Page 36 of Stay with Me
Hearing the front door open, Drew took a step in that direction. Brody looked like a feather could knock him down. Drew double-timed to his side and slid an arm around Brody’s waist. He led him to the couch and helped him sit. Brody had a goose egg on the right side of his head. Smokey moved to Brody and sniffed him up and down before leaning his head against Brody’s knee. Brody dropped a hand to Smokey’s neck.
“Can I get you something before I leave?” Drew asked.Yup, ripping the Band-Aid off.
“Leave? Christ, maybe I do have a concussion if I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Brody said as he pulled his hand from Smokey to lay it against his head.
“Figured I’d get on the road to Kentucky sooner rather than wait.” Drew was going to take this like a man. He wasn’t going to shrug off his failings. “There’s no way that you’re going to stay with a fuck-up like me.”
He watched as Brody frowned, his eyes going from side to side, like he was trying to remember something. “Drew, I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about. My head is still splitting from hitting the ground when I realize it was Jared on the gurney. Not my finest moment in the ER. Cap putme through concussion protocol and cleared me so it’s not this bump on my head. Of course, I’m not guaranteeing that something isn’t loose in my brain. Now, I need cuddles and you’re on deck for that.”
Fuck, Brody wasn’t going to make this easy on him. Drew backed up from the couch. Smokey began to pace between Drew and Brody. The poor dog didn’t know what he was supposed to do. Drew motioned with his hand and Smokey dropped to his stomach in a rest position. Perfect. Now he had a retired MWD confused. Only he could make such an epic mistake.
“You deserve someone who will be strong by your side. Someone who doesn’t fuck up everything he touches. Someone who is as smart, courageous, and resilient as you are. I’m none of these things. I’ve been faking it for my entire life and I’m not going to make you pay the price. Jared already has,” Drew said with a finality.
Brody put his hands on either side of his body and pushed himself off the couch. He stepped into Drew’s personal space and leaned his forehead to Drew’s. “You did not fuck anything up. Not during your life and certainly not now. It isnotyour fault that Jared was attacked. Did you hit him repeatedly in the face?” Brody asked not waiting for Drew to answer. “Did you kick him multiple times in his ribs fracturing four of them?” Another pause. “Did you stomp on his pelvis hard enough to break it?”
“You know I could never do that to a stranger, never mind someone that I know,” Drew answered, closing his eyes. He couldn’t look into Brody’s. This was hard enough for him to do without watching the hurt that was appearing in Brody’s eyes.
“Then you didn’t fuck up anything. Did this have something to do with what happened to Jared before? We don’t know, and we might never know. Everything was handled by the book when Jared filed the report for abuse. We know Provo went to prison;is still in prison. I know deep in my soul that you did everything you could for him. Now, please, can we sit down and nap?” Brody asked as he held out a hand to Drew.
Drew opened his eyes and looked down at Brody’s hand. He gripped it in his and leaned in to place a soft kiss on Brody’s lips. One last taste of this man that would always hold his heart. When he pulled back, Drew whispered, “I will always love you. You are my heart. I don’t know that I’m deserving of you. I need to figure that out.” Before Brody could respond, Drew signaled to Smokey and walked out the door with the dog trailing him.
§ § § §
The ringing of his phone woke Brody but he didn’t reach for it. There was no one he wanted to talk to. He felt like shit. His head was pounding. His face was heated and when he touched it he could feel the tears that had dried. He’d been abandoned again. Christ, he knew the saying ‘fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me,” but what was it when you’d gone through it more than that?
His phone rang again. What. The. Fuck. Whoever was blowing his phone up needed to go away. He was off for the next week and he was going to wallow for the entire time. The phone stopped and then started right up again. Shit! What if it was the hospital and something happened to Jared?
“Lieutenant Walker,” he said after pushing the answer button, not looking at screen. It didn’t matter who was on the other end.
“Where are you? Are you okay? Why didn’t you call me when you were in the ER as a fucking patient!?!” Nova yelled at him over the line.
He did not have the energy to deal with Nova right now. No matter how much she might care about him. “Nova, I’llcall you in the next few days, okay? I just need to rest.” Even heartbroken, he was being all polite and all.
“Aren’t you and Drew leaving today for Uncle Mackey’s?” she asked. Guess he’d slept longer than a nap. Made complete sense that his neck hurt in addition to his head if he spent the night on the couch.
Fuck. Nova wasn’t his family, why was it his job to tell her that Drew left? Taking a deep breath, Brody said, “Drew must be there already. He left yesterday after I got home. Told me I was better off without him.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” The disbelief in Nova’s tone made him smile. He was going to miss talking with her. “What do you mean he left yesterday without you? Did he get hit upside the head too? Leaving you when you have a concuss—”
Brody cut her off. “I don’t have a concussion. Cap cleared me.”
“Fine, no concussion but you’re hurt and he should be waiting on you hand and foot. And what bullshit was he spouting when he said you were better off without him?” Nova argued. “I’m sending out a group text. Drew needs an intervention.”
“No! Please, no. I’m obviously not good enough to keep around. I thought I’d gotten over being thrown to the wayside but…” Brody wasn’t going to beg to be in someone’s life. He needed to focus on his career. Maybe look at getting certified in trauma care. If he was lonely, it was between him and himself.
Nova was quiet on the other end. Brody was about to check if the call had dropped when he heard her say, “I will let it be for now but hear me and hear me clearly. You and Drew belong together and if I have to call everyone in to make you both see what we all see, I will. You check in with me or Mom over the next few days so we know you’re okay.”
Brody felt tears start to fall. Fuck. He thought he’d cried himself out. Now Nova with her quiet resolve and caring had him breaking again.
“I’ll try,” he said softly.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Drew felt someone behind him but didn’t turn around. Guess they’d noticed he hadn’t arrived in Kentucky. Smokey didn’t react from his position at Drew’s side so it was someone who he didn’t see as a threat. He just stood where he was, rain soaking him from head to toe, staring at the headstone in front of him. COLONEL ANDREW O’CONNOR, VIETNAM. He’d been here many times in his life; the first time he was too tiny to remember.
“You know how many times I’ve heard the story about Tristan walking behind the casket with you and my father and my other uncles?” Drew was pretty sure that it was Uncle Mooney standing there so quietly. It had to be him. He was the only one in the area. Cam was on the road with the team. Tris was in Arizona teaching something. He didn’t think they would send Noah or Rem after him. Not waiting for his uncle to say anything, he started rambling.
“Tris was wearing Papa’s Stetson. Good little soldier even then. Went to West Point. Major before thirty-four. On track to pin on full bird before thirty-eight. Must be in his genes, right? Colonel Andrew O’Connor as his grandfather. His father a member of the esteemed heptad.” Drew paused as Smokey whined and leaned against him. He dropped his hand to Smokey’s head and continued, “Yeah, I’m not sure about those genes. I definitely didn’t get any of them. Won’t even make captain at this rate. Maybe Tris took all the ambition and brains. Left nothing much for me and Julia. Oh no, wait! Julia’s a successful accountant. So, she got some. Must be that nothing was leftover for the good colonel’s namesake except his name. Probably wouldn’t be too impressed with me these days.”
