Page 52 of Mystique of the Fallen
“You’re not. I’m not ready to nod off yet either.”
“Good, I love any opportunity to get to know you better.”
Although Roman was willing to open himself like a book to Grant, he hoped they wouldn’t touch on the one subject he wasn’t ready to discuss yet. Thankfully, his entire family had easily avoided any mention of Roman’s previous mate. In the past week, it’d become clear that the human Grant was a far different person from the often-smiling fallen knight who’d taken his place.
Roman hadn’t known his former mate well, but what he’d learned he hadn’t liked much—something he’d barely admitted in the past. The old Grant had been sullen and stuck on the notion that Roman was some strange zombie, and it’d been hard for Roman to imagine them overcoming the many hurdles in front of them. However, he remained angry that someone had murdered Grant.
As much as Roman was grateful for the Venerable Knight with happiness lighting his lime-green eyes and the small smile playing around his enticing mouth, he hated that a life had had to end in order for him to find himself with this new version of his other half.
“What’s the frown for?” Grant asked.
Roman quickly cleared his thoughts and mentally chastised himself for getting caught up in things he didn’t want to share. Scrambling for something to say, Roman decided to tease Grant.
“Maybe I’m jealous of this relationship you’re clearly set to develop with Alaric.”
Grant rolled his eyes. “First, he’s the ruler of the race we co-protect the Council with, so it’d be stupid of me not to build a relationship with him. Second, why would you be jealous of a man so obviously besotted with Chander?”
“I’m not worried about Alaric. You were the one practically jumping up and down to volunteer to spar with him. Alaric’s undefeated with his daggers. Only masochists volunteer to cross blades with him.”
“Maybe I’m a masochist,” Grant replied with a chuckle. “Honestly, I like the man. His grumbling about fallen knights is hysterical for some reason. Maybe because he’s literally complaining about a race the man he loves created. Do you think he’s the one with some deep-seated jealousy about that? Like he’s upset that Chander puts in so much effort to create new fallen knights and remains involved enough that he knows us all by name? Names he personally picks. Makes me wonder why he chose Grant for me. Was it because I looked like a Grant, or did he already have the name picked out and it was destined for the first guy of my class he resurrected?”
“I didn’t give the naming thing a lot of thought, but I know he picks them out before resurrection day. Arvandus was supposed to be something else…Titus, maybe? But Arvandus insisted on being called Vann. Of course, that was because he remembered that part of his name from his life as a sentinel.”
“How weird was that for you? Like you called him Vann for centuries, then suddenly he was Arvandus. Did you ever slip up?”
Roman shook his head. “As his best friend, it’s my job to give him shit, so I did tease him at the beginning about his big name change when we found out he was really Arvandus, but I was never going to call him Vann again. To me, that would be disrespecting his journey and who he truly was. So, the minute he told us about being Arvandus, I switched to it immediately. I spent hours that night repeating Arvandus in my head too many times to count to get myself used to it. By the way, your theory about Alaric is hilarious. And plausible.”
“Maybe someday I’ll be brave enough to say it to his face,” Grant replied. “Or, you know, maybe not.”
“Good luck with that.”
“Were you and Arvandus close from the start?”
“Yeah. I can’t imagine anyone not wanting to be friends with him. But I haven’t always been the best pal. I’ve taken him for granted. He hates being by himself. We tried living together, but I wasn’t considerate enough. He didn’t like having strangers traipsing through the apartment. I should’ve respected that and kept my partying or whatever you want to call it away from our place so we could’ve stayed living together.”
“You mean all the men you snuck in to play with?”
Roman smirked. “It wasn’t just men.”
“Oh, really? Do tell.”
“Nope,” Roman replied and grinned at Grant’s scowl. “No way am I giving you any other details.”
“Since you’re not exclusively attracted to men, were you surprised to find your mate was male?”
“No. I was open to whatever Fate wanted for me. It’s the inside of a person that matters, not their equipment. But I had a feeling it’d be a guy. I don’t know. Maybe Fate gave me that little nugget of information or something. Or I assumed that because all my closest friends are with guys.”
“Despite my lack of expertise in this area, I agree wholeheartedly with your statement about what matters. I want your heart and soul, Roman. The dick I’ve fantasized about in the past week is just a bonus. And it pleases me to know you weren’t disappointed that you were paired with me.”
“I’m not disappointed to be with you. Far from it. Also, don’t bring my dick into this conversation,” Roman said, releasing his hand only long enough to reach out and caress Grant’s chin.
“Can I bring it into my mouth instead?”
Roman laughed. “Nice try.”
“Do you think you were ready for a mate, or were you upset that your adventurous days had to come to an end?”
“They’d already ended. I didn’t make a conscious decision to try celibacy. But something changed inside me. It wasn’t quick like a switch,” Roman replied, snuggling further into his pillow as he stared into Grant’s inquisitive gaze. “I’m not sure how it started, but by the time Drystan had met Conley, I’d lost this snarky, rude part of me that secretly felt a little sorry for anyone tied down to a single person. I watched their love bloom, and it exploded into a tight closeness once their memories were restored. Here was this legendary couple that had overcome death to be together. That’s when I discovered the dreamy part of me. I thought their story was so hauntingly romantic.”
