Page 57 of Keep You Safe
“Your fears say otherwise, you mean.” I was as angry as I could remember being. I’d stayed calm in the face of the rudest of hotel guests, managed disasters and insults with a smile, shoved down endless irritation for so many years, yet I was powerless to manage my emotions around Grayson. “I’ve been nothing other than trustworthy the whole time I’ve been here. I don’t know how to make you trust me, but I do know one thing. You’re not pushing me away.”
“We can’t go on like this.” He made a vague gesture, encompassing the bed. “You said it yourself, you want more than some secret fling.”
“Oh, I agree. But you’re not chasing me back to LA.” I wagged a finger in his face. “I’m going to stay, and you can look at me every damn day and know how good we could be.” I stalked to the doorway of his room before pivoting to glare back at him. Damn him for not following me. “We could be so good.”
“Adler.” He made my name into a pained plea, but no way was I letting up now.
“You don’t believe me.” I pulled on my boots with shaking hands. “That’s okay. Maybe someday. Good night, Gray.”
I glanced one more time at the bed, memorizing him sitting there, a helpless, lost expression on his face. Twisting his hands in his naked lap, he clenched his eyes shut. Opened them.
“Be safe,” he whispered. He cared. That much I didn’t doubt, and that very caring frustrated me to the ends of the earth. My anger was righteous fuel as I headed into the cold for the short,frigid trek to the bunkhouse. The snow had ceased, which was good because my heart was icy enough.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Grayson
I wasa foul-tempered beast unsuited for human interaction. Hell, even the horses and cattle were sick of my mood. Not that ranch life allowed much time for wallowing. Amazingly, the stalls continued to need mucking, the horses seeing to, and the supplies ordering. Despite whatever falling out Adler and I’d had, time marched on. Maverick returned, and he and Adler were deep in the details of the dude ranch project. And if I pined terribly for Adler’s daily presence as a hand, I’d take that secret to my grave.
Friday came around, and I was in no mood to see him over dinner at the bunkhouse, listen to him joke with everyone other than me. Accordingly, I took myself to the one place he was unlikely to turn up and planted my ass in a back booth at the Lovelorn bar I infrequently patronized.
Hell, it had been months. Since before Adler came to town, and there I was thinking of him again as I nursed my beer. At least I was alone in my misery.
Rather, I was alone until Jude and Colt walked into the bar. Naturally, they made a beeline for my booth.
“What are you doing here?” I made no pretense at niceties as Colt slid in next to me. “Thought you were supposed to be basking in newlywed bliss now that you’re back from DC.”
“Hello to you too, Gray,” Colt drawled. “Maverick’s working late with Adler on the ranch guest project. Ran into Jude at the store. He asked about my brother’s progress and suggested a beer to catch up. We don’t keep alcohol in the house right now, so it sounded like a good idea to me.”
“You okay?” Jude took off his heavy coat and sat across from us, both of them apparently settling in for a nice, long chat. “You’ve been crankier than ever this past week or so.”
“I’m fine,” I growled. I wasn’t fine, but hell if I was admitting that. “Just needed a minute to myself.”
Neither took the hint, of course. Colt quickly fetched beers for himself and Jude before returning to needle me some more.
“Friends don’t let friends drink alone, even if you don’t wanna talk about the burr under your saddle.”
“What’s the latest on your brother?” I hadn’t had any success with my pointed looks and heavy hints, but perhaps a topic change would get me some breathing room.
“Carson’s medical discharge is in the works.” Colt sighed and took a long sip of his beer. “The plan is to eventually move him to Denver for more rehabilitation before we can bring him home to Lovelorn. He’s got a long road ahead of him.”
“I imagine so.” I gave a sympathetic nod.
“I’m most worried about Carson’s mental state, to be honest.” Colt spun the glass against the tabletop, moving the ring of condensation around. “The doctors are managing his physical recovery, but he’s been super discouraged and down. I’m not sure how to help with that.”
“When he makes it back to Lovelorn, I can hook him up with some veteran resources.” Jude leaned forward. “There’s a support group in Durango I go to sometimes. Might help.”
“I always forget you served.” Colt sounded surprised. While we were all friendly, Colt didn’t work as closely with Jude as I did, and Jude had been a couple of years behind him and Maverick in school.
“Million years ago.” Jude waved a hand. “Right out of high school. Needed money for college, and a recruiter convinced me that enlisting was a good way to go. Bad decision, but I got most of my undergrad out of the way while serving. Moved back to the area after veterinary school.”
“The area is lucky to have you.” Colt undoubtedly had picked up on the fact that Jude’s military service was not his favorite topic. “I’m sure my brother would appreciate any help with finding resources. He’s already worrying over what he’ll be able to do for work.”
“There’s always something on the ranch.” I hadn’t dealt much with Colt’s siblings, but he wouldn’t be the first friend’s brother I helped get along. “Tell Carson to worry about healing now, but between Maverick’s project and regular chores, I’d bet we could find him something.”
“Good idea.” Colt offered a grateful smile. “You’re going to need more hands, especially with Adler transitioning to running the guest program.”
“Yep.” I took the world’s slowest sip of my beer, trying not to bristle at the mention of Adler and likely failing.
