Page 38 of Unsettled
“But…”
“Stay with Jude, you’re still the Boss, Roman. Help Jude and Benjamin with organizing the men.”
“Stay on the line?”
“Of course, Amore. I’m not going anywhere.”
Some knot unlocks in my chest. Knowing that, for now, he doesn’t blame me for the state our lover is in. I have enough guilt for all four of us, anyway. The crushing, oppressive feeling threatens to keep me on my knees, but as Dad stands, he takes me with him. When he staggers, I jolt into action, steadying him.
“You’re not okay.”
He gives a small, tired smile. “I am; don’t worry about me. Tennant is more important.”
Before I can argue, the medical teams rush in and prepares Lio and Ten for transport, and I kick myself once again for forgetting Lio also got hurt.
They whisk Lio off before I can check on him, but I have to believe he’ll be okay. Soren wouldn’t let anything happen to him. And with Il Padrone riding along, he’ll fight. Right? So close to his Master, he wouldn’t give up the fight now.
“Ti voglio bene,” Dad says, pressing a kiss to my hair, before letting me go. “I’ll go with him. I'll remind the fucker he can’t leave me to this hell alone.”
Vaguely, I realize I never told Dad the plan. Either someone else filled him in, or his instinct of being a Boss is more honed than mine.
I want to hold on, to beg him to stay with me, to tell him that he can’t leave my sight after just getting him back, but that’s notfair. I don’t deserve his comfort, not when I might have killed his soulmate.
So I let him go, taking with him a broken piece of my heart.
Standing in the middle of the chaos, I’ve never felt so alone, so…lost.
I know people are waiting for me, that I need to stand in front of the men I led into this battle and give them a reason to follow me back home, but how can anyone trust me when I can’t even protect those closest to me?
Failure.
Inadequate.
Not fit to be the Boss.
The weight of my knife is heavy in its sheath at my hip. And for a moment, I wonder if anyone would notice if I used it on myself…
“I’m here, Roman,”Hollis’s voice knocks me out of my dark thoughts.“Go finish this, Little Prince.”
Tennant’s nickname for me spurs me into action, and I look for Jude and Benjamin, finding them ordering people around, looking in their element as they do so, acting like the Seconds they are.
Taking a breath, I let Hollis’s words, and the weight of Tennant’s expectations for me, buoy me into seeing this out.
Two pairs of green eyes meet mine when I join them, both looking as determined as I want to be, and as devastated too.
Strength in numbers and all that.
We’re stronger together than apart, we’ve proven that. Martelli and Amato. We didn’t find two, just to lose two others.
No, this isn’t the end, not for us. My time as Amato Boss isn’t over, and it’s time I prove it, no matter how undeserving I might be…
The moment bullets hit my Emilio, all of my breath leaves me. I pull at the manacles, not giving a shit if I’m injuring myself. My only goal is to get to my love, as he spins around from the impact, his body hitting the cement floor, and then…there’s no. Fucking. Movement.
My mind fractures, like glass being hit with a sledgehammer. There’s nothing there. I barely notice Tennant going down. The screams around me. The bullets hitting our fucking captor. Everything is in slow motion, compared to the man on the ground bleeding out. It’s pooling so fucking fast.
There’s a horrid keening, a scream of rage, that I don’t recognize. Only when Benjamin steps in front of me and pushes me back do I realize it’s coming from me.
Fuck.
