Page 52 of Taming a Menace
“I’m not sure what changes I want to make at this point.”
“That’s something for you to think about then. I’m pretty sure you expressed to me that your goal wasnotto go back to prison.”
“That would be correct.”
“Keep that in mind while you work on this assignment,” she said, passing me a sheet of paper.
“My mind is occupied enough with you. Just know that I know you think about this dick just as much as I think about you, beautiful. See you Thursday.”
“See you Thursday, Mr. Glover. I expect you to bring that homework back completed. No blank spaces this time.”
“Got it. I’m kind of nervous about our next session. I usually put out on the fourth date.”
“Get out, Mr. Glover.”
As much as I liked messing with Iyla, I was still committed to my promise to behave. I actually liked talking to her about myself. She made me feel seen and heard. She listened to me without making me feel like she was passing judgment.
It could have been due to her job, but I had never felt so comfortable telling someone my darkest secrets. Not that I went into great detail, but I opened the door for future conversations. I felt comfortable with Iyla period. I had never been so motivated to grow and change.
I scanned the form she’d given me as I walked out of the building. What Triggers Me was written in bold at the top of the page. I wasn’t sure if there was enough space to answer that question, but I would try. Iyla was right.
I wanted to change. I wanted to be the kind of man who she didn’t feel like she needed to fear. I wanted to be the kind of man who deserved to be in her presence. I wanted to be better for her. I wanted to be better with her.
Nine
Iyla
Keywan Glover was as intriguing as he was annoying. What annoyed me most about him was how much I enjoyed seeing him. Not just because he was fine as hell either but that definitely didn’t hurt.
He was charming and charismatic. He felt like the type of guy that my mom warned me about. That only made him more fascinating. Key knew how to push my buttons and just when to let up off of them. The man knew I wanted him and had said as much. Still he only tossed out little grenades like that to get in my head and make me question everything I thought was right.
I knew that he was off limits, but he had this way of making the rules and regulations seem trivial. As a habitual rule follower, that didn’t sit right with me. I didn’t like doing things that I knew damn well I wasn’t supposed to be doing. My anxiety wasn’t set up for that.
Thankfully, he was keeping his word and behaving for the most part. Here and there he would throw in a little slickcomment, but I knew it was in his nature to toe the line. As long as he didn’t cross it, we were good.
It felt good that he was taking our therapy sessions seriously. I was surprised when he came in with his homework assignment completed in full. He liked to skirt around my questions, but I could tell that they at least got his wheels turning. Some things were more difficult than others to discuss. I understood that completely.
I loved Fridays because they set off the weekend. I didn’t hate my job, but I enjoyed getting a break to unwind. I liked not having to worry about being somewhere. The weekends used to be my favorite until I ran into Key.
It was silly how much I looked forward to seeing him for our sessions. My eagerness to be in his presence wasn’t just because of the good food he always brought me, but it definitely didn’t hurt. On our last visit he’d brought me oxtails, rice and peas, and cabbage. Eventually they were going to have to roll me out of the building in a wheelbarrow.
My attempt to stop him from bringing me lunch fell on deaf ears. I really didn’t want him to stop anyway, but it just felt wrong. It wasn’t uncommon for patients to bring in gifts or small tokens of their appreciation. However, I did try to discourage them from doing so. Keywan wasn’t the type to listen.
I was stressed out at how bad I wanted him. Maybe once our sessions were completed, we could explore something even if it was only sexual. Stress made me hungry. Thinking about Keywan feeding me during our sessions only made it worse. I could cook, but my skill level wasn’t good enough to satisfy my taste buds at the moment. I needed something both good and bad, like the dangerously sexy man plaguing my thoughts.
Since it was after ten on a Friday night my choices were limited. Although I had to drive all the way across town, I knew my favorite take-out spot was the perfect remedy for mycravings. Dragging myself off the couch, I stuck my feet into the pair of slides that I wore around the house and grabbed my phone and keys off the coffee table before heading out.
When I made it to the car, I used my phone to look up their number. I wanted to call in my order so I could just pick it up when I got there. I rolled my eyes when the phone rang through to the recording twice. It was a fifteen-minute drive. I would try to call a couple more times before I made it there just to speed up the process if possible.
The drive to my old neighborhood made me nostalgic. Not because I missed living there but because I missed Wyatt. No matter how much I hated him, I missed what we had. I missed the version of him I’d fallen head over heels in love with. Going to one of our favorite spots didn’t make it any better.
I missed having someone to spend boring nights at home with. I missed the companionship. There was no use in calling my sister because I knew she was spending quality time with her husband. As much as I enjoyed my newfound independence, I missed having someone to share my life with. Things were all good as long as I was busy. It was in the confines of my own home or sitting outside of my favorite eatery that the loneliness started to creep in.
I refused to settle for bullshit, which was why I changed my number and blocked Wyatt on all social media outlets. He’d reached out a few times through friends, but I meant what I said. I was done with him. He had bigger fish to fry than me with a daughter to raise. It would seem that would be enough to get him out of my hair.
I drug myself out of the car, shaking my head at the line inside. There were only three people in line but that didn’t include the ones leaning on the wall and sitting in the lobby area waiting to pick up their orders. I knew I should have kept calling until I got someone. Then again, I could see why they weren’tanswering the phone. They were busy as hell, especially for this time of night.
When I walked inside, the aroma of the food made my mouth water. The food was definitely worth the drive and the wait. As the first person in line ordered and stepped aside to wait, I got a little more excited. It had been months since I’d eaten there.
