Page 19 of The Alpha's Warlock
“Okay,” I said, clearing my throat. “So the pack leaders had a confab. Care to fill us lowly peons in?”
Matthew looked incredibly uncomfortable, shifting his feet a bit and frowning. Not a good sign. “Kimball says no one in his pack was involved in your kidnapping.”
I stood bolt upright, annoyance snapping my spine into rigidity. “Well, no shit he says that! It was either behind his back or he has good reasons for denying it, so —”
“Or no one in his pack was involved, Nate! It's possible he wasn't lying. I have to consider that.”
I gaped at him, hurt and betrayal welling up to the point that I was afraid they might overflow as actual tears. Of manly rage, of course, but still. It felt like being stabbed in the stomach. Ian had doubts about my story to begin with, but now they were both going to believe I'd what, made it all up in order to worm my way into their pack? That I had some agenda. That I was just like my father —
“Well, someone kidnapped Nate,” Ian put in firmly. “And he says it was weres, and he says he recognized the Kimball shaman. Not to mention, I smelled weres on him when I found him, and the scents were familiar. So maybe you should 'consider' that Kimball's full of shit or that he's getting played by his own pack council, because those look like the only two real possibilities to me.”
Ian shot me the quickest look, just a darting glance before he fixed his eyes on his brother again. And he took one small step, away from Matthew and toward me.
I nearly melted into the floor, or threw my arms around him and kissed him. I didn't, but it was close. And I vowed silently, then and there, that the next time Ian was a complete asshole I'd remember this display of trust and loyalty and let it go. Maybe it was the mate bond, but I didn't think so. He'd been perfectly willing to give me crap all morning, and he’d told me to my face he thought I might be lying about the kidnapping two nights before. Either he’d changed his mind, or he had the kindness to have my back in public. Either way, right then he was my hero.
Matthew had the good grace to look a little sheepish as he glanced away, breaking first in his staring contest with Ian. “I'm not saying Nate wasn't kidnapped,” he muttered. Even though, you know, that was exactly what he’d said. “Just that Sam Kimball didn't know about it. Because I really don't think he did. And look,” he went on, meeting my eyes again, “isn't it possible it wasn't the Kimball shaman you saw? I'm not saying it wasn't werewolves or that there wasn't a shaman there. But could it have been a different one? Because what reason do the Kimballs have to target you?”
Some of my upset drained away. It was a little aggravating to have my memories questioned, but I had been drugged, chained, panicked, and cursed at the time. It wasn't an unreasonable question. So I closed my eyes and tried to picture the scene again, focusing on the shaman's face.
Dammit. It could've been that shaman, but he'd been in shadow most of the time, his features only picked out now and again by the flames in his casting bowl. I'd assumed it was him, because he'd looked enough like him and I didn't know of any other shamans in the area. That didn't mean there wasn't one.
“Yeah,” I said at last, with reluctance. I let out a long whoosh of breath. “Yeah. It could have been someone else. It looked like him, but it's not like I've spent a ton of time around the guy.”
“Good,” Matthew said, brightening. I bit my lip. Matthew was way, way too eager to believe the Kimballs had nothing to do with this. I got that — they were the closest pack to Armitage territory by far, and getting along with them was crucial to Matthew's pack's well-being — but it seemed more than a little naive. Or at least way too optimistic. “Then maybe —”
“Notgood,” Ian spat. “Goodwould be no one being kidnapped, cursed, or forced into mating bonds they hate.Goodand 'rogue shaman on the loose trying to turn warlocks into weapons to use against us' aren't even in the same universe, Matt! If it wasn't the Kimballs, it was someone else, and I could swear I smelled some of them. Either way, it's still notgood!”
I agreed with him. Fuck, did I ever agree with him, in every particular. Butforced into mating bonds they hateechoed in my ears, repeating over and over again. I'd known he wasn't exactly crazy about the idea. But forced? He feltforced? Had that been nonconsensual, in his mind, when I'd sunk down on his cock and kissed him?
Matthew had started yelling back, something about Ian being an idiot, and of course it was better if it wasn't the Kimballs because they would have the same interest in keeping other packs' shamans out of town that the Armitages did, allies, blah blah blah, and then Ian was shouting something about Matthew getting his head out of his ass.
Butmating bonds they hateandturn warlocks into weaponskept turning and turning in my mind. It hurt, and it sucked, and I hated being nothing but a pawn. Again. Ian hadn't wanted anything to do with me, and neither did that asshole shaman, really. I was a means to an end. No one thought I was good for anything except tobe a pawn.
And when I thought about it that way, it at least clarified the issue a little, if nothing else.
“Shut up, both of you.” They kept yelling. “Shut up!” I screamed, the words tearing out of my throat.
They'd turned to face each other, hands on their hips, and now they both turned their heads and glared at me.
“What?” Matthew demanded, clearly not so happy about being interrupted while he was building up a good head of steam. Well, screw him. He could trade insults with his brother on his own time.
“The result is the same,” I said quietly. Partly to irritate them, but partly because my voice felt as small and pathetic as the rest of me. It took real effort to get the words out. “It didn't have anything to do with me. We knew that from the start. Like Ian said, I was just a weapon. Maybe even a messenger, sort of.”
“A messenger?” Matthew made a face. “You heard them talking about their plans for you. You were supposed to be a spy, not tell us anything. That's kind of the point.”
I ignored how condescending he sounded. That was definitely not the point, no matter how it rubbed me the wrong way. “Yeah, it would be. If they thought I'd be any good as a spy.” I laughed, and it sounded as raw and bitter as I felt. “I think whoever took me, they had a few different plans, a few different ways I could pan out as a plant in your pack. One's obvious: earn your trust and kill you. But I don't think they thought I could really pull it off.” I thought back to the two weres who'd been talking: one of them cocksure and arrogant, the other a little less so. A little more thoughtful. “Or at least, one of them didn't. I think the real plan, or maybe the strong plan B, was that you'd figure it out. I'd crack, and fuck up, and be too weak to stand up to you. And then you'd have all the evidence you needed to start a war with the Kimball pack. If it’s the Kimballs behind this, then you’d be making yourselves the bad guys, and they could annihilate you without any other packs interfering.”
To my shock, Ian scoffed, finally turning from Matthew and letting their argument go. “Too weak? Haven't those morons seen what you can do?”
Oh, fuck, how I wished in that moment that Ian didn't hate me, because if he kept saying things like that, I’d start to…not-hate him. “Thanks,” I choked out. “But no. They haven't. And I appreciate the vote of confidence,” and gods did I ever, “but they wouldn't be totally wrong about that. I have a lot of power. I'm not so good at channeling it. And, you know. I'm not the kind of tough guy who laughs in the face of werewolf interrogation techniques.”
Matthew laughed and shook his head, dispelling what was left of the lingering tension. “That's a fancy way to describe popping out our claws and growling a lot.”
“Yeah, well,” I said, wishing I could laugh with him. “Either way, they probably thought I'd crack.”
“You showed them,” Ian muttered, giving me a little nod that looked oddly respectful. “Escaping like that.”
What the hell? I was getting whiplash. First he said he hated being with me, and then...this whole conversation was weird as fuck.
