Page 14 of Saving Grace
I chuckle as I rotate the shoulder a few times, trying to work out the twinge I now feel. “I’d just get them ready myself. What’s a little more damage from slinging saddles?”
“Not funny.” He shakes his head in disbelief, or maybe in total belief. He knows how stubborn I am. “Gavin just called. Said he wanted to talk if you had time.”
I pat my back pocket, realizing I must have left my phone in the barn. “How long have I been out here?”
“About an hour.”
I reach a hand down to scratch the mare on her withers, whispering encouragement and praise before slinging my leg over and dismounting. “Such a good girl,” I murmur while letting her scratch against me until a farmhand steps up and takes the reins from me to untack and hose her down.
“I can literally feel you worrying, Dec,” I say as I rake my hand through sweat-soaked hair.
“Are you sure you aren’t jumping too fast here?”
“You mean with Leila? It’s not like I’m jumping into bed with her.”
“You already did that, didn’t you?” he asks wryly.
I grip the ends of my hair, frustration pouring out of me on a groan. “That wasn’t fair,” I finally say. “You know damn well that I’m in love with that girl. I have been since I was twelve yearsold. And I am going to regret the last year until the day that I die. But you do not get to throw my daughter in my face.”
He opens his mouth, probably to try to smooth over his words, but I cut him off. It’s been long enough. I’ve kept my feelings from that time to myself for long enough. Looking my brother dead in the eye, I tell him the truth of what happened after he walked in on us.
“I was going to drive back up that next weekend. I’d already cleared it with Dad. Told him why and everything. Then she texted me. Said she needed to figure things out on her own for a bit. To give her some time to tell Gavin about us. She didn’t know I’d already talked to him. Asked for his blessing the same day I bought the ring.” I huff a laugh, but it’s filled with so much pain at the memories that surge forward that it comes out choked. “Then the fiasco with Havoc happened, the surgeries, everything. She called, texted, left messages. I ignored them all, because I knew I wasn’t good enough for her. Didn’t listen to them until the other day.”
“Drew.” It’s not often my brother’s voice cracks with emotion. I can read the apology on his face, but it isn’t good enough.
“No. You weren’t supportive when you found us together back in October. You’re being a dick about things right now. I will do my job to the best of my ability, but my personal life and choices are not your concern. And if you know what’s good for you, you’ll keep your mouth shut around my daughter and the mother of my child.” I start the walk into town, calling over my shoulder, “I’ll take the other mare for a spin when it cools off this evening.”
No footsteps follow me. No voices holler after me. It hurts more than it should.
***
It’s more than a little tempting to head over to Riley’s Bar and Grill, but I’m unprepared to handle any heart-to-heart conversations with Jace after the way today has gone. Instead, I cut across the town square to slip inside The Write Brew. Maybe Kelsey can slip me one of her “off-the-record” frilly coffee drinks. Don’t judge. They taste like coffee milkshakes when she makes them.
Instead of a sugar rush, an unexpected scolding cuts me off before I can decide if I want caramel or chocolate or both.
“Andrew Malakai Flynn, how dare you.”
I freeze, the sound of my mother’s voice locking me in place. “I don’t even have the door to The Write Brew all the way open yet, and I’m already getting full named?”
“Don’t you talk back to your mama, boy,” she scolds with a smack to the back of my head. It’s then that I take in who else is in the little café. Kelsey and Jett are at one of the couches on the bookstore side, a tiny bundle tucked into Jett’s chest.
Uh-oh.
“You have some explaining to do,” Mama whispers. Her eyes are shining with joy, but there’s too many questions in that gaze.
I wrap my mom into a tight hug, praying she doesn’t disown me for not filling her in on everything from the last few days. Months?
I’m severely lacking in what the protocol is for telling your mother that you had a secret relationship that resulted in a baby and then you unknowingly abandoned baby and mother because you were too selfish to listen to messages.
Yeah, that sounds like a perfect thing to tell the most nurturing human being to grace this Earth.
I slip away from her and walk over to Jett, silently begging her to pass my daughter to me. In true Jett fashion, she sticks her tongue out at me but ultimately hands over Kaia after making me use the hand sanitizer on the table next to her.
I bounce gently with Kaia curled into my arm. It’s still terrifying to hold such a small, fragile being, but I’m getting more comfortable with it.
Kaia’s eyes are so blue. I can’t help but wonder if she’ll end up with my eyes or if they’ll turn as she gets older. Studying her face, I step closer to my mom.
“Mama, I’d like you to officially meet Kaia. Your granddaughter.”
