Page 18 of Saving Grace
“You’re spacing. All good?”
“Oh. Yeah. Just finding some of this more challenging than I expected.”
“If this is about the car seat, I’m sorry if I overstepped—”
“No. It’s a good idea. A great one, really. My hormones just have my emotions all over the place.” Staring out the window as we drive the few miles down to Gavin’s, I try to sort through my thoughts. “I think it was relief. You just rolled with it.”
As we pull into the drive, Drew puts the truck in park and turns to me, taking my hands in his. “I’m in, Leila. As much in as you’ll let me be.”
The conversation pauses as Drew unbuckles Kaia’s carrier and loops his arm through the handle before grabbing her bag and walking up the drive to the front porch. I’m slow to get out of the truck, my gaze stuck on the sight before me.
From his hat to his boots and a baby on his arm, the man is sexy. He doesn’t even struggle with the awkward weight of the carrier, but it’s probably lighter than the hay bales he’s used to slinging. Shirtless and sweaty. Muscles rippling as he goes.
Reel it in, Leila Grace.Sheesh.
Quickening my steps, I slip in front of Drew and open the front door.
“You can set her carrier in the living room. I’m gonna change really quick.”
I snag the first shirt I find and swap it with the sweat-soaked one I’m wearing. This damn humidity is killing me. So are my boobs. By the time I slip back into the living room to convince Kaia to eat, Drew is on the couch with her cuddled into his chest, her little blue eyes blinking up at him. He’s just as enraptured by her.
“Hate to interrupt the bonding time, but I need to nurse her.”
He startles. “Oh, yeah.” He shifts forward to ease the transition.
“It won’t bother you if I feed her out here, will it?”
“Don’t worry about me, Leila. You do what you need to.”
“Just making sure. Don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
He stretches tall, studying me like he’s ready to take on the world. “Has someone made you feel guilty for feeding our daughter?”
“Well, no,” I hesitate. “It’s just, breastfeeding requires, you know. Breasts. I didn’t want to just whip them out and you panic.”
“Leila Grace, I need you to look at me and listen very carefully.”
I do.
“You are providing nourishment to our daughter with your body. Not every woman can, and not every woman wants to. But you’ve chosen to. If anyone gives you shit for it, you knee them in the balls then let me know so that I can lay them out, too. Got me?”
“Yes, sir,” I say before I can stop myself.
He huffs a breath and looks away, but I still catch the way his cheeks redden, the way his pupils dilate. Clearing his throat, heshifts to the conversation we need to have while I settle in the recliner.
Kaia eagerly latches on as soon as I offer her a nipple, and when I look up, I’m surprised to find Drew studying my face. I figured his eyes would be on the exposed breast, but of course he’s too good of a guy to look where he shouldn’t.
“I know I’ve said it, but I’m sorry for not being there for any of this.”
“I know you are.”
“I didn’t listen to your voicemails until the other morning. Or read your texts. I told myself it was for the best.” He pauses for a second, as if to gather his thoughts. “I was…not in the best mental state right after everything happened.”
“I know, it’s—”
“Let me finish. Please,” he says, cutting me off. “I’d already worked it out with my dad to come back up. He gave me a long weekend. You sent me a text, worrying about how to tell Gavin that we’d been sneaking around under his nose for years. Then I started worrying, scared you’d decide it wasn’t worth the trouble. That I wasn’t worth the trouble.”
“Drew, no,” I whisper.
