Page 13 of The Alpha Experiment
He paused, his hands clenching and unclenching where they rested on his thighs.
“Pack takes care of pack,” he said more quietly. “And maybe you’re not officially in my pack, but it’s kind of shitty of you to act like taking an interest in, you know, keeping you alive makes me an asshole. It wouldn’t be cool for me to walk away when you need someone watching your back. You’d agree if you didn’t have your head so far up your ass about not being an alpha were.”
Thathit home, and the way he looked up at me as he finished, dark eyes fixed on me seriously, only hammered it in. I sputtered, opening and closing my mouth and feeling air go out but not able to make a sound.
Colin didn’t even sink to my level and make a fish joke.
He just looked at me.
I’d tried so hard not to harp on how I felt about being the only human out of four siblings. Yeah, my mom was human, but she’d expected to be born that way. And that didn’t count. I didn’t spend my whole life compared to my mom.
“I don’t have my head up my ass.” I winced as the words left my mouth; that wasn’t an apology, and getting defensive wouldn’t help. He was right, and I was being a dick. It got so tiresome being the weak link, though. He couldn’t possibly understand, no matter how well he understood me in general. “Okay, maybe I do. A little. But humans deal with this kind of situation, too. We—I mean, people who grew up around supernaturals—we don’t have a monopoly on stalkers or threats. Humans have to solve these problems without having alpha bodyguards. Those humans do okay. Why am I so pathetic that I need extra watching?”
Colin still hadn’t moved, his back against the door with his body as far from mine as he could manage without getting out of the car.
“You need extra watching because you’re the most import—” He stopped, his jaw clenched, and then started over. “You think regular old humans wouldn’t want an alpha were hanging around looking out for them if they could get one? You’re not pathetic. You’re lucky. Lucky to have a family who gives a shit, lucky to have—” He broke off with a frown, the lines around his mouth deepening, making him look older. More like a stranger and less like my friend.
Jesus, how long had it been since I’d actually seen Colin? A whole year, maybe? Definitely since before his pack war. Long enough that the responsibilities of being a pack leader had caught up with him, not just mentally, but visibly, too.
All my irritation drained away like he’d pulled the plug. Why did I keep getting so worked up with him? I knew him better than this.
I trusted him more than this.
What the hell was wrong with me?
Especially since…I was truly lucky, for the reason he’d stopped himself from saying.
It took all my courage to overcome my reluctance to say something so stupid and mushy, but I made myself. “I am lucky to have you. We both know it. You can just say it. I know that’s what you were thinking.”
The ghost of a grin flashed across his face. “Everyone thinks that.”
He didn’t quite hit the right note of cockiness, and it made me ache.
Everyone probably did think that. And if it’d been anyone but Colin, maybe that would’ve made me defensive.
But Colin really was that awesome, and letting myself forget it, even for bits and pieces of a day from hell, made me such an asshole, just like he’d said. I’d been enough of an asshole to even knock him down a peg. And Colin should never be less than cocky. It wasn’t him.
“I don’t care what anyone else thinks,” I said honestly. “I know I am. I’m really sorry. I’ve been such a dick today. Yes, I am so goddamn lucky to have an alpha werewolf following me around when I already have a stalker following me around. Reset? Get some coffee, get back to my place, nap, write my midterms?”
“The midterms are all you, dude.”
Probably for the best. I doubted Colin knew what a proton was offhand.
He relaxed a little at last, shifting around in his seat until he was facing forward again and putting his hand on the ignition.
I settled back in my own seat and picked up two pairs of the crappy sunglasses, handing one to him. Our fingers brushed. It sent a shock of heat through my hand, arrowing up my arm, and burrowing into the center of me.
Colin fiddled with the key, staring straight ahead. “That was my imagination, right?” he asked quietly. “Thinking you were scared of me for a minute there?”
I swallowed hard around the guilty lump in my throat. “Yeah,” I lied. “Of course it was. Idiot.”
“Okay. Good.” Colin started the car. “Coffee. You’re buying.”
I smiled as I put the ugly sunglasses on, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly, letting my mind and body chill the hell out. “Deal.”
Chapter 5
Hold, Please
