Page 50 of Taming a Menace
“What is it?”
“There’s this woman I’ve been seeing. She’s so pretty and fine. If you ever saw her smile you would know why I’m so smitten with her. For three whole years, I laid up on a hard ass bunk trying to imagine her lying next to me. I fell in love with her eyes every night as I fell asleep. That girl was just in my imagination until I had the misfortune of being put in therapy. Life brought her back to me. I can’t let her go now. I’m even more crazy about her now than I was the day we met. My heart literally pounds every time I enter a room that she’s in. Not only is she beautiful, but she’s smart. She’s giving me a hard time, but she’s coming around.”
“Interesting,” she said, scribbling something on her notepad.
“Are you dating again?”
“I’m not at liberty to discuss my personal life.”
“So I’m supposed to have one sided conversations and tell you all of my darkest secrets while you just absorb it all? That doesn’t make sense. How are we going to connect if we can’t have an open conversation?”
“You’re helping me to understand you through conversation about you and your life, not mine.”
“Right. I guess I can get that. Well you might not want to tell me anything about you, but let me tell you about my weekend. Is that OK?”
“Absolutely.” She nodded.
“I went to an event with my brother Kannon. He’s a celebrity bodyguard. Well now he owns the company that provides the security for them and a lot of events, but he fills in as needed. Anyway I ran into the girl I was telling you about with a couple of her friends. I felt like it was fate that I saw her. Neither of us discussed going to the club. I fell out with the club scene in my early twenties. It’s not a place for someone with a hair pin trigger. There’s too much trouble to get into in an environment like that. I try to avoid my known triggers.”
“That’s a good practice. Did something trigger you at the club event?”
“A guy got loud and belligerent with my lady friend. The fear in her eyes put me into immediate action.”
“Because of your need to defend those that can’t defend themselves?” she quizzed.
“I guess so. Did I ever tell you why I went to prison?”
“No,” she said, lowering her glasses and sitting back in her chair.
“I was shopping for a private dinner. I’ve gone to that particular grocery store a hundred times. I happened to see a couple fighting. None of my business. Right?”
“Right.”
“That’s what I thought until he slapped her. Ms. Iyla, you should’ve seen the poor girl. She had to be about a hundred and ten pounds soaking wet. When he hit her, she flew into the frozen vegetable freezer. That’s the last thing I remember. I didn’t even realize that I was beating his ass until security was pulling me off him.”
“Why do you think seeing someone else’s abuse triggers such a response from you?”
“Well like you said, it seems like there was probably a time when I needed defending, but no one defended me.”
“You didn’t seem to think that was the case.”
“I said I couldn’t think of an example. It’s something I’ve never considered.”
“I would like for you to think about that between now and Thursday. If you come up with some examples, write them down. I think it’s a good idea for you to start carrying around a notebook so you can write down your thoughts and identify your triggers,” she said, opening the top drawer on her desk and pulling out a small tablet.
“Like a diary?”
“Like a journal.”
I shrugged. “So a diary.”
“You can call it whatever you want to call it. I just need you to jot down what you come up with so we can discuss it on your next visit.”
“I’m willing to try it.”
“Good.” She nodded. “I was going over your paperwork from last week and I noticed that you left some of the questions blank.”
“Which ones?” I asked her.
