Page 31 of Saving Grace
“I have a bag stashed in the hall closet,” I whisper against her ear, causing goosebumps to spread down her arms.
“You gave me goosies,” she whispers breathlessly, her head rolling back to look up at me. Oh, how I’d love to hear her like that in another situation.
I shift my hips back, trying to keep the bulge in my shorts from pressing into Leila’s back, but she catches the movement. Before I can stop her, she shifts her hips to meet mine, a tiny moan escaping her lips as she succeeds in her mission to torture me.
Leila is quick. I barely catch her hand before it sneaks into my shorts, and the pout that takes over her face is enough to crack a smile on mine.
“This isn’t about me, Gracie. No matter how much I’ve missed your touch. Now, tilt your head back so I can wet your hair.”
She cuts her eyes at me, the pout turning into a scowl. “You don’t have to wash my hair.”
“Do you want me to stop?” I ask as my fingers begin massaging her scalp, her body becoming pliant in my hold. The pleasure sounds slipping from her throat have me questioning my resolve to keep this intimate moment innocent. “That’s what I thought.”
Leila remains quiet as I shampoo and condition her hair.
“Tilt back, baby,” I rasp as I rinse the remaining suds and sift a comb through the strands. She’s nearly asleep on her feet bythe time I cut the water off and wrap her in the fluffy towel I’d already set out for her. Once she’s wrapped like a burrito, I settle her on the closed toilet lid while I quickly dry off and hunt down my bag. Thankfully, Gavin and Kaia aren’t back yet. The last thing I need is having to explain how settling Leila post-panic turned into a shower together.
Once I have both of us clothed—Leila in the shirt I’d discarded earlier at her request—I settle us both on the couch. The silence is comfortable, how it’s always been with us. Leila curls into my side, her knees and feet tucked under my shirt.
“Why don’t you get some sleep?” I suggest. “I know you didn’t get any earlier, even if your brother thinks you were.”
Instead of arguing with me, she leans into my side in a pseudo-hug and whispers that same four-letter word. “Stay.”
I snag the blanket from the back of the couch and drape it over her before settling my arm around her and popping out the footrest. “Always, sunshine,” I say as I place a kiss on her forehead. My words are met with soft snores as her body finally submits to the adrenaline crash. “You’re stuck with me,” I whisper.
Chapter 16
Leila
Both legs bounce against the console of Drew’s truck as we pull into his parents’ gravel driveway, anxiety coursing through my body at an alarming rate. It’s weird. For some reason, it is unsettling to realize that the ranch house still looks the same as it did the last time I saw it. The white wraparound porch is pristine and accented with hanging plants, while a swing and rocking chairs occupy the larger corner. I used to love sitting out here, watching the sun set over the fields as the horses grazed. The sounds of town are distant, allowing nature’s smaller critters to be heard.
Peace. Something I used to know. Something I long to find again.
The last time I saw any of them was right after everything went down with the deadbeats.
Decade-old memories don’t soothe the tension in my gut. Some of it is residual from the panic attack earlier. While I was able to sleep off some of the weariness, I’m still a touch groggy. Drew tried to get me to reschedule this little get-together, if only until tomorrow, but I’ve already kept their granddaughter awayfor two months. Surely, there has to be some sort of animosity built up, even if his parents don’t want to admit it.
Hell, I hate myself for not doing more. For not calling Drew more often. For not checking in on him after I found out about his accident. For not making sure he and his family were a part of Kaia’s life from the beginning. Sure, I reached out a few times, but I could have tried harder. Could have called his mom or asked Kristen to tell him.
That’s on me, and I’ll have to live with the guilt that I deprived our daughter of the only grandparents she’ll ever know.
“Breathe, Leila Grace.” Drew’s voice startles me enough to bring my focus back to the passenger seat of his truck. It’s then I realize I’m gripping my seatbelt tight enough for my knuckles to turn white. His fingers gently pry mine loose before he wraps his much larger hand around mine and lifts it to press his lips along my knuckles. I suck in a breath at the intimacy but refuse to let myself shy away.
I said I was done running, and I meant it.
At least, I think I did.
I groan, my eyes closing as I lean back against the headrest. I’m borrowing panic from future situations. Therapy has at least taught me to recognize that much.
If I’m being honest with myself, I love the way he still treats me like I’m his without a second thought. It seems like it’s second nature for Drew still, which makes me feel not quite so far out of my element. Because I still catch myself wanting to say and do things that aren’t appropriate for us. Like staring at his ass as he walked away this morning, his Wranglers doing everything right in accenting his butt. He wasn’t cursed with no-ass-at-all disease like most guys around here. And the backward ballcap with all his little curlycues sticking out from underneath? Geeze, you’d think I was still that little fourteen-year-old with a crush on her best friend.
Now, I’m just a twenty-six-year-old single mom with a crush on her baby daddy.
“Mom’s excited to see Kaia again, and Dad is excited to meet her,” Drew says, pulling me from my thought spiral. “But if at any point this starts to become too much, just say the word and we’ll bounce. They’ll understand.”
I glance at the precious baby girl blowing bubbles in the back seat in the new car seat Drew must have had overnighted. She’s more than content after getting all the snuggles and sunshine she could handle from Uncle Gavin. “This is a good thing. The right thing,” I whisper, trying to convince myself as much as Drew.
He squeezes my hand again. “Just because something isrightfor one person, doesn’t mean it’s right for you, Leila.”
