Page 95 of Wicked Tides
“Ahnah,” I muttered.
She sat back from her drawing and folded her legs beneath her, wiping her blackened fingers on her skirts. I stepped closer, sitting down on the floor and leaning against the opposite wall.
“I wish we could understand each other,” I said. “So I can tell you how truly sorry I am. Oweh.” Her eyes fluttered up toward me. “Tia paloei. For Sakari. Oweh.”
Little glistening tears formed in her big eyes as the words reached her. She stared at me, her lips slowly parting, and blinked, letting a couple of those tears trickle down her cheeks. And then she stooped forward and crawled on her hands and knees toward me, curling herself up in my lap. I stiffened at first, but when I realized she wascrying, I couldn’t help myself. I wrapped my arms around her and I squeezed, pulling her close.
I’d failed her. I wasn’t sure if she really knew it, but I had and I hated myself for it. But I wouldn’t fail her again. I would see her home. I would see her removed from the horror and death that haunted the water like I wished someone would have saved me as a child.
As Ahnah wept quietly against my chest, Meridan found her way to us. I found her staring quietly at the weeping girl in my arms, her head cocked. Maybe she agreed with my need to be with Ahnah. Maybe she didn’t. But then she locked eyes with me and gave me the subtlest nod of approval. I didn’t want to be at odds with my only remaining sister and the only person I could trust. That acceptance was everything.
Meridan left me there with Ahnah that night. Uncomfortable as I was against that wooden wall with no bedding for my bones, I didn’t want to be anywhere else. I couldn’t imagine it. I felt my own sadness in Ahnah that night and I’d wished a thousand times before that someone—anyone—would cradle me while I felt it.
I had never been allowed to feel it. To feel was practically a crime. I’d never gotten the chance to let it pass through me. It simply remained, growing and rotting and killing me. Now, I was a husk of the child I was and all I could do was feel that lost sorrow through Ahnah’s tears. And it was there in our shared pain that I found sleep.
Until those horrendous, toxic tones found their way into my slumber like the barbs of a sea urchin. Wet fingers gripped me, pulling me somewhere I didn’t want to go. All was black and I felt the pressure of the deep sea squeezing my lungs.
Was it real or was it a dream? Was Ahnah still in my arms?
Meridan,I called out, finding I had no voice.Meridan!
Father is hungry, Dahlia,said a deep, unnatural voice.
Those fingers touched me everywhere. My arms. My face. They slid into my mouth. Into my throat. They gripped my jaw and pried apart my teeth. They ventured lower, finding places I desperately didn’t want them to find. And yet it was still dark. Cold. Stifling. Iscreamed, but no voice came out. I wanted to move, but nothing happened. I felt their cold presence in my bones. In my stomach. In my lungs. In my womb.
I needed someone to hear me. Terror crashed through me like a wave of burning flames and his name rolled from my tongue in a panic.
Vidar!
~ 34 ~
Vidar
What we love most goes unrealized
Until we’ve lost it and know not what to do
~ Lady Madeline
It was late in the night when I finally settled in my cabin. Sleep did not come easy with the images of those vile creatures devouring Collin’s crew like a swarm of ravenous sharks. The seas had become twice as dangerous with their presence.
But they were not the only things haunting my thoughts. I found myself lying on my bed and staring at lines of moonlight from my window. The clear skies were unusual and welcome that night. Seeing the blue light on my walls made me think of Dahlia’s pale skin, though, and the brilliant, dangerous grey color of her eyes.
I found myself trying to sleep with visions of her behind my lids and the sound of her voice in my ears. Dahlia, who’d haunted me since I was a boy only possessed me as an adult. I hadn’t escaped her. I wondered if I ever would.
The deeper I fell into sleep, the more she took up space my thoughts. I could hear her breathing as if she were lying beside me andsomehow, it lulled me into a deeper slumber. Each time I took a breath, she let one out. And as I exhaled, she breathed in. My heart slowed and I felt my body melting into my bedding as the ship rocked upon mild-mannered waves.
Please,whispered a voice. Her voice.I’m afraid.
I was partially conscious, my mind floating between dreams and reality and the voice felt the same. It felt like a ghost.
Vidar,she said, her voice a soft whimper.Please. Help me.
I opened my eyes to the sound of crashing waves and rolling thunder. I was on that black sand beach, soaked to the bone by pounding rain. I rose to my feet, a stabbing chill coursing through my blood. I could barely see. The chaos came so abruptly. Waves pummeled the sharp stones further down the beach, sending icy sea spray into the air.
“What the fuck,” I hissed.
It was a dream. I knew it was a dream.
