Page 1 of Messy AF
one
~ Tobias ~
Groaning,Iblinkedmyeyes open, coming awake with an all-too-familiar sense of disorientation.
A sea of ash gray filled my vision, the hardwood gleaming in the sunlight that spilled through the windows. The plush fibers of the area rug rubbed against my cheek, and that weird carpet smell tickled my nose.
Carefully, I rolled onto my back, pleased to find that nothing hurt. I didn’t remember passing out, but I must have been aware enough to make it safely to the floor.
This time.
I hadn’t always been so lucky in the past, and I had the bruises to prove it. Waking up only inches from the heavy cedar chest that doubled as my coffee table, however, proved just how much worse it could have been.
As in, I might not have woken up at all.
With a quiet grunt, I pushed into a sitting position and bent my knees, bringing them to my chest. Although the elf at theapothecary had assured me that the side effects of the sleeping potion would wear off in a couple of weeks, I was starting to wonder if I would make it that long.
The whole thing had started innocently enough. After weeks of tossing and turning, I had just wanted a decent night’s sleep. I still didn’t know what exactly had triggered my insomnia, but I had tried every over-the-counter and homeopathic remedy under the sun without success.
Desperation had led me to the apothecary, and to some…questionable decisions. Mr. Rohdair, the ancient elf who owned the shop, had assured me the sleep potion was safe and effective for humans.
I probably should have read the fine print.
While the tonic had certainly been successful—I’d slept for a solid sixteen hours that first night—the side effects had been unexpected.
The dizziness and nausea hadn’t necessarily surprised me. I could probably even deal with the wobbly legs and random ringing in my ears. The exhaustion, however, had been next-level.
With one tiny vial, I had gone from being unable to sleep for more than an hour at a time, to falling asleep whether I wanted to or not.
No amount of caffeine could counteract the drowsiness. Exercise only made the problem worse. When it hit, seemingly nothing could stop it. In the days since it had started, I’d sort of learned to recognize the signs, at least to some degree.
In the beginning, though, it had led to some pretty dangerous situations.
I had fallen asleep in the shower. I’d dozed off while cooking. I had woken up on my front porch surrounded by scattered envelopes after checking my mail.
While I believed the effects of the potion would eventually fade, it had become increasingly obvious that I couldn’t keep going like this.
Since I lived alone, if something serious happened, no one would be there to help me. On the other hand, I didn’t want to burden my friends or family by asking them to drop everything and babysit me. Especially when I had no idea how long I would require their assistance.
I didn’t need a live-in nurse or a home health professional. Just someone to aid with basic tasks and make sure I didn’t crack my head open when an unscheduled nap struck. Someone with built-in safeguards so I could feel at ease having them in my home.
Pushing to my feet, I took my time, testing my steadiness before moving to the sofa to retrieve my phone from the armrest. Then I curled into the corner of the sectional and brought up the MNSTR app.
The Magical Network of Specialized Task Resources connected shadelings and humans for an array of different jobs that ranged from practical to wildly arcane. From repairing leaking faucets to warding homes with protection sigils, the app had an agent for just about everything.
When I had first moved into the two-bedroom cottage on the outskirts of Circle City, I had hired a warlock to purge the negative energy from any previous tenants. Once a month, I contracted a nixie to deep clean the cottage with enchantments rather than chemicals.
I had even paid for premium services, like having tapas portaled directly from Spain, just for the experience. It had been worth every penny.
Rather than wasting time searching categories and reading reviews of agents, I immediately opened the chat feature. It had been surprisingly helpful in the past, and if nothing else,I figured the MNSTR bot could at least point me in the right direction.
TOBIAS:I need a live-in caretaker for a week, maybe two, while I recover.
The response came immediately.
MNSTR:Oh, being sick or injured is the worst. That must be incredibly frustrating, but don’t worry. We’ll find someone to help you. Can you tell me more about your situation or preferences so I can recommend the perfect agent for the job?
I paused to think about it, realizing I didn’t entirely know what I needed beyond general help. Should I ask for someone who knew basic first aid? Did I want someone who could cook? Or just another body nearby so I didn’t burn down the kitchen?
