Page 1 of Promised Summer
Chapter One
JONES
Have you ever felt like you were standing in a pile of quicksand, panicked about the fact you’re about to be swallowed by the sand, but also resigned to your fate because you can’t see a way out?
No? Just me?
It was a unique experience for sure, which was why I was currently drinking alone at a pub far outside my town’s limits and away from the nosy townspeople, all to avoid going home to my loving boyfriend.
Deke was great. He could be a little spoiled at times, but it was nice to feel needed. We’d been dating for almost a year and a half at this point, and he’d moved into my cabin about four months ago.
I thought everything was on track. Deke and I were good together. We made sense as a couple, so the next natural progression of things was marriage…right?
But no matter how often Deke nagged about meproposing, I just couldn’t do it. I loved the feeling of being needed by him, especially when most of the people around me didn’t need me. It was the reason why, even though I didn’t do serious relationships, I’d agreed when he asked to be exclusive.
My older brother was the person everyone went to. He was the reliable one, the caretaker, and he was one of the best fucking people I knew, too. Me on the other hand, I was the baby of the family. Growing up with the overachiever wasn’t the easiest either. It was made harder as the miracle of the family. I was the child that almost wasn’t meant to be, as my mama liked to say, so it was normal for them to be overly protective of me.
So, yes, I loved being needed by Deke and feeling like I was more than just the child my parents would always see me as. I might even love Deke too…
God, I was a horrible boyfriend. To not even know if I loved my partner of over a year…the quicksand was quickly dragging me below.
“How’s it going here, hon?” The perky brunet bartender stopped in front of me, where I’d been nursing the same beer for the past hour or two. He took one look at me, and something similar to sympathy showed on his face.
A rag magically appeared from somewhere, and he started wiping the bar. I was really starting to think rags were a bartender’s special item. Like it would poof out of nowhere at their command.
“Do you want to talk about it?” the bartender’s voice cut through my thoughts of magical rags.
I’d heard it was sometimes easier to spill your guts to total strangers than your friends, but it wasn’t like I couldn’t talk to my friends about how I was feeling. My best friend, Ryker, would never judge me.
We’d been friends since we were kids, and he’d always been there for me. Even though I knew he didn’t like Deke, he was still supportive of me and only wished for my happiness.
It wasn’t just him, but Dan and Clay as well. They were my people, and I was lucky to have them. But now I couldn’t even remember the last time we all hung out together.
Ryker and I saw each other most days since we worked together, but outside of that, we barely hung out anymore. I tried to blame it on the fact that he was currently busy basking in this new normal with the love of his life, but I knew it was mainly my fault we didn’t get together like we used to.
My friends didn’t think too highly of Deke, but the sentiment went both ways. And when Deke first moved in with me, he would get angry on the nights I went out with them, so I stopped. I figured once he got settled in, things could go back to normal, but instead, the sand kept piling up until I found myself in a new normal, wading in the quicksand.
How had things gotten to this point?
Spilling my heart out to the bartender certainlywasn’t going to fix anything, so why bother? Instead, I thanked him, paid my tab, and left.
The drive back home to Kither Springs passed quickly. It always did, with our town being surrounded by some of the most gorgeous views I’d ever seen. Soaring mountains nestled in the distance, fields blooming with flowers that filled the air with a sweet scent, and the strong summer sun making the already brilliant sights sparkle.
Summer used to be my favorite time of the year as a child. No school, and my days occupied only by playing with friends. My summers were filled with carefree explorations of the great outdoors and a boy with eyes as blue as the endless sky.
Sometimes they still haunted me. A haze of blue when I looked up, a reminder that even when I was flying high, some things would always remain out of reach.
The lights weren’t on at the cabin when I arrived home, which was strange considering it was only seven-thirty. When I messaged Deke earlier to say I’d be late tonight, he said he’d be waiting at home.
I figured Deke was tired and went to sleep early, so I quietly made my way inside and walked to the bedroom in the dark. Some sleep would do me some good, too. I’d cuddle with my boyfriend and get a restful night, and that might finally help shake this funk that’d clung to me ever since Deke moved in.
My friend Ryker once made a comment aboutmoving too fast in my relationship with Deke, and maybe he was right? Maybe living together too soon was the whole reason quicksand started piling around my feet?
Nerves. That’s all this was.
Deke and I were good together. We made sense…
As I stepped closer to my closed bedroom door, a strange noise came from inside. It sounded like a…moan?Deke’smoan.
