Page 19 of The Pureblood Princess
“Look there,” Lady Gray says, pointing as a silver light streaks across the sky.
“A falling star.” A gentle smile curls Nadia’s lips. “Make a wish, Mama.”
Closing her eyes, Nadia wishes upon the star, picturing a green-eyed babe held lovingly in Theodore’s arms. When she opens her eyes again, her mother is still standing with her head tipped back, but tears now glisten in her eyes.
“What’s the matter?” Reaching out, she places a hand upon her mother’s arm, and Lady Gray quickly turns and wipes the moisture from her eyes.
“I’d worried... After our last conversation, I feared I may never see you again.” Her smile is sad as she turns to look at Nadia.
“I never meant to make you feel that way, Mama, and for that I am so, so very sorry.” With a gentle tug, she pulls her mother into an embrace, and Lady Gray smells the way she always has: like love, like Nadia’s childhood, likehome. But home isn’t the same as it once was, nor can it ever be the same again.
Remembering this, she pulls out of the embrace and guides her mother back to the veranda, where they take a seat on a cushioned bench.
“I wanted to talk to you about... everything.” Even saying it out loud, bringing up this conversation, feels like digging into an old wound, but it must be done. “Have you spoken to Lord Gray since our confrontation?”
“Must you call him that? He may not be your blood father, Adelina, but—” Lady Gray stops abruptly, then smiles somewhat bashfully. “Nadia, I mean. Forgive me, dear. I’ve known you by one name for nearly twenty years; it’s not so easy to change.”
“It’s all right, Mama. But I cannot call that man my father any longer. Did he speak to you of my parents? Of Kirill and Vera Magdalena?”
Lady Gray shifts upon the bench and pulls her shawl tighter about her shoulders. She worries at her lower lip, and Nadia waits patiently for her to work through whatever it is she needs to say.
“We did speak of it, and your father told me what happened that night.”
When she doesn’t go on, Nadia leans forward eagerly. “And? What did he say?”
“It was an accident, dear. He never meant to run that carriage off the road, and by the time he dove into the river and pulled you out, well, your parents...” She plays with the hem of her shawl, twisting it around and around her fingers. Her hands are gently wrinkled with age, the decades she’s lived evident upon her skin.
At first, Nadia wants to tell her mother how wrong she is, that she’s been lied to yet again. But seeing her mother’s hands in this pale light, the same hands that held her when she cried, that tied ribbons into her hair, that helped guide her small fingers over the keys of the pianoforte, makes Nadia soften.
Her mother need not bear this burden. Knowing the truth of it all would tear her apart inside, would turn everything she’s ever known inside out. And though Nadia wants her mother to know Lord Gray’s secrets, it’s perhaps only for her own benefit, and knowing that now, she lets out a gentle sigh.
She will go along with it, if only for her mother’s sake.
“Accident or not, it did happen, and he lied to me for many years. I cannot see him as my father any longer. Butyou”—she takes her mother’s hand—“will always be my mother. You do know that, yes?”
Lady Gray nods, her puckered lips hinting at the tears she’s fighting to hold back. “I know,” she whispers softly, “though it feels nice to hear you say it... Nadia.”
A grin stretches across Nadia’s face, and she leans forward to pull her mother into another hug. When they part, Lady Gray wipes her eyes.
“Robert carries a heavy weight upon his heart for what happened that night. Do you think you might ever find it in your heart to forgive him?”
The question makes heat flare in Nadia’s belly, but she takes a moment to breathe it out so that she will not unleash her anger on someone so undeserving. “I cannot say. Perhaps one day I’ll find the capacity for forgiveness, but today is not that day. I do hope you’ll try to understand.”
“Of course. But it’s so difficult not having you around. The country house is stifling without you. I don’t know what to do with myself, and it’s so dreadfully quiet.” Her brown eyes flick to Nadia’s, something like excitement brewing in them. “Haveyou and the viscount discussed...” She glances back over her shoulder into the house as if she’s about to share a secret. “Children?”
Nadia’s laughter is easy and light. “In passing, though I expect we’ll discuss it at length now that we’re to be married.” The ruby on her left hand winks in the moonlight, and she admires it before continuing. “Early on, when we were coming to know each other, he mentioned four or five—”
Lady Gray gasps, one hand coming up to cover her mouth. “Four or five? Oh, heavens. I can think of nothing better.”
A chill breeze sweeps across the veranda then, tossing Nadia’s dark hair and making Lady Gray shiver.
“Come, Mama.” Nadia stands and offers her mother a hand. “Let’s take our tea, and perhaps we can discuss names.”
Lady Gray looks ready to melt into a puddle of delight, and Nadia is filled with joy as she takes her mother by the hand and leads her back into the warmth of the house.
Chapter Seven
Nadia, Eliza, and Lady Grayspend the next few days sitting before the fireplace in the drawing room or walking the spacious grounds surrounding the manor. They toss food to the fish living in the pond and enjoy one another’s company until the day of their departure arrives.
