone is going to say anything about me being with the two of them. I’m still waiting for a mean comment. It has to be coming eventually, right?
Then again… everybody’s been pretty cool so far tonight. I’m sitting between Preston and Easton, and neither of them is shy about rubbing the back of my neck or resting their hand on my thigh if they feel like it. Nobody seems to care either way. They just… accept it.
Could it be that easy? It’s hard to imagine when there’s been so much in my life that has gone poorly and been so challenging. I’m like an animal that’s been abused for too long. Hand-shy. Waiting for something bad to happen.
As it turns out, somethingdoeshappen. It’s not necessarily bad, but it’s not positive, either.
“What the hell is she doing here?” Easton pops up from his chair, followed by Preston. They’re looking toward the door leading into the kitchen. A pretty girl with long, dark waves and familiar dark eyes is standing on the patio, her head swinging in all directions like she’s looking for somebody.
“Isn’t Sarah a little young to be hanging out here?” Carter asks.
This isSarah? “Take it easy on her,” I urge, following them when they march in her direction. Poor thing. Nobody wants to be bitched out in front of a bunch of people. She’ll be so embarrassed.
Only she doesn’t act defensive when they approach. “There you are!” Close up, I see the trails of tears on her cheeks. “I remembered hearing you saying you were coming here tonight. Thank god I found you.” She’s breathing fast, hard, looking over her shoulder like she’s scared.
That’s all it takes for their anger to turn into something else. They move in close to her, one on either side. “What’s the matter?” Preston asks.
“What happened? What can we do?” Easton won’t take his eyes off her. I can feel the protective energy radiating from him.
