Page 73 of Mirror of Malice
I realized my words sounded more like an invitation than a threat. Blood and earth, this man had a way of drawing out a side of me that even Jasper never saw.
Another strong breeze pushed through the air, and this time, my teeth actually chattered. The fire flickered, the heat unable to fight back against the chill of the night.
“You’re cold,” Penn said.
“Aren’t you?”
“We need to sleep together tonight.”
An image flashed in my mind: me, naked and writhing underneath him. “Absolutely not,” I said, but just the thought of my body burrowed against his was enough to warm me.
“Then you’ll freeze,” he said, no emotion on his face. Clearly this was just a transaction to him, like everything with the kingof thieves. “The temperature has been dropping every night, and we can’t build up a big fire that would draw attention to us.”
Damnit, he was right. “Fine,” I grumbled. “Get over here.”
I spread out my bedroll and lay down, staring out into the darkness. I felt Penn’s body behind mine, his arms coming over me, and suddenly, I was finding it very hard to breathe. My senses were on fire, the smell of earth and musk enveloping me, his heat seeping into me, the feel of his hands resting on my stomach, setting my skin alight. I hated that he made me feel this way when I clearly meant nothing to him. He’d used me over and over, was continuing to use me, even if he’d given me a choice. I was nothing but a tool to him, something to wield to help him get what he wanted. I had to remember that, to continually fight against whatever feelings were rising up in me the more I got to know him.
“Sleep, Lilypad,” Penn said into my ear. “Tomorrow we arrive in Apolis.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
We’d been walking for hours. My throat was dry, my legs aching from the effort of trudging through sand. I was so sick of sand. The grit, the way it cut against my face, got into my eyes, coated my tongue. I felt it everywhere, and it made me want to scream. I had no idea how people lived in this place. I’d once thought it beautiful. But that was when I’d been a guest. When I could come and go as I pleased. Now, I never wanted to see this place again.
“We’re close now,” Penn said from beside me, pointing. The landscape was slowly changing around us, the sand dunes spreading out, flattening, the sand growing thinner, and in the distance I could see the rocky terrain of the water court, the brilliant white houses with the terra cotta roofs, the sea spreading out over the horizon like a sparkling sapphire under the sun.
I almost cried in relief. Not only because I’d no longer have to deal with this terrible sand but because, soon enough, I’d get tosee my friend, the first familiar person I’d seen in so long. Other than Jasper, but that clearly hadn’t been a pleasant reunion.
I chanced a glance at Penn, arching my neck to look at him. He stared ahead, resolute, his skin coated in a light layer of sand, his hair glossy and shining under the sun. He looked at me, and I quickly looked away.
We’d woken up that morning, snuggled together. His arms had been wound tight around me, his cheek pressed against mine. Our legs were twined together like twisted vines, where you couldn’t even see where one began and the other ended. Penn had still been asleep, his chest rising and falling with a slow motion, and I’d been frozen in his arms, unable to move. It had felt so good.
Why had it felt so good?
Maybe I’d just been imprisoned for so long, desperate for any kind of contact, that I’d have been thrilled to be snuggled by anyone. Except Jasper. I’d stab him in the eye if he tried to cuddle with me.
Plus, I’d just found out my betrothed wanted nothing to do with me, had never really loved me. My heart was aching. It didn’t feel particularly achey, but maybe I was just numb to the feeling.
I certainly hadn’t been numb this morning, heat spreading to my belly, my thighs shaking, my core damp with need.
It was a natural bodily reaction. Penn was handsome. Gorgeous, if I wanted to get specific. Which I didn’t.
Any woman in my position would be feeling the things I was feeling. Spirits below, I didn’t need to be thinking about this right now. We had a mission to complete?—
“Are you sure you’re going to be able to do this?” Penn asked, interrupting my spiral.
“Yes,” I snapped, more irritated with myself than with him. “I already told you I would. Why are you asking me this now? When we’re so close to Apolis?”
“Well, you’ve been worrying at your bottom lip all morning and spent the last half hour picking at your nails so much they’re bleeding.”
I looked down. Oh. So I had been.
“You look pale. Paler than usual.”
I scowled at that.
His lips quirked. “And you haven’t said more than two words to me today.”
If he only knew what I really was worried about.
