Page 64 of A Witch and Her Dragon
“Excuse us,” one of the girls says as she slips by. Her friend glances at me, then at Raelan, and I don’t miss the way her gaze sweeps quickly up and down his sturdy frame, his broad shoulders, the sharp features of his face.
I bristle.
Then they’re both gone. And Raelan is still looking at me.
He clears his throat. “I think it’s best we stay here.”
My eyes narrow as the girls’ voices drift away down the stairwell. “Why?”
Now Raelan’s eyes slide away from mine, to look at something over my shoulder. His gaze goes faraway. “It’s not appropriate for us to be alone together, Your Highness.”
My fingers curl into fists. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He doesn’t respond. His silence is a dagger pressing slowly into my chest.
“Raelan,look at me. That’s an order.”
Reluctantly, he draws his gaze back to mine. With the sun setting over his shoulder, his features are cast mostly into shadow, but I can see the flicker of his pupils, the way they very briefly pull into narrow slits before returning to normal.
“What’s going on? Ever since Samhain, you’ve been... different.” The heat in my chest cools for a moment, and I say more softly, “I don’t understand. Has something changed?”
Raelan takes another breath, but he doesn’t soften. If anything, the look in his dark eyes only hardens. “My behavior on Samhain was unacceptable. I apologize. I assure you, it’ll not happen again.”
His words hit me so hard I almost double over. The dagger finds its way into my heart.
“Raelan,” I whisper, taking a step forward and reaching a hand out for him.
But he takes one crisp step back, out of my reach. His eyes don’t soften.
“Why are you being like this?” I ask.
Finally, a look of emotion brushes against his lips, his eyes. Something like heat flickers in his gaze.
“I’m being like this,” he says, voice hard, “because I must. Because we can’t keep doing the things we’ve been doing.”
“I can’t believe we’re back to this again.” I let out an incredulous laugh and shove my fingers through my hair. “We already talked about this. I thought we agreed.”
Raelan shakes his head firmly. “No. And I’ll not be talked out of it, Alina.”
My name sounds forbidden on his lips.
As I stand there in the sunset light, with Raelan just out of my reach, I’m overcome with a confusing mixture of anger and sadness and pride.
I thought he cared about me. I thought he wanted me.
But if he can pull away from me like this, deny me this way, then he doesn’t feel toward me the way I feel toward him.
And I’m just making a fool of myself.
“I-I see.”
Straightening up, I take a breath. I remind myself that I’m the princess, granddaughter to the king of Elarwyn. I can’t be seen crying in the north tower over my knight, the man whose duty it is to protect me. Especially not whenhe’s looking at me with such an expressionless mask while I crumble before him.
I pull myself together, at least for the moment, for as long as Raelan’s eyes are on me.
If he wants to go back to being cold acquaintances, fine. I can play this game too. Even if it rips me apart inside.
“Very well, Sir Ashvale.”
